When will Phil Jackson leave the Lakers?

[UrbScotty]

Poll question: When will Phil Jackson leave the Lakers?

It's almost 7 AM PDT.

[sniffa]

1. when michaeL jordan

announces he's coming out of retirement to pLay for the charLotte bobcats. phiL jackson wiLL sign on as coach and ink free agents patrick ewing, charLes barkLey, and john stockton in an effort to get them their first rings.

[gratuitous]

3. Naw

Zen master Phil doesn't coach a team unless it has the two best players on the planet. And even then, a championship isn't necessarily a sure thing. He also needs to be in a big media center so that the NBA will get behind his team, and Charlotte isn't it.

Did you see David Stern's interview on ABC last night? When Stuart Scott asked him about the championship residing in the LA media center, Stern had a look cross his face that . . . well, if looks could disembowel, Scott would be using a colostomy bag today. But by the time the question was finished, Stern had control of himself and gave some la-di-da answer.

But you don't see championship banners at Arco Arena or the Rose Garden. Not when the league can hang another one in Chicago or LA.

[THUNDER HANDS]

2. Prediction:

Phil Jackson and Shaq leave the Lakers and head east, to New Jersey.

NJ trades Martin & Jefferson to LA for Shaq.

You heard it here first, people.

[UrbScotty]

4. In three hours, it will be 5:00 PM Pacific Time. (nt)