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What is it that drives people to suicide?

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coloradodem2005 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:36 PM
Original message
What is it that drives people to suicide?
I am still thinking of this info. It is ironic. He has been one of my friends who has had to keep me from being depressed. I understand how people feel when they feel like ending it all but what could we do to prevent this from happening? What pushes people over that edge? How can it be prevented?




Suddenly you were gone
From all the lives you left your mark upon. (Neil Peart, 1984)
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indigobusiness Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:38 PM
Response to Original message
1. Life
...nothing more.
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Donating Member ( posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:41 PM
Response to Original message
2. a belief
Edited on Thu Jun-03-04 03:41 PM by 56kid
that things are not going to change for the better.
I'm not trying to be flip. I think that's what it is.
At my most depressed moments, I've always had hope that the next day would change things. If that belief gives out, I think it drives people to suicide.
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havocmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:42 PM
Response to Original message
3. so many private reasons
but personal experience boils it down to absolutely not being able to see any other answer to the blackness.

So sorry for your loss. We never really get over it, do we? We just adjust to the new realities.

And I also feel there is nothing anyone can do to without the cooperation of the party concerned. There are tools and meds and love, but in the end, the individual either feels it will get better, or they just can't see any other end to the pain.

Don't blame any shortcomings you think you may have had that 'let it happen'. You couldn't prevent it without his help.

Peace and strength to you as you remember your friend.
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:43 PM
Response to Original message
4. Lack of the right medication?
:shrug:
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bif Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:48 PM
Response to Reply #4
6. Or refusal to take medication
That's what happened to my mom. She was convinced she had cancer. She went through every test known to man and was in perfect physical health. The doctors wanted to treat her for manic-depression but she wouldn't take any drugs. Se ended up killing herself because I think she didn't think there was any other way.
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indigobusiness Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:55 PM
Response to Reply #4
9. Or, too much
of the wrong.
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Bertha Venation Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:46 PM
Response to Original message
5. with me, it was anger
Of course I didn't do it but I thought about it for years & years, and had a plan. I knew how I'd do it.

I couldn't live as angry and hurt as I was. I wanted not to feel anything.

I'm very sorry about your friend. I wish I could offer you some comfort.
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crossroads Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:51 PM
Response to Original message
7. Pain...
No matter if it is physical, mental, spiritual or emotional. It is all has the same effect, it eventually drives one over the edge when they can't take it any more! If a person reaches out to you for help, IMO you can steer them into counseling, but if they don't reach out, there is nothing you can do in the long run...
:shrug:
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clonebot Donating Member (268 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 03:54 PM
Response to Original message
8. well from a cognitive psychology view
the correlations between suicide and depression are obviously very strong - and depression (according to this theory) is caused by essentially a "filter" in your perceptions that makes everything seem like shit ... so good stuff or okay stuff goes in but your mind organizes it as bad. and it becomes very overwelming at a very deep, cognitive level. sadly, more often than not, when someone actually says they are going to kill themself, they will. pretending to be suicidal for attention is more rare than actually going through with it.
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indigobusiness Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 04:03 PM
Response to Original message
10. Our culture fosters the notion of the "individual"...
There are culures (ie the spice islands) that understand the connectedness of all things...where ideas such as "what's good for you is good for me" prevail...where mental illness, and suicide are unknown.
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moof Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 04:08 PM
Response to Original message
11. Sorry for your loss but glad to see the topic discussed
Edited on Thu Jun-03-04 04:12 PM by moof
It's been said here already but here is a line from a favorite site about it.

“Suicide is not chosen;
it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain.”

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

As for your questions.

"but what could we do to prevent this from happening ? "

Make sure that people you care about, know you care about them and they are not alone because they can always talk to you.

What pushes people over that edge?

Feeling alone, and like no one understands you or feels the same way about anything or life in general.

How can it be prevented ?

Not to put too much blame on religion but personally being to the top of a tall structure at one time the only thing that stopped the call from over the edge being answered was the fact that once the nice freefall was over there would be nothing to experience again ever.

So for this freethinker a lack of faith saved a life.

If any godless christians have trouble imagining their deity they should give imagining " nothing " a try.



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terrya Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 04:29 PM
Response to Original message
12. The feeling that you're completely worthless and that no one cares...
whether you live or die. The knowing that if you were dead tomorrow, no one would care.

I've been there and I've thought about suicide in the past. Many times.
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Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 04:42 PM
Response to Original message
13. I feel very bad for you
In part because I have a friend who has lifted me up when I've been down who is now becoming very depressed and does have some rather difficult circumstances that many people would become sad about. I had received an email from him that caused me to call him up right away because the thought that he might kil himself flashed through my mind. In my case, he didn't , but that thought makes me able to be more empathetic.
I don't know why people kill themselves. Some people are truly alone and that is tragic. Other people don't realize their worth to others. I think that is more tragic. If a person does realize their worth to others and still kills him or herself, that is the most tragic and selfish on their part. What they don't realize is that when they give up on their selves that they also gave up on their loved ones and their loved ones will be hurt by that.
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Harrumph Donating Member (394 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 04:45 PM
Response to Original message
14. My parents!

:smoke:
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galaca1 Donating Member (9 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 04:59 PM
Response to Original message
15. Lots of reasons
Sometimes it is another person that drives a person to suicide. like Sylvia Plath. I think her husband caused her to go over the edge.
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slutticus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Jun-03-04 05:13 PM
Response to Original message
16. It is the inability....
Edited on Thu Jun-03-04 05:17 PM by slutticus
...to cope with your environment. For a depressed person,simple things that wouldn't bother other people seem like a crushing weight on their chest. Simple tasks become like climbing a mountain. Waking up in the morning becomes a chore. Eventually a suicidal person choses not to live. People who are suicidal don't necessarily want to die...they just don't want to live anymore.....that may sound dumb...but there is a difference. It's like choosing the lesser of two evils.

As for prevention, professional help is the best. Depression is a disease just like diabetes or cancer. If left untreated it could be very dangerous to the person. A psychiatrist can help with therapy and/or meds....

On Edit: I just read your previous post...I'm very sorry for your loss. I know my (or anyone else's) simplistic explanation can not possibly ease your pain...
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