Anyone here think the chimp actually flew fighter jets?

[Webster Green]

I mean, we’ve all been watching this guy for awhile and I can’t believe he is capable of flying any kind of aircraft, much less a fighter jet. Remember the Segway, the golf cart, the alleged bicycle? He would have killed himself by now, had he driven fighter jets.

I imagine he had a hold of the controls at some point, but I’m talking about the chimp being one on one with the plane, flying solo, landing and taking off.

Sorry, I’m not buying it. He lies about everything, and there’s no doubt in my mind he is lying about piloting jets.

[Lancer]

1. The closest he ever got to

a "Bush Pilot" was watching Janine Turner on Northern Exposure.

[gauguin57]

13. No flippin' way would Bush ever watch "Northern Exposure."

He wouldn't understand 15/16ths of the show.

Reading Rainbow ... now that's more his speed.

[unblock]

2. there was a story from one of his buddies ... don evans?

about what apparently was the last time shrub flew. he got in a cessna, i think, don asked bush if he knew how to fly it, bush said, uh, sure, but looked at the controls like it was his first time.

apparently, they eventually got aloft, but don describes the whole experience like he honestly thought he was going to die.

maybe someone here can track down a link.

so, yes, i believe he flew a fighter plane. my guess is that he flew it terribly. i mean, really terribly.

[unblock]

4. check out this harrowing story

http://www.seanet.com/~johnco/bush102.htm


Bush really flying in a Cessna 172 in 1976:
NOT LONG AFTER Reisner's delicate trip to Midland, Bush banged on the door of Susie and Don Evans on an otherwise placid Sunday afternoon and suggested to Don that they head out to the airport and spend a few bucks for a spin over the desiccated Permian Basin in a single-engine Cessna. Susie Evans, who had gone to elementary school with Bush, was a longtime Midland presence, and when she had been dating her future husband in Houston, she had frequently stayed at the Bush house. She had moved back to Midland, and after she had heard that Bush was back in town, she and her husband had frequently invited him over.

Her husband Don Evans... Willard... was a short, fastidious, narrow-faced oilman in his early thirties who was poised to assume control of the Tom Brown Company, one of the legendary older names in the West Texas patch. Bush had begun spending more time at the Evanses' apartment in the Windsor Courts, drinking cocktails with them and leaving his laundry for Susie to do. Bush liked Evans's politics, he liked that they were about the same age and that both of them had recent MBAs. He liked the fact that Evans's old man had landed on the beach at Normandy during World War II.

Evans said he'd love to go flying. At the airport he watched Bush stare at the controls, at the panel, and he realized that Bush-though not admitting it-had no idea how to fly the thing properly. After finally figuring out how to launch the plane, Bush pushed the Cessna hard down the runway. Evans screamed, "Give it some gas!" The Cessna's warning system was blinking and crackling. Bush tried to lift his craft fast, almost as if he were piloting a jet back in the Texas Air National Guard. The plane wobbled into the air, and the unsubtle maneuvering threatened to shove it into a stall. Now the rented plane was rattling in the sky over Midland

The endless petrochemical complexes, all the aluminum and steel and smoke stacks that pockmark the Permian Basin, were spiking up just below the aircraft. Bush nervously turned to Evans, put his hand on his knee and blurted in his self-mocking West Texas way, "Okay, Evvie, I’ve got it under control."

After more seemingly endless moments, he somehow got control of the plane again. He aimed the aircraft down, and the landing was as shaky and brutal as the takeoff. The plane careened off the runway and onto the desert. Evans sighed in relief. Then an unbelieving Evans braced himself as Bush suddenly and unexpectedly spun the plane and bounced back along the runway. Evans stared at Bush. He could see the fear and panic flooding his face. Bush pressed on. Evans had no idea why Bush wanted to go again. The plane wobbled uncertainly back into the West Texas skies, and Bush turned to Evans. "Hey," said Bush airily, as if he had just had an original, amusing idea, "let's fly around Midland."

The men began cracking up. Bush brought the Cessna back to the airport. It was the last time he flew a plane. Evans would be one of the three people at Bush's side in almost every public venture for the twenty-three years.

Minutaglio pg 175&176

Here is another version:


Donnie Evans remembered a similar story involving an airplane. He told David Maraniss that less than a year after George W. first got back to Midland he came over to Donnie's house and told him he wanted to take a single-engine Cessna for a little joyride. They drove over to the airfield and got in the plane. Then George W. realized he didn't have a clue how to fly a Cessna.

"The guy didn't even know how to start the thing," Evans reportedly said. "That was a bad omen. Finally we get it started and roll down the runway, and he tries to take it straight up like a jet! We go into a stall, buzzcrs are going off. I say, 'Give it some gas!' We finally get it airborne, and he decides he better turn around and go back. I can tell he's nervous, but he says, 'Okay, Evvie, got it under control.' We come down and he lands half on the runway and half on the grass. And then he pats my leg and says don't worry, and he takes it up again. This time he's so scared he says, 'Hey, let's fly around Midland.' He had to get his confidence up. Somehow we got back safely. He's never flown again.


W:REVENGE OF THE BUSH DYNASTY Page 152

If he flew the T-41A at Moody, should have been his Primary Trainer in '68, he should have been able to fly the Cessna 172 in '76. Even if it was 12 years later, he should have been rechecked on it before the rental. Was he just screwing around? Hard to say. Does it sound like a real pilot? No.

Here is something that says he still has a license.

[SheilaT]

8. In all fairness,

flying a single engine Cessna is going to be somewhat different from flying a high-performance jet, and if he only ever flew the latter, he's going to be clueless about the former.

I suspect it's slightly like someone who only ever drove a car with automatic transmission who is then turned loose to drive a stick shift. Good luck!

[unblock]

15. it's not the fact that his training didn't transfer to a cessna

it's the fact that he decided to just fly it knowing he had zero training on that piece of equipment.

[pa28]

11. Testament to the Cessna and its forgiving qualities.

Segway: Billed as "Idiot Proof" Bush falls on his face.
Cessna: Bush tries to fly it like a fighter jet. Airplane lets him off the hook with his sorry ass intact.

[barb162]

3. hey he can't eat pretzels sitting on a couch

without falling off the couch. Remember when he bumped his head. So how could he fly a jet especially when he was plotzed in those days

[AmerDem]

5. This is shrubs idea of flying a fighter jet!

[Joanne98]

7. I love that toon........

[Joanne98]

6. Yeah, when he snorted coke his reflexes worked better.

That's why he had to quit flying. without the coke he couldn't fly? lol

[dogtag]

9. I have some proof that he did -

[daa]

10. I wonder if he wore

a sock in his crotch back then?

[RebelYell]

12. No. He flew military cargo planes back and forth from Columbia

with "tropical plants".

[gauguin57]

14. Hey flyboy!

[bklyncowgirl]

16. According to his records he did--and then was demoted to trainers

I'm sticking with the records here--they're damning enough.

Bush was a halfway decent pilot at first but apparently his performance deteriorated and the National Guard decided that they didn't want to risk having this clown flying million dollar fighter jets so they demoted him to training craft.