What Does Your Voice Mail (Answering Machine) Message Say?

[arwalden]

Is it cute? Serious? Generic? Comical?

Mine is basic and boring. "This is xxx-xxx-xxxx. Please leave a message." (I don't even tell them to wait for the tone. This isn't 1974... by now people should know to wait for the tone before they being speaking.)

However... on reflection, I suppose I should remind people to at LEAST say their names. I'm horrible at voice-print identification and short messages like "Hey! Call me!" are totally useless. LOL.

-- Allen

P.S. In case you're wondering... I don't actually say "x-x-x"... I say my real telephone number in the message.

[lazarus]

1. back when I had a cell phone

the message on it was: "Hi, I'm home right now. If you'll leave a message, I'll call you as soon as I leave."

[arwalden]

2. ROFLMAO! -- Ya Nut! Funny!

Excellent! Thanks for the laugh.

-- Allen

[KissMyAsscroft]

3. Feast your ears..(props to George Costanza)

http://www.ilovewavs.com/comedy/AnsMach/AnsMach%20-%20George%20from%20Seinfeld,%20believe%20it%20or%20not.wav

[lovedems]

4. Mine is "classless".

It is my 3 big boys (taking turns) saying "Hi! You have reached the XXXXX residence, fart, leave a message, toilet, or call us back, poop. Thanks!" (and they finish with a Burp).

They are young and those words are sooooo funny to them. I haven't changed it yet, I am allowing them a few days of laughter before I switch it!

Boys, boys, boys. What is a mother to do? :)

[Dead_Parrot]

5. Well...

I've taken to answering the phone: "I'm too lazy to answer now, but leave a message and I might call you back. Beep."

You'd be amazed....

[MissMillie]

6. "Hi.....

.... You've reached xxx-xxxx. Please leave a message."

[Loonman]

7. Just the phone number

Then the tone.

[moof]

8. You let it ring 20 times to leave a message, get a life

[Robb]

9. "Ready...............GO!!!"

(beep) :)

Amazing how few people are actually ready.

[ThoughtCriminal]

10. Hello?? What??? Can't hear you!

nt

[terrya]

11. "Hello...

"Neither Terry or Jeff can come to the phone right now. But if you want to leave your name, your number and the time that you called, we'll try and get back to you as soon as possible. Thank you"

[pagerbear]

14. Neither Terry NOR Jeff....

Not that I'm a grammar queen or anything.

[terrya]

15. That's probably why we don't get many calls...

People hear the cretinous misuse of grammar on our voicemail and think we're a couple of uneducated louts.

:-)

Terrry

[pagerbear]

17. See what grammar can do for you?

It can make you appear an educated lout!

[trackfan]

12. I say "Please...leave...a...message." in a robotic voice. n/t

[pagerbear]

13. When I was working third shift

...and had the ringer turned off during the day, mine said:

"Hello, this is David _______. Sometimes I do pick up the phone, but clearly this is not one of those times. Please...." blah blah woof woof

You'd amazed how amusing folks found that. Maybe it was the inflection. DUers who've heard my speaking voice, do you think that's it?

[LynneSin]

16. A reminder that you're call my cell phone

and to just leave the basic information. I hate when I get a cell phone message that's like a complete epic novel. I'll call you back to get the details!!

[tjwash]

18. Boring.

Like me...

[trof]

19. "The number you have dialed is not in service...

at this time. Please consult your telephone directory or contact directory informmation."

[arwalden]

20. Heh heh! There's A Shareware Program That Will Do That For You

it's got all the different segments of that famous operator's voice... along with each spoken digit.

You type in your phone number and the wav file is assembled for you on the fly. It even has the three high-pitched bee-Bee-BEEP tones at the beginning.

Funny stuff. (But then again, I'm easily amused.)

-- Allen

[Commendatori]

21. "This is ----. you know the drill." (N/T)