An old and dear friend just told me she has breast cancer.

[NightTrain]

...I met her several years ago through a Usenet group. We've also met in person a number of times. I just got this e-mail from her:

<<Dean, I don't know if anyone told you, but I have an awful problem in my life right now--advanced breast cancer. This is why I post sporadically, forget to listen to your show, etc. I'm undergoing chemotherapy (a euphemism for *being poisoned not quite enough to kill you*) which makes me terribly sick, and all my hair has fallen out (cue up Professor Longhair). The tumor was so large that I have to have chemo to shrink it before I can even have surgery. And I have no choice as far as the surgery is concerned, I have to have a mastectomy. Then after that, radiation, and more chemo, and if I survive all that, 5 years of taking Tamoxifen, and limited use of my right arm for the rest of my life. True, I'm left-handed, but my job as you know requires lifting--with both arms--so I don't know where all this is going to leave me. Hopefully though, it will leave me alive. I don't want to die. I passionately don't want to die.>>

Fortunately, this person lives only a couple of hours from me, in New York City. I think I oughta pay her a visit ASAP!

[IdaBriggs]

1. Best Wishes to Her!

Keeping ALL of you in our prayers...Ida

[jeff30997]

2. Huh...

You don't seem to take all that pretty seriously.

[NightTrain]

5. Say what?

:shrug:

[fudge stripe cookays]

6. And you got that where?

What an insensitive thing to say.

I'm sure she'd love a visit, NightTrain.

I'll be thinking of both of you. Hopefully your friend is a strong lady and can make it through this.

FSC

[niyad]

3. go see her immediately, and know that all of you are in my prayers. I

know how difficult this is going to be for her, and those who care about her. One of my dearest friends also has cancer, and it is metastisizing. we keep praying.

[NightTrain]

9. I wish I *could* go see her immediately!

I wish she had told me about her breast cancer before now. I just spent the last five weeks unemployed, getting weekly severance checks, and with plenty of time on my hands. Getting down to NYC would've been no problem at all.

But tomorrow, I start a new job, whose workweek is 45 hours spread out over 5-1/2 days. Christ only knows when I'll have time to drive to New York now!

[flamingyouth]

4. I'll keep positive thoughts going for her

And I bet getting a visit from you would really lift her spirits right now - that is a great idea!

[Bunny]

7. Well, it sounds serious, but I'll send some vibes her way.

Go see her right away if you can. Sounds like she needs a friend.

[Spinzonner]

8. Maybe, but ...

Don't surprise her.

The treatments are physically taxing and draining and she may not be up to visitors, at all or at some times and she's almost certainly not up to 'entertaining' visitors (though I'm shure you don't expect such).

Talk to her about it first and make sure you do all the work, if any.

But, I'm sure you'd realize that.

[knitter4democracy]

10. If she's taking Tamoxifen, there's hope

The worst breast cancers react badly (or not at all) to Tamoxifen, so there's hope. My MIL was diagnosed with Stage III breast cancer and cannot take the drug because she has the wrong kind. So far, so good, but we pray daily. A visit would be a good thing, just be prepared for her exhaustion. Can you take her some dinner? She won't feel like eating, but she needs to in order to keep up her strength. I'd call and ask her what she wants and what she can keep down.