Please Help Me...rewrite some history.

[Hubert Flottz]

I need help writing some songs, that our singing pResident might be able to use, in his new singing career, that he just launched yesterday at our White House Holiday Tree lighting shindig.

I think the Presidude needs some fresh new material to whip on John/Jane Q Public, to sort'a try and get back into the upper thirties in the polls.(not that Shrub pays one bit of attention to the polls)

Some good beer drinking tunes, or fight songs might be just the thing to help herd the back-sliding Freepers freaks who would'a all liked to drink a few beerz with our Cowpoke in Chief just a short a year ago, back into the GOPer flock where they belong.

Here is one I wrote on the thread that inspired this thread:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=132x2286777

I hope it's a little western flavored tune that the Chief can use, for the purpose of defickling the floundering freeper faithful flockers and flockeretts.

'Get Along Little Dumbya'

By Hubert Flottz

I'm an old cowherd from the Rio Grande
And my mind is blowed I got a teeny gland
I'm a cowherd who's married to a cow
And I drink more beer than my cow allows
And I sure ain't a-fixin' for to quit it now
Yippie-yi-yo-ki-yay, Yippie-yi-yo-ki-yay

I'm an old cowherd from the Rio Grande
Never learned to ride I can hardly to stand
I'm a drunken fool who ain't up to date
I know every bar in the Lone Star state
'cause I drive 'round stoned in my Ford V-8
Yippie-yi-yo-ki-yay


And I come to town for some campaign dough
I sing all the songs that the crackheads know
And I drinks Jim Beam and I snort some blow
'cause I learned from Rush on the radio
Yippie-yi-yo-ki-yay
Yippie-yi-yo-ki-yay
Yippie-yi-yo-ki-yay

[Hubert Flottz]

1. HEY...it's early...okay?

Keep movin', movin', movin',
The country's disapprovin',
Keep your dollars movin' Rawdeal!

Don't try to understand me,
'Cause pure bullshit I hand yee,
I charge five thousand dollars for a meal.

My cronies calculatin'
The poorhouse is a-waitin',
We've done stole every dollar we could steal.

Move 'em on, head 'em up,
Head 'em up, move 'em out,
Move 'em on, head 'em out Rawdeal!

Set 'em out, ride 'em in
Ride 'em in, let 'em out,
Cut 'em out, ride 'em in Rawdeal...

[sofa king]

2. Let's Call the Whole Thing Off

Things have come to a pretty pass
My approval is falling flat,
For I like politics in the gutter
While you're just a dirty 'Rat,
Goodness knows when the end times will be
Oh I don't know where I'm at
It looks as if we two will never be one
Something must be done:

You say disclosure and I say launder,
You say exposure and I say squander
Disclosure, exposure, Launder, squander,
Let's call Jack Abramoff

You want an exit plan and I like Schiavo,
You hate opti-scan and I like bravado
Exit plan, opti-scan, Schiavo, bravado,
Let's call Jack Abramoff

But oh, if I call Jack Abramoff
Then I must part
And oh, if I ever part,
Then that might break my heart

So if you like impeachin' and I like leechin',
You wear the leeches and I'll give up peaches
'Cause it's on your blood that I feed,
I'll never call Abramoff off
Let's call Jack Abramoff.


There are two more choruses, but I don't think I have it in me.

[Hubert Flottz]

3. THAT...Is GREAT!

I salute your skill! * Very well done!

[soup]

5. Ooh, I like it!

toe tappin' catchy timely and nicely done. :insert applause smiley:

Depressing as all-get-out, isn't it?

[soup]

4. Nicely done, Mr. Flottz.

Sure to become a classic around the campfire.

Here's a couple he could sing for the kiddies. Goat books are just so 2001. The tykes might be a bit confused at first, but I'm sure he can convince them this is the way they were meant to be sung:

how much for a tax cut for the wealthy
how much can we draw from the well
how much for a tax cut for the wealthy
the rest of you can just go to hell.

Im a little despot
smirk and gloat.
here is my brother
there goes your vote.
when I stop the recount
hear me spout
It's all over
democracy's out.

---

I missed the festivities yesterday (lucky me). Did they include this one?

Deck the halls with troops in body bags
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Up the rhetoric as support sags
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Don our youth in war apparel,
Fa la la, la la la, la la la.
Troll the noble cause stay the course carol,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

See the blazing world before us,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Feed the fire or you're not for us.
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

Follow me in merry measure,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
While we strip the earth of treasure,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

More out of control as each year passes,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Fasten your seatbelts, lads and lasses,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.


Sing we oblivious, all together,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Heedless of the changing weather,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.

[Hubert Flottz]

6. Great Job Soup! ***** Souper, in fact!

Shrub is in the spirit 'cause the spirits are in him! Gallons of spirits! From the looks of things, 100% EVIL spirits!

Check this out::::

Roy Rogers Riders Club Rules:

1. Be neat and clean.
2. Be courteous and polite.
3. Always obey your parents.
4. Protect the weak and help them.
5. Be brave but never take chances.
6. Study hard and learn all you can.
7. Be kind to animals and take care of them.
8. Eat all your food and never waste any.
9. Love God and go to Sunday school regularly.
10. Always respect our flag and our country.

http://www.royrogers.com/happy_trails-index.html


Somehow I don't think Roy and Dale would have given Buckaroo Bush a
passing grade on being a REAL COWBOY! Shrub would get kicked out of the Roy Rodgers Rider's Club PDQ I'm guessing. Items 2,4,5,6,7,9,and 10 would add up to a score of Zero for Cowboy George.

*************************

Thank GAWD and Greyhound!


I've made a small fortune, and Bush squandered it all.
He's shamed me till I feel about one inch tall.
He said he'd unite us and make Washington change,
so I gritted my teeth and tried not to complain.

Now he'll come to us all with a simple goodbye.
He'll tell us he's leaving, but he's told lots of lies.
We're here at the station and he's getting on.
And all I can think of is.........

Thank Gawd and Greyhound he's gone!

Thank Gawd and Greyhound he's gone!
I didn't know how much longer I could go on,
watching him take the respect out of me,
watching him make a total wreck out of me.
That big diesel motor is a playing my song.

Thank Gawd and Greyhound he's gone!

Thank Gawd and Greyhound he's gone!
That load on my mind got lighter when he got on.
That shiney old bus is a beautiful sight,
with the black smoke rolling up around the tail lights.
It may sound kinda cruel, but I've been silent too long:

Thank Gawd and Greyhound he's gone!

Thank Gawd and Greyhound he's gone!

That will be one of the greatest days this country has EVER had, the day the idiot heads back to Texas FOREVER!