Gay and Gay-rights supporters: Does it make you angry when certain DU'ers.

[Liberal Veteran]

...make excuses for anti-gay bigotry?

I was just in another thread and was appalled that someone was making excuses for a company's policy on domestic partner coverage for gays.

Not the first time I have seen that happen either and maybe I am not used to their being dissention about this issue on DU, but it burns me up to hear it from someone who describes themselves as liberal or a democrat.

[vi5]

1. Maybe I miss that on here.....

I'm not gay but anti-gay bigotry raises my ire like very little else. It's the last acceptable bigotry that's still for some inexplicable reason still o.k. for people to wear proudly.

But i haven't seen many excuses made on here for it. Again, maybe i'm not clicking the right threads.

[Blue Wally]

2. Democrats

Have a very wide range of views on gays and lesbians. A very large part of the party base doesn't mind if Jack and Jeff or Elaine and mary are roomates or share a house. They just don't think that they need to be privy as to the details of who is sleeping where. This same part of the party base would just as soon that Jack and jeff don't try to "get it on" in the bushes at the public park. In other words, "don't ask, don't tell" works for them. Is that bigotry??

[truthspeaker]

4. Yes, "don't ask don't tell" is bigotry

[Connie_Corleone]

7. Stereotype much?

If Elaine says Mary is her girlfriend or partner, I think most Democrats wouldn't care. You act like gay couples are going into graphic details about their personal lives.

[kayell]

11. Assuming that jack & jeff are more likely to "get it on" in the bushes,

as you so quaintly put it, than are jack & jill, is also bigotry.

[Cleita]

15. That excuse sounds like the one back in the days of

segregation.

"I believe negroes should have equal rights, but I don't think they should live in white neighborhoods or date whites."

I wonder if a heterosexual couple "getting it on" in the bushes in the park is more acceptable to "those" people?

Or, how about this one?

"Women can't do that job because they don't have enough upper body strength, or height, or don't belong in a warehouse, or....."

[Vladimir]

20. What if me and my female SO went into the bushes

and got it on? I'm quite fond of that sort of thing, especially if its raining...

[Liberal Veteran]

28. Yeah, and straight people never do inappropriate things in public?

What exactly was going on "On Blueberry Hill"?

Is it not public when teens and adults go "parking"?

[Guy_Montag]

3. What about when Du'ers

make excuses for DU'ers that make excuses for anti-gay bigotry?

If they don't see your point of view, you must change their minds.

[Misunderestimator]

5. Yes, just as much as sexism around here by some...

It is surprising to find out that there are liberals who actually can't imagine standing in another's shoes long enough to understand why there is a problem with a company providing benefits to employees' animals when they do not offer domestic partner benefits. Couldn't be a simpler example by which to understand the problem. :shrug:

[Kanary]

12. I was thinking of sexism, also.

There are many examples of discrimination here at DU, and it blew me away when I first started reading here. It *still* blows me away that there is so little awareness, but it doesn't surprise anymore.

When sexist crap is accepted, and anti-gay comments are accepted, and anti-poor comments are accepted, we know we have a problem in the Dem party. Of course, then there are those who just say, "Oh, it's only trolls who say that".

Unless/until *ALL* minority groups start supporting each other, we're going to continue to see the discrimination. Divide and conquer WORKS -- even here at DU.

Are we yet ready to talk about supporting each other?

Kanary

[Name removed]

6. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Misunderestimator]

8. Great... I hope that was sarcasm.

:hi:

[Kanary]

13. Thanks for exemplifying my point.

I could use anti-gay epithets to further state the point, but....... I don't operate that way.

I wish you didn't either, but then..... you seem proud of it.

So much for any hope of crossing that divide and supporting each other.

Kanary

[Misunderestimator]

17. One person at a time.... Let's not go generalizing...

I'm all for crossing the divide! :hi:

[Kanary]

19. Generalizing?

I'm just as upset about sexism as you are about anti-gay remarks.

I will speak up for my concerns, the same as you will speak up for yours.

These divides are just what makes us so vulnerable to the Powers That Be.

Those divides aren't crossed by telling one side to give up their concerns.

Kanary

[Misunderestimator]

26. Whoa... where did I tell you to give up your concerns?

I am just as upset about sexism as you are. And I speak up about it all the time. All I'm saying is that you sounded as if you were giving up on crossing the divide, while I was holding my hand out. Sorry if you misinterpreted me.

[Kanary]

32. I give up with people who insist on their right to be sexist.

And, for people who defend them.

If you're holding your hand out, then I will reach my hand out from this side.....

I've been told to give up *my* concerns for too long....... I can no longer do that.

I will continue to speak out against the sexist terms used here so much at DU.

I will also continue to speak out against the ugly things said about poor folk, and I hope that you will, also.

Kanary

[Misunderestimator]

35. Perhaps you've never read my posts... if you had you would know that

1. I am a woman, 2. I never hesitate to piss off sexists and racists and bigots around here. I don't know exactly why I just rubbed you the wrong way. Hopefully it's temporary. :)

Again... please tell me WHERE I said to give up your concerns? It was you said that you were giving up on crossing the divide with the poster above. "So much for any hope of crossing that divide and supporting each other."

I was attempting to let you know that not all gay people are the same... but maybe you don't want to cross the divide.

[Cheswick2.0]

36. Kanary, I think you and MU are in agreement about sexism

I may be missing something, but I am almost positive that the two of you are in agreement.

[Ripley]

14. How nice of you to call a long time DUer a slut and whore...

And we all know who you're talking about. You've been here, what, under a year and you call her names?

If you read her posts you would see she was discussing hypocritical posts about company policies, not saying gays should not be covered.

[Cheswick2.0]

22. Thank you Ripley

Don't you just hate it when people purposely don't get the point you are making just so they can attack you?

Though I can understand that some people are very literal minded unfortunately.

[Ripley]

27. No problem.

I've been seeing some really nasty posts this week by people who have gotten really high post counts. Some real flamethrowers with the same old hot button issues.

Coincidink?

[Cheswick2.0]

33. I do not appreciate you calling me a slut and a whore

I think your misunderstanding of my post was intentional.

[DrWeird]

9. Don't worry about the freepers.

Just laugh when they out themselves like that.

[Beware the Beast Man]

10. Depends on your definition of bigotry.

Is this a specific, pinpoint item ( I think I know the issue in question), or is this a vague, indistinctive bigotry?

[kayell]

16. Yes, and this has been a serious problem here in the past

with certain factions here at DU defending to the death their right to say nasty things about gays while denying all the time that they are bigoted. Denial runs right through some areas of DU.

Some of the posters seem to be undercover freepers. Some sadly, are long term posters. A few of actually understood after numerous explanations. Some never will.

[meegbear]

18. Link to the original post?

eom.

[Misunderestimator]

23. Seems to be this one:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=104&topic_id=2298880#2299567

[meegbear]

31. Thanks ...

I read it and have no comment.

[Liberal Veteran]

24. No...I am not going to point any fingers and I may have overreacted.

It's just it crops up from time to time and I want to remind people that sometimes our own house needs cleaning.

[Cheswick2.0]

30. I think you already pointed fingers

and you should have tried to understand the point of my post before creating a whole new thread to claim I am an antigay bigot.

[Liberal Veteran]

34. That was hardly the only case of it happening. See up higher in this.

Should I question the poster above to make sure he or she is not being facetious?

And if you expect me to be familiar with every pissing match between people on each every thread that crosses over into unrelated threads, then it ain't gonna happen.

I doubt I was the only person to take your facetiousness the wrong way.

[Cheswick2.0]

37. you are the only one who felt a need to start a new thread about it

perhaps you should have discussed your concerns in the original thread.
The person who my post was directed to has no reason to misunderstand what I said.

[Misunderestimator]

21. The post you are referring to was misinterpreted...

it was mocking people who believe in company policy, since this was all about discrimination in company policy. Some people seem to have misinterpreted the post as the literal beliefs of the poster.

I, for one, have seen much more sexism here than gay-bigotry. :shrug:

[kayell]

29. Found it, you are right

Kind of a clumsy bit of sarcasm that backfired. (guilty of that recently myself *blush* )

I've seen a lot of both kinds of bigotry here. Sexism does seem to fly under the radar of more posters.

[rbnyc]

25. Yes.

There are just a very few topics that make me lose my civility with people, and this is one of them.

[Moderator]

38. Locking

This thread was borderline from the beginning, and has taken the expected course for the worse. You are free to debate the issues, but do not attack members of DU personally. Attack the message, not the messenger - this is clearly an attack on the messenger.