Do you have friends like this? Re-Connecting with friend of 20 years

[KoKo]

today, and asked her how she was doing with the floods in PA and NJ (Hurricane Ivan, aftermath). She and her hubby live right next to Trenton, NJ where the Delaware River and Canals flooded causing Govt. Buildings (Trenton is NJ Capitol) to flood and all the little towns we used to visit and had friends in common with are right in her home town with the "Little Theater, Restaurants and shops" we used to go to when I lived there over 10 years ago are.

This friend is a Repug..and she has her own business which she has run in Princeton, NJ for all the time I've known her.

I called in worry that she had a problem either herself or with her customers. She was "clueless" when I called her. I had to explain I called her at work because I saw terrible photos on "Weather Channel" of the floods and wondered how she was doing.

She said..."Oh...I don't know what all this stuff is. We just went out to dinner on the Delaware the night before all this started and folks were calling us the next morning asking us how we are...and there's nothing...we didn't have any rain...or anything. I had a customer talking about their daughter getting a knock on the door in middle of the night telling her to evacuate because the Canal was flooding...but I don't know what you are watching...I don't see anything here." :eyes:

I then asked her about Florida Property they just bought, and said how hard all the hurricanes had been on my family and fiends in Florida.

She replied: "Well our property is fine. No damage at all, and the Real Estate Agent told us our new Condo is going along and the Contractors are just putting in the tile we picked for our bathrooms, so I think this stuff about hurricanes is overblown." :eyes:

How do we reach folks like this? I had a hard time dealing with her..and new I couldn't get into politics because after she finished telling me she didn't know about floods and hurricanes she said she and her hubby are voting down a School Bond Issue in NJ because they pay too much taxes and she was sick of paying taxes and she thought it was parents who were living in McMansions who are paying so much they can't afford to sacrifice to send their kids to private school so they are taxing those who have grown kids out of their houses to pay for public school.

I really didn't know how to answer her. She used to be a friend of mine...a good friend. She sounded like a Freeper! Head in the sand and I know she's going to vote for Bush.

She's not poor obviously because she has her own business but she begrudges those who don't have anything as taking it away from her!

It was pretty bad...yet we used to be friends...I have to dump her..I just can't stand her attitude. :-(

On EDIT: BTW...I moved from NJ to NC, eleven years ago...so our friendship is before then...It seems we've drifted way..way ...apart since then. Yet, I'm in NC a red state and she's in a much more liberal state...what gives :shrug:

[serryjw]

1. Let me tell you an old story........

1971 I was a manager at Bullock LA. The day of the earthquake I was finally called by my boss whom said she was ok and was heading into work. She would call me from work to tell me how the store was and if I should come in........I finally went in 4 hours after the normal store opening hours. Woman were walking around the store and were truly angry that the store opened 4 hours LATE! They continued their shopping like nothing had happened that morning and thousands of people's lives had been disrupted because of the earthquake.

I have no clue whom these people are...and truly I don't want to know. You made a wise decision distancing yourself. You will never change her and I know it's sad.

[KoKo]

2. Thanks...it's amazing...all I could think of was "ostrich with head in

sand." But, if we lose our lifelong friends over George Bush...then who are we? What are we about...It's sickening. They have diven America apart...Friend against Friend...and Families against each other....

It was never like this even during Vietnam! It wasn't hatred, anger or denial like this.

We will have a Civil War of some kind...I'm convinced. :-(

[Kanary]

3. It's always an individual decision whether to keep such friends........

I know that I can't, because being on disability means that those people are voting against my very survival. That's something I just can't deal with. But, then, there are plenty of Dems who just don't "get" that part, either, and the same goes for them.

When there isn't as much of a personal hot button, sometimes people can hang in there and actually make some headway with such people. And, sometimes, the personal relationship is worth it by itself.

In any case, losing such friends is always sad....... I envy those who are able to keep lifelong friends. Although, I sometimes wonder if neither has grown, or if they just manage to stir clear of any such interaction........ in which case, I wonder how deep the friendship really is.

Life is just plain hard.

Kanary

[serryjw]

6. It's a shame we can't learn from each other....

Isn't that the whole point of growing to see other perspectives? Like I said before, I don't care that you disagree I wish they could just defend their position....and they can't. They are comfortable being self involved and selfish.

[Green Lantern]

5. Civil War?

oh yes. No doubt here. it is coming and fairly soon, no matter who is given the nod in Nov. Country is too split now, too much class division...

[Digit]

4. Your former friend has become very superficial and

shallow, while you have grown as a person.
You just need to find new friends who care about more than shopping, recipes, and redecorating. Ugh!
Send cards, letters and such....they may experience growth someday.