The "good ole' days"--Did they really exist?

[zanana]

It seems that all of us--from the time we're able to process ideas, are told about the "good ole' days". My mother talked about these days, when kids were sensible, all parents were decent, nobody was obscene and there was no crime. I hear people my age talk about the "good ole' days", too; particularly conservative people. They say people were tough, responsible, patriotic, moral and above all, they didn't complain. I try and try to remember those days, but I must have been in a coma during that time, because the universe I lived in was very different from that. Anyway, here's the question; has there ever been such a thing as "the good ole' days"?

[Kahuna]

1. The good ole days were never the good ole days for all people..

at the same time. The good ole days may have been the good ole days for your mother if she wasn't a working if she wasn't a minority.

[leftyandproud]

2. no question

crime and violence in our culture has soared in the past 40 years..people are a lot less religious today too, especially the youth.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

17. What's bad in the second half of your sentence? (nt)

[Yupster]

3. Probably not, but some things did

When I grew up in Staten Island, NY, the things we did as kids make me wonder today now that I have a kid.

We took off in the morning during summer and were next seen at dinner time. We rode out bikes for miles to play baseball games and go crabbing or swimming. We slept out in the backyard in tents with our friends and walked the neighborhood at 2 am.

This was when our group was 9-12 years old. Looking back we never got into any trouble, and never did anything we should have gotten into trouble for. It really was like the good old days they show on tv.

Today, I have a 7 year old.

I can't imagine kids doing the stuff we were allowed to do. Everyone needs to know where their kids are all the time. Kids sleeping ouside by themselves would be child neglect today (back then no one had air conditioners).

I really do think we've lost something over the last 30-40 years or so.

[ForrestGump]

10. Did they exist? Yes and no.

I agree with you -- there's no doubt that many things have changed for the worse and I firmly believe that much of that perception is not a 'shifting baseline' artefact of my development and accumulated filters (you know how, when revisiting sites or people remembered from childhood, everything seems so much smaller). I grew up in the country, for the most part, but whether there or in the 'burbs my kidhood was also marked by an extreme freedom that I just can't believe that kids today could ever know.

Sure, where I grew up was definitely a pretty placid place (a rare murder, for example, was at that time -- but not these days -- big news for many, many years) but bad things have always happened all over the place and I know that if I had a child I wouldn't allow them such free rein...well, certainly unless I lived in one of a few places that I can think of that might still exist in a time warp in this respect. It wasn't that my parents weren't responsible, either, it's just that the time and place was so radically different and I seriously doubt that I would have developed the same interests (career included) if I were as closeted and 'protected' as would be prudent in many of today's communities, certainly urbanized ones. I was out in ther bush and away on the water all day, often without even telling my parents, and going on a multiday hike with my best friend was not even blinked at.

This was not the '40s or '50s that I'm talking about, either, but the '70s. We used to go away on long vacations and leave the doors unlocked -- people I now know from megalopolis LA also did so during the same time, unbelievably enough -- but that's not really sane behavior for most of us these days.

Things have changed and, advances in medicine and technology and certain social and environmental improvements aside, much has changed for the worse. Drugs in schools, guns in schools...this stuff just didn't happen before, and since the '80s it's been happening among younger and younger kids.

On the other hand, yes, it's very easy to romanticize the 'old days.' Or, perhaps more accurately, the days that are anything but these days, future included. Also, I think it's more than possible that being a kid is almost always going to be inherently more pleasant and carefree than being an adult -- all else aside, the emotional battering that many of us receive (romantic and otherwise) combines with fiscal concern and "what am I doing with my life" to make memories of childhood a very attractive refuge. I know that I would definitely rather be ten or eleven right now, if everything could be as it was then.

As always, I think the truth's somewhere in the middle, exact position depending upon the individual and where and when they grew up.

[tigereye]

13. sounds like my small town upbringing in PA

yes it was better in some ways and worse in some. Wish I were raising my child in that environment, where things seemed more stable and safer... but I can't live in a small town, I am too used to the city. So.

[Yupster]

14. But I grew up in New York City

(although Staten Island had a much smaller population back then.)

I heard Tim Russert talking about his upbringing on his book tour and it sounded very similar to mine.

I have no doubt we've lost something, probably for good. I fear many young people can't even understand the way I, and probably millions of others grew up. It was an incredible sense of freedom that has been lost.

I have no doubt that some of it may have been ignorance. Kids probably did get abducted and killed, but it wasn't on the news all day, so people weren't worried about it. Today it seems we have to be worried about everything, some things statistically real, and some statistically negligible.

[tigereye]

19. that's what was funny because I grew up in a very small town

... and your story sounded very like mine, anyway! I think people are too protective of their kids now ( and in SOME ways this is justified) and want to protect and control every aspect of their lives, to the point that they get very little freedom. Although I do think that there are plenty of kids who do still have some of this freedom in small towns and suburbs around America.

[tridim]

4. Yea, the 90's

The new "good ole days". They seem like ancient history after the last 4 years.

[tjwash]

5. Yeah, let's take the way back machine to the "good old days" of 1964.

We were coming fresh off the heels of McCarthyism, and Hollywood blacklisting, the FBI had files on just about everyone they considered a threat, fresh faced young kids, who did not have rich connections were being shipped off to be cannon fodder in Vietnam, blacks were still being lynched and beaten to death in the south for looking at white women for two seconds. Anyone remember these:



Yeah, the good old days my fucking ass...

[TreasonousBastard]

6. For 5,000 years of recorded human history...

people have been pining for "the good 'ol days."

Somehow, though, they never want to give up the good stuff of the present for what they remember from the past.

It's just change, and we do lose good things from the past, but so what?

(Unless we manage to turn the planet into a wasteland)

[madrchsod]

7. no

amazing enough things do get better over time..even the current crap we are in now will swing back the other way someday..as for the rest -when i was a kid there were red signs on peoples doors because of illness we don`t have today-polio was the fear in every parents minds and the list goes on and on..screw the "good old days". live for the now and have faith in the future..

[Nikia]

8. My hometown Ohio had better days

My hometown had better days in the past. It used to be a very rich prosperous town. You can know this even if you did not know its past just by driving through town. When I hear people talk about the small, not so nice houses of the past, I find that it doesn't match my experience. Many houses there are large and nice if they are kept in good repair. It was one of the first cities wired for electricity. It had many local owned factories in its early days. When my grandparents were my age, it had a very propserous downtown with a nice hotel and high end department stores.
I am not sure when the change occurred. I know that the census showed a significant population declined from 1970 to 1980. From my great grandfather's letters to many U.S. reps, Senators, and the president, unemployment sky rocketed in the 1970's and early 1980's. I know at least one large factory closed around 1980. That didn't keep them from building a mall on the edge of town though. That created trouble downtown, of course, but stores came back to the downtown mall when leaders of the city persuaded the local owners of the building to severely cut their rents.
I grew up in the 1980's. Both my families were locally political. I watched as factories and stores closed. I knew that the stores that took their place were not the high quality shops that we were used to. I knew that the few factories that opened in their place paid less than half the wage that the closed factories paid. I watched the factories lose their local ownership and the local owners and executives who were left moved miles out of town or even to nearby more prosperous cities. We watched as the community clubs declined. We watched as our school levies were defeated for the first time and then most of the time until they threatened to cut sports. We watched as the richest people in town were over 60. I saw as the general climate of the town went from solid middle class to lower working class.
Now I am away from the town where I grew up. I read the local paper online. The tax base is pitiful. There are people donating to keep the city pool open and the fireworks display. They built a new stadium at the high school, financed with private donations. They are laying off a good portion of the workforce at a local factory, one of the larger employers, one that paid well, despite the fact that they've been increasing production. Most of the factory jobs at the few newer plants who have been attracted "Due to the areas superior workforce" (the newspaper's words), pay around $8.00/hour. No one votes for tax increases for anything. At a public forum, they urge the city to give themselves pay cuts, just as everyone has experienced pay cuts.
The good old days of the city of my birth are past. I think that they have a right to be upset. They all believed that hard work, community spirit, and good moral values would bring them prosperity as it did for 100 year or more. It didn't save them and now they are giving up.

[Solly Mack]

9. No

memories of long ago are seen through the filter of life's experiences...both good and bad. During bad times people cling to the notion that the past somehow held all things good. During good times, they tend to look forward.

No fast rule, of course.

[ScreamingMeemie]

11. The past becomes good when looked upon from the present.

Yes, I look back and miss some of the 80's and yet it was the most miserable time period in my existance. Yet, looking back I forget the time at age 13 when I almost took my own life because of difficult times at school. I forget the arguments of my parents. My daughter loves all things 80's and brings back the good times for me. The Wham!, Thompson Twins, big hair good...which really wasn't all that good when I peel off the layers. Which most of us never do, making those "old days" seem all the more good. :hi:

[richmwill]

12. "Good Ole Days"

The Great Depression. Adolph Hitler. Racism and lynchings. Teachers having permission to beat children in school. Disabled and mentally-challenged children placed in institutions "for their own good". Unwed mothers shunned from society (and in the case of my aunt, not given any pain relief during childbirth in a Catholic hospital as penance for her "sinful decision").

Yeah.. sure sounds like "Good Ole Days", right? And I haven't even touched the 60's yet.

[put out]

16. I'll do it for you, hoping for clarity not fogged by time.

Girls sent to public school wearing dresses and skirts in freezing weather. Pants not allowed for girls, and if your mom insisted, you had to hustle to the coat room to get them off quick before you got in trouble. Married women denied birth control at the whim of courts, physicians, and pharmacists, and only "given" birth control with the consent of husbands.

Sitting in front of the television, transfixed by images of horror in Vietnam. Waiting to see whether my brother's or brother in law's number would be drawn. Listening to my sister bite her nails looking at the lottery.

My mother providing training to a younger, male, prospective executive. She showed him how to do his job; he did not have the ability to do hers. Then he was her boss and hated her.

A beloved minister who deigned to visit our Sunday School class and lecture us about SEX IS WRONG. And talked at length about short skirts would lead good boys astray.

Playing in a creek that had soapy scum and what was probably shit in it, benefits of uncontrolled and unregulated development.

Huge cars with no seat belts. Standing up in the back seat of a moving car. Knowing some of my friends were being hit hard by their parents, listening to them cry and knowing they would be hit harder for having told.

You can have the good old days. They were not so good for many people.

[HawkerHurricane]

15. Back to the good old days?

Children nowadays are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food and tyrannise their teachers.
Socrates , 400 BCE

[name not needed]

18. Only for people who lived through such days,

but were too young to remember much of it. Anyone who pines for the good ol' days of the 50's is either a Repuke or was born in 1957.

[SoCalDem]

20. Good Old days exist for everyone..they are in your Brain

Until you are about 10 years old, you have no real appreciation of things around you.. Your family is your whole world.. But, there is a window of time...10-18 roughly.,. This is the time when you begin to break away from your immediate family, and discover the world.. You learn that everyone does NOT do things the way your family does.. It's an exciting time, and these adventurous events burn themselves into your psyche.. These are the events that turn you into who you eventually become..


This 8 year period is the ONLY time in your life where you truly are "taken care" of and "supported".. (The time before those years , you are supported too, but you have NO freedom during those years.. You are merely an extension of your parents..)

Everything you need is provided for you and you can wallow in narcissism.. Your mind can wander, everything is new and exciting, and there is little expected of you , other than cleaning your room, or maybe mowing the lawn.. Your parents shield you from the harsh realities of life.. If you want something, there is usually someone in your life who will make it their goal to see that you get it..

The memories of these years are sweet, and they are permanent. The ugly things that happen during those years, are there as well, but there are so many "firsts", and so much fun associated with those years, that it's hard , later in life to NOT see them as the good old days..

After one gets into college or the "real world", things are expected of you.. You have to make your own way, pay for your own mistakes.. Life is suddenly difficult and the harder life gets in the NOW, the better things look in the "BACK THEN"..

Even kids who were abused, or raised as poor kids, often look back at their childhoods, and find that they block out the bad, and still remember the good..

[Bonhomme Richard]

21. As the song say's "These are....the Good Old Days" n/t

[FlaGranny]

22. When I was a kid back in the 40's and 50's, it

SEEMED that way. I think a lot of the feelings of security back then had to do with the way news was reported. There was only a half hour of it and most bad things happened to someone else far away. I have a feeling that things were not that different. Most people got their news from the newspapers then and I think that also made the news less "personal" and less sensational.

Edit: I went back and read the rest of the posts and I agree that kids were a lot more free back then. I can relate to kids being out all day long and not coming in until dinnertime. That's the way my childhood was. But even back then, there were child molesters around. Twice, when I was between 8 and 10 years old, I had what to me were old men try to coax me into their cars (one time it was a new Cadillac). Fortunately, I had more sense than that.