A semi-serious question: If you died tomorrow...

[belladonna]

Who would pack up your things, take care of your worldly possessions? And are you now in possession of anything that you wouldn't want said person coming across in the process?

A close call with an idiot driver in one of those monster SUV's made me start thinking about this today, and to be perfectly honest, the very thought of my mother or anyone else finding some of my more, er, personal possessions makes me cringe.

Anyone else ever thought about this one?

[Beaverhausen]

1. my journals...

...forget it. The thought of anyone reading those is too much to think about. But I'll be dead so I probably won't really care. And I hope my loved ones will have the decency to just throw them away.

I only hope someone will take care of my kitties. I guess I should make those plans now...just in case.

[flamingyouth]

2. Sadly, it would probably be my parents

And I don't think they can take much more right now, so I need to stay alive for a while, at least for their sake, if not my own. :D

I'm currently doing this with my husband's stuff, and it's a surreal thing.

[belladonna]

8. I had to do it with my fiance's things

And I think the combination of the close call and a reply I made to Bigbigbear's thread today contributed to all these thoughts today. It is a surreal experience, isn't it? I found myself unwilling to throw away or give away even the smallest, unimportant things.

How are you doing, btw? I've been thinking about you and I hope you're getting all the support you need. Feel free to pm me if you need anything at all :hug:

[flamingyouth]

10. I'm doing okay, I suppose

I had to sign the cremation papers about three hours ago. That was awful, and I fainted in there (how embarrassing). I'm getting lots of support, and I really appreciate your asking about me.

When does it start to get easier? :hug:

[belladonna]

14. I'm glad to hear that you've got plenty of support

Without that, I don't know where I'd be now. It does get easier, but I won't lie to you, it's a long hard road. The one thing that I do want to stress is that you need to let yourself grieve. Don't hold it in to make other people feel better, which is what I did for a very long time. I will tell you the one thing that helped me the most, as silly as it sounds. I wrote letters to him on my really bad days. Weird, I know, but it was cathartic for me in some strange way. Things that I just couldn't say to my family or friends came out in those letters and somehow, it just helped :shrug:

Take care of yourself, and don't be afraid to let others take over some of the responsibility. Again, if you need anything at all, let me know :hug:

[flamingyouth]

21. That is a really good idea

Last night I almost emailed him about this big hive we have in our photinia bush that was being trimmed yesterday. I swear the thing was the size of a small state, and he would have enjoyed seeing it. I think writing him letters sounds like a great plan. Thank you!

I'm taking up all my friends' offers of help now - grocery shopping, cleaning, everything, and it's very nice.

Thanks again for your support.:hug:

[Lefty48197]

35. That's not weird at all.

I haven't experienced a big loss like that, but I'd probably write them letters too.

[LoZoccolo]

3. Yes.

I have.

[HornBuckler]

4. Yeah, I Gotta Couple Rubber Dicks In The Closet

A Few Vibes And A Journal Or Two - But Who Cares? My Folks Probably Do Too - It's All right Ma, It's Life And Life Only

Edit - A Semi-Serious Answer :)

[FranzFerdinand]

5. please let my wife die before me

i don't want her left alone...

[Nikia]

6. My husband would

He is home alone with my stuff as it is and there isn't much if anything that he doesn't know about. If we both died though, like in a car accident, I don't know if I would want either his parents or my parents to come across some stuff.

[Catch22Dem]

7. No

My wife and daughter would have to sift through everything, but I don't have any items that would be embarrassing. Years ago, a different story, but I've tamed myself (or they tamed me) since then.

She knows where the Playboys are. ;)

Keeeeee-Ryste what a morbid thread.

[Droopy]

9. I'm not in possession of anything that

I wouldn't want anybody to see. I guess I have a rather boring private life.

[LiberalVoice]

11. I hope I die last in my family.

I just don't want them to have to go through losing me.

I'm just that wonderful! :)


















That is one hell of a semi-serious answer. I really am wonderful. :P

[belladonna]

17. You are a wonderful person

And I bet you don't have any porn laying around either :evilgrin:

[LiberalVoice]

19. Nope

uh uh.

ummm...uhhh...no.O8)

[belladonna]

23. Just watch out for those lightning strikes, mmmkay?

Be a shame if somebody were to find all that non-existent porn of yours. :D

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

12. My husband

or if we both went to the Beloved together, I guess my brother. The house is always such a mess I doubt if they'd find much of anything, much less anything embaressing!

[SoDesuKa]

13. Nobody Has Any Porn?

Well, it's a good think I don't, either.

[belladonna]

15. Me? Have porn?

Never, and you can't prove that I do either :D

[muriel_volestrangler]

25. Did America get the 'porn buddy' episode of 'Coupling'

before it was cancelled?

[belladonna]

30. I've never seen Coupling

Explain please? :shrug:

[muriel_volestrangler]

36. UK sitcom - Friends with more sex

"Porn buddies" are explained as 2 men who have sworn to rush to each other's house in the event of their death, to remove all incriminating porn before their parents can find it when going through their effects.

This is explained to the girlfriend of one - who assumes the porn is thrown away. "Oh no - you can't waste good porn - you'd keep it in memory of your best friend".

[texas1928]

27. Yeah Right

Can I answer that

[belladonna]

31. No, you most certainly cannot

:spank:

[texas1928]

33. Well I am not going to comment on your post, I have been

Way to close a number of times to this, I died three times in one night. So I have had a long time to think aboutit.

[gpandas]

16. i did for my single brother...

and the sadness of him dying overwhelmed any other thoughts. i wouldn't worry about it too much.

[King Of Paperboys]

18. I just want to die peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather.

Not screaming and yelling, like his passengers.

[Misunderestimator]

20. Oh, I don't have anything to hide...

But if I were to die tomorrow and knew it... I know exactly what I would do in the meantime... :evilgrin:

[belladonna]

24. Hmm, what could that be?

Does it involve the horrible death of lots and lots of innocent kitties? Hmmm?

[Misunderestimator]

28. Well, hopefully not, unless they get in the way.

:evilgrin:

[belladonna]

34. Are you telling me that I didn't HAVE to kill all those poor kitties?

I'm so ashamed, will I ever be forgiven? :cry:

[Misunderestimator]

37. No... never... all you had to do was put them in another room...

sorry to tell you that... :hug:

Lesson learned, I guess. :)

[notadmblnd]

22. My sister

she lives with me. Since my husband died I have paid off all debt except house, put all my assets in a revocable trust. Have had a will, patient advocate and durable power of attorney documents drawn up. She will also be guardian of my child and conservator of my estate.

[gmoney]

26. This was a Man Show skit...

A fake ad for a service that would come to your home when you die and "pre-clean" it to remove embarrassing stuff like porn, dope, moldy food, dirty laundry, etc. and clean up so it's presentable when your family actually shows up to go through your belongs and fight over the lousy Roy Rogers wagon-wheel coffee table!

BTW, The Man Show got cancelled... Rogan and Stanhope were terrible, and apparently lots of other folks agree. It was a mercy killing...

[belladonna]

29. The Man Show cancelled???

Finally, one of my prayers have been answered :bounce:

[Lefty48197]

39. The bad news is that Jimmy Kimmel is free to do other stuff

.

[Lefty48197]

32. Pardon me while I dispose of my porn

. I'd have a field day if I got to go through all my sh*t and didn't have any idea what was in here. I have some pretty cool stuff. I would only hope that they know enough to hold onto certain things, or at least be sure to get a fair value for them.

[BigBigBear]

38. I'm doing that now for my wife n/t

....

[notadmblnd]

42. It's been 8 months

and I still have'nt been able to part, gid rid of, throw/giveaway or dispose of his things. How do you talk yourself into doing it?

[Teddy_Salad]

40. Yeah it scares the hell out of me because.....

everyone would be saying...."Shit! We never realised he was so fucking boring! Well, actually we did but.....not THIS boring."

[texas1928]

41. NO they would be saying

Look at all these dresses, and none of them fit his wife.

[Teddy_Salad]

44. Hey you!

You're right, ya know.

I'd better do something about that. ;)

[texas1928]

45. Well I am going to setup a monitor and the minute I die

My hard drive is going to wipe itself clean.

[belladonna]

43. But what about all those dead kittens piled in your closet?

What would they have to say about those? Hmmm??? :D

[Teddy_Salad]

46. They'd be shocked and the ASPCA wouldn't be too impressed either!

:evilgrin:

[texas1928]

47. Well they can say of both of you

They mastered typing with one hand.

[Teddy_Salad]

48. I already type with one finger....

that yes, comes in very handy at times. :evilgrin:

[texas1928]

49. train it to

Nope will get it blocked.

[Teddy_Salad]

51. Since when has that stopped you before, Tex?

:shrug:

[texas1928]

52. Well don't want to get someone elses thread locked

that would be rude.

[Teddy_Salad]

53. When has that bothered you before, Tex?

Just joking! :evilgrin:

[texas1928]

54. Why I oughta

Pow zoom to the moon Alice.

[arwalden]

50. My Partner Would Do That...

But if we both died together, it would likely be my mom or his sister. They would find all of our porn and toys and have a good old time laughing at it all.

And I hope they do. What will I care? We'll be dead and we won't know about it. They will be upset... perhaps... and I can only imagine the levity of finding erotic playthings might help them to muddle through the rest of the tedious tasks.

Interesting question.

-- Allen

[ScreamingMeemie]

55. I just worry that the house will be a mess. Which is silly, but it's

why I clean like a freak before I take a flight somewhere. Otherwise, I don't think it matters. There is not much to my life.

:hi:

[texas1928]

56. It is that clean drawers syndrome most mothers have

Don't want people to see us messy.

[ScreamingMeemie]

57. Yes! That's the one!

:hi: I freak out about it before every vacation, I mean, what would my mother in law think??? ;)

[texas1928]

58. All I picture is

Mom at the ER saying did he have clean underwear.

Them Yes we found them in the glove compartment.

[Lorien]

59. If it were my dad

who came to clean it out (I doubt if he would) he'd sell what he thought was worth more than a few hundred dollars, and pitch the rest without looking at it (he's not a bad person, just unbelievably lazy). My mom would call a Baptist church in the area and have them take it all away (ugh). I'm sure my cats would find a home with someone; they are very fetching animals (though I doubt that anyone else would spoil them the way I do).

Basically, I wouldn't care-I'd be dead!