a few jokes...laugh a little, things are way too serious

[russian33]

MIX-UP
Mr. Smith goes to the doctor's office to collect his wife's test results. The lab technician says, "I'm sorry, sir, but there has been a bit of a mix-up and we have a problem. When we sent the samples from your wife to the lab, the samples from another Mrs. Smith were sent as well and we are now uncertain which one is your wife's. Frankly, it is either bad news or terrible news!" "What do you mean?" said Mr. Smith. "Well, one Mrs. Smith tested positive for Alzheimers, and the other tested positive for AIDS. We can't tell which is your wife's test." "That's terrible!" said Mr. Smith. "Can we do the test over?" "Normally, yes. But you have Blue Cross Health Care, and they won't pay for these expensive tests more than once." "Well, what am I supposed to do now?" said Mr. Smith. "Blue Cross Health Care recommends that you drop your wife off in the middle of town. If she finds her way home, don't sleep with her."

KIDS
Q: How many kids with Attention Deficit Disorder does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Let's go ride bikes!

LIGHTBULB
Q: How many perverts does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Just one, but it takes a surgical team to get it out.

WHO AM I
One Monday morning, a mailman is walking the neighborhood on his usual route. As he approaches one of the homes, Bob the homeowner is coming out with a load of empty beer and liquor bottles. "Wow, Bob, looks like you guys had a hell of a party this weekend," the mailman comments. Bob replies, "We had about 15 couples from around the neighborhood over and things got a bit wild. We got so drunk that we started playing 'Who Am I?'" The mailman says, "How do you play that?" Bob continues, "Well, all the guys go in the bedroom and we come out one at a time with a sheet covering us, with only our units showing through a hole in the sheet. Then the women try to guess who it is." The mailman laughs and says, "I'm sorry I missed that." "Probably a good thing you did," Bob responds, "Your name was guessed four or five times."