I'm starting a VAST LEFT-WING CONSPIRACY. Who wants in?

[Fenris]

I find it depressing that all the grand cabals of this country are squarely in the corner of the right. First off, it isn't fair! Why does the right get to have all of the conspiratorial organizations?

Let's face it, the left doesn't have the caché it once had in terms of massive global programs and espionage operations. Think about the Soviets - at the height of their power, they had the Western industrial world on the run. Think about all of the good Bond movies. Who was Bond fighting (aside from SPECTRE)? The Soviets. All of John le Carré's great novels? The Soviets. Sure, we can get into a pissing match about how the Soviets are unrepresentative of liberalism and the left because of their methods and practices. But hey, you've got to give them props for working for a classless global society. Even if they did use horrible means to achieve it.

Think about all the right-wing conspiracies: the Illuminati, Opus Dei, PNAC, the Masons, the Bildebergers. What do we have? Nothing. Why must there only be conspiracies for the wealthy and elite? Why can't there be a conspiracy, say, for the good of all humanity? Or a living wage? Or more vacation? Or racial harmony?

Well I think we should have one!

We will be known only as VALEWICO (that of course being the first two letters of each word in "vast left wing conspiracy"). Our plan, ladies and gentlemen, is the systematic and democratic overthrow of right-wing governments in America and throughout the world. Through subversive and devious means we shall infuse the legislative agendas of the world with social reforms and improved economic regulations. We shall be the adversary of the corporate anarchists who believe the private sector can rule in place of the public sector. Together, we will defend the workers of the world and see that civil and human rights are enforced!

Who's with me?! Onward agents of VALEWICO!

[skooooo]

1. Ok, I'll join the conspiracy.

Where do I sign up, and where's my badge?

[Fenris]

2. Badges?

We don't need no stinkin' badges!

[skooooo]

25. I knew that was coming..

lol..

[TN al]

4. Fenris has a faster connection than I do...

...What he said. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^

[Raster]

3. COUNT ME IN... Think of all the cool things we can do...

...like NOT bribe politicians.
...encourate religions to stay the hell out of politics.
...work on ending this world poverty thing.
...reintroduce the Geneva Covention Protocols.
...the list just continues...

[WillyT]

5. Damn... I Thought THIS Was It !!!

:shrug::evilgrin::shrug:

[Speck Tater]

6. I WILL NOT join, unless...

... you get a really cool secret handshake. Those are my terms, and I'm sticking to them.

[Philosophy]

12. Here it is

[absolutezero]

7. i'm in

should we try to forge an alliance with the vampire council so that we can access the hollow earth

[Radical Activist]

8. I already started one of those

but I'm doing a reeeeaaally good job of keeping it secret. That's why none of you know about it. hehe :evilgrin:

[Union Thug]

9. Sign me up...Although I think a strong union..

would suit the bill. We need powerful, labor organizations to fight the corporate power. Otherwise, we're pissing into the wind...

So give me the leftist conspiracy we can actually aspire too...There's power in a union... =)

[Marion D]

10. Shouldnt this be organized in smoke-filled rooms

Swept for bugs?

Or perhaps on strolls out in the park?

[no_hypocrisy]

11. Per Groucho: I would never join a club that would have me as a member.

[Fenris]

22. Well, that's a shame, because now we have to kill you.

It's a conspiracy, after all.

[eyesroll]

13. Well, I run the Vast Dairy State Conspiracy.

Can I be a cell?

[Fenris]

20. You can head our Wisconsin operations!

[name not needed]

14. oooooh conspiracy. im in.

[acmavm]

15. Is there going to he an initiation? Will we have a secret handshake?

Any uniforms? How about a clubhouse? Dues?

Let me know.

[qwertyMike]

33. A wet bar?

Do we have a song?

[GOPisEvil]

16. I like the idea.

I think we'll need a catchier name though. That way we'll sound really cool when there's a James Bond movie made about us. :D

[Fenris]

19. I appoint you Chairman of the Committee to Find a Cooler Name

[GOPisEvil]

39. The Committee needs suggestions from the members.

We need a cool name like U.N.C.L.E. or S.P.E.C.T.R.E..

[starroute]

17. Sounds more like superheroes than like conspiracy stuff to me

I mean, conspiracies do things like taking over the world or destroying civilization or corrupting everything that is good and decent. People who just fight the bad guys and defend the helpless are generally known as superheroes. Right?

That's cool too, though. Do we get skin-tight costumes and kooky names?

[Fenris]

18. If you wish

Though, since we're liberal, there's no set rules - we're inclusive. You may be the only person at our super secret meetings in skin-tight spandex and with a name placard that says "Mr. Blue Falcon".

[Zuni]

21. lets do what the VRWC did to Clinton

spread rumors and gossip about Bush on the net (like the one about him getting some hooker an abortion)
undermine the Bush admin at every opportunity by pointing out their many deceits


most of all, we should encourage people to vote and tell them the truth about Kerry's and Bush's records on the issues.

[Fenris]

27. It's a shame Bush has no penis. Otherwise, we'd have a sex scandal.

(NOTE: What proof do I have of W.'s absentee genitalia? None. But lack of evidence didn't stop the right wing from going after Clinton.)

[shance]

23. Do we get a free magazine subscription or a pint of Ben & Jerrys?

actually I could really use a new toaster oven.

<sigh>

Promo items are a BIG selling point for me.


:)

[Fenris]

26. "The Progressive" or "Hustler"

Take your pick. Ben & Jerry are working on a machine that will control the weather.

[UTUSN]

24. Join Me IN, Groucho!!!!!!!!! n/t

28. IM In! I offer my free forums as a base of operations!

I've just opened them, and it is empty and lonely :(

check my link:

http://www.democraticwing.us/forum/index.php

[Fenris]

32. Maybe it's lonely because it doesn't exist. 404, man.

Page not found.

35. Sorry, bad typing does me in

Correct link:

http://www.democraticwing.us/forum/index.php

[bicentennial_baby]

29. Dude I am SO in !

Mmmmmm....conspirimacy....

[Fenris]

31. Indeed. Delicious conspiramacy.

[PartyPooper]

30. As a commie, I'm in!

:evilgrin:

[EstimatedProphet]

34. Let's go one better. Let's create a new country

Let's declare, say, some DUer's house a new country. If we declare it a new country during a finite period of time, say Tuesdays and Thursdays from 3:00 to 5:00, they'll have a devil of a time catching us. And this way we can make a true left-wing government-it just would only function 2 days a week for 2 hours each day. But hey, that doesn't stop our current government...

[regnaD kciN]

36. I'm in!

It'll be a lot better than the half-vast one we have now...

:evilgrin:

[Bhaisahab]

37. I humbly submit my application to lead VALEWICO ops in India :) n/t

[Fenris]

41. HOORAY! Now we're INTERNATIONAL!

[Whitacre D_WI]

38. A conspiracy featuring Fenris...

...is the conspiracy for me!

Where do I sign up?

(I mean, as long as I don't have to listen to "Viva Hate" over and over and over again)

[Fenris]

40. No. We make no demands. Other than total secrecy.

[Whitacre D_WI]

42. But -- by posting here, haven't you just made the VALEWICO public?

:shrug:

[Fenris]

43. I have specially programmed my sig graphic

To transmit Air America at ultrasonic frequencies that, when intercepted by a Freeper's underdeveloped eardrum, causes his or her head to explode.

We have ways of keeping this secret.

[Whitacre D_WI]

44. Three cheers for Fenris!

Hip hip HURRAH!
Hip hip HURRAH!
Hip hip HURRAH!

[indigobusiness]

45. Power to the people!

Badges or no stinkin' badges.........

[Donovanf]

46. Can Fresca be the official drink?

i love that stuff!