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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:37 PM
Original message
Is 14 too young to know your sexuality?
Edited on Mon Aug-16-04 02:53 PM by LiberalManiacfromOC
I think I might be bisexual because of dreams and stuff like that. Are my hormones tricking me?


On edit: I just want to make it clear that I don't care if I'm bisexual at all.
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Worst Username Ever Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:39 PM
Response to Original message
1. If you are really a minor, then I am not touching that question with
10 ft pole.
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WMliberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:13 PM
Response to Reply #1
34. ditto!
I wouldn't touch that one with shylock's "10 foot pole."
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JohnKleeb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:40 PM
Response to Original message
2. hmmm
When I was 14 I knew I was hetero, just saying, always been attracted to the opposite sex. So I say yeah its possible but any thing can happen between now and 18, I know for one at that age didnt know I had a small feminite side, very smsll but its there.
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:40 PM
Response to Original message
3. Just enjoy your teen years
And don't dwell on those things. You'll know better in your 20's.

The biggest problem anyone ever does in their teen years is overthink things....
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JohnKleeb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:42 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. aint that the truth
I think too much I think, though as I said I did know at that age, I was around 14 when my dad bought me a best of the swimsuit models, I really liked Paulina Porzikova, mmmm Czech girls heh, sorry.
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Bertha Venation Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:42 PM
Response to Reply #3
5. EXCELLENT ANSWER
Listen to Taverner, Young One. :)
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:43 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. Great advice!
Relax, don't sweat it. It may change and it will develop. Whatever it is it will be.
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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:43 PM
Response to Reply #3
8. Oh, I honestly don't care what sexuality I am
I just felt like bringing it up because of the dreams I've been having for the past two weeks. My hormones and I don't get along you see, and I think they might be up to something.


I do think too much though.
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:48 PM
Response to Reply #8
17. Well relax and enjoy the dreams
Whichever direction they may lead.
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papau Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:58 PM
Response to Reply #3
25. True - even the CIA/NSA do not consider sex experienced before 17
At least that is the protocol for the start of the process of getting a top top secret clearance (the dozen levels of top secret seem to have become 300 levels these days - and I do not know what current procedures are - the above is based on when I got my clearance out of college - long, long, ago! :-) )

:-)
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benburch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:43 PM
Response to Original message
7. I knew then.
But just be patient with yourself.
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Dookus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:43 PM
Response to Original message
9. No
14 is not too young, but I wouldn't use dreams as a deciding factor. I've dreamt I can fly, but it didn't mean I was a pelican.

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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:46 PM
Response to Reply #9
12. It's more than just dreams
and I don't just mean regular dreams..... ahem
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Moonbeam_Starlight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:47 PM
Response to Reply #9
15. First DU
laugh out loud moment of the day for me, right there. And it's always YOU, isn't it?

You think you are funny or something, don't you Dookus?

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exJW Donating Member (309 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:45 PM
Response to Original message
10. Yes. No. Maybe.
Everyone is different.
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iconoclastic cat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:46 PM
Response to Original message
11. Seriously: Stop freaking yourself out.
Yesterday, it was a crisis about the misogyny of your classmates. Now it's your sexuality. Relax, dammit! Or at least start a band and channel this anxiety into writing some good music.

Here, how about this: Human sexuality exists on a continuum; it shifts in response to a multitude of factors.

How about this: Like who you like. If they like you back, great. If not, go back to step one (and start a band).

Don't you have homework to do? </joke>
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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:47 PM
Response to Reply #11
16. I'm not freaked out....
I was just wondering. Unlike most people my age (well, actually most people) I don't care about my sexuality.
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tridim Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:46 PM
Response to Original message
13. Have you viewed bisexual porn?
If so, that might be influencing your dreams a bit. When I was 14, all my hormone enhanced dreams were heterosexual, but that was well before the Internet became a porno-mart. I was just happy to have one or two Playboys back then.
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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:51 PM
Response to Reply #13
21. no I haven't
These dreams started right before I left for a two week backpacking trip and have been continuing throughout it and up until today.
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Placebo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:47 PM
Response to Original message
14. I knew at 14...
but hell, I lost my virginity to a boy at 13.

You definitely CAN know and for some of us like me there was never really any doubt.

Although the fact that you cried during Obama's speech could be a red flag....sissy. :P
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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:50 PM
Response to Reply #14
18. Hey I'm a LIBERAL, not a sissy!!!!!
:P


well, actually, I'm just a political crybaby. :D
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Ready4Change Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:50 PM
Response to Original message
19. Guess what?
No one else can tell you. It's entirely a personal discovery, and the LAST person you should listen to is someone who tried to tell you "what you are."

Some people know by your age. Some don't know until later in life. If you're not sure, don't worry about it, and certainly don't try to force yourself into some mold. You'll find out at the time that's right for you, and that's all that matters.
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:51 PM
Response to Original message
20. I knew I was hetero when I was 13 at the onset of puberty
But sexuality isn't always clear cut and I've had dreams about homosexuality in the past and I still do occasionaly. I think it's a part of human nature. But in my conscious life I am definitely hetero.

Teenage years are very topsy turvy and your body and mind are going through and will go through many changes. I agree with another poster in that you should give yourself some time. It will sort itself out.
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pagerbear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:53 PM
Response to Original message
22. I knew at 14
...but that doesn't mean everyone does. My suggestion--take the advice of those who say relax and let it be. No one has to fit into any one category, or even remain in any one category from one day to the next. That goes for grownups as well as teenagers.

Am I making sense or just rambling?
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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:54 PM
Response to Reply #22
23. No, it makes sense
being a teen is just weird
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Wickerman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:59 PM
Response to Reply #23
26. Cheer up
being an adult is even weirder - the only difference is that folks are less tolerant of your mistakes!

Go with the flow, don't worry about the little stuff, just enjoy it all - when you look back in 20 years you will be humbled by the amount of time you spent worrying about silly shit.

Oh, and the best advice I've seen in this forum - start a band - wish to hell I would've done that.
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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:03 PM
Response to Reply #26
27. But i don't have musical talent... only thinking talent and running talent
that's why I'm on DU :D
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Wickerman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:06 PM
Response to Reply #27
29. Hey, some of my favorite bands
were severely deficit in talent - they made up for it in energy, agnst and expression.

Or, stick with running - run hard.
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LiberalManiacfromOC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:08 PM
Response to Reply #29
32. well, that works.
Although running seems fine with me. I might make the varsity team as a freshman.
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slinkerwink Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 02:57 PM
Response to Original message
24. no, I knew I was bi when I was 13
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nini Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:05 PM
Response to Original message
28. Sounds more like you're coming into your sexuality in general
and are quite normal. You'll know for sure over the next few years. In the mean time just enjoy this time of your life and go with the flow.






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soothsayer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:08 PM
Response to Original message
30. Seems like I knew FOREVER. Much younger than 14. altho it was more
romantic longing than it was sexual in any way. That never occurred to me until my first girlfriend at age 14. And even then, if it weren't for her, I think it would have taken me a while to figure out the possibilities. Who knew? All I wanted to do was to DATE girls, maybe MARRY girls, but the details were always really sketchy.
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jukes Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:08 PM
Response to Original message
31. LiberalManiacfromOC
maybe/maybe not. i think every1 thinks about that at some time or other. i think you'll stumble on the answer in time, & you won't know for sure till then.

it's ok to ponder things like that; that's what growing up IS. just don't get fixated; the question's going to resolve itself soon enough.
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Placebo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:10 PM
Response to Original message
33. Just make sure when you hit 18...
that you give me a call!

:loveya: :P
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GoddessOfGuinness Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:21 PM
Response to Original message
35. 30 years ago, you'd have been wondering
what was wrong with you. Clearly we have miles to go with regard to accepting non-heterosexuality; but I think the fact that you aren't ashamed by your dreams speaks volumes for how far we've come.

The fact that you're having bisexual dreams is not an indicator of your sexuality. It's most likely a reflection of your wondering whether you're bisexual or not. And while "You'll find out in time...be patient with yourself" is rarely the advice a 14 year old wants to hear; it really is the best advice.

:hug:
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Q3JR4 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:36 PM
Response to Original message
36. I knew earlier than that (13).
I remember having more fun looking at other boys than I did the girls.

But, as has been posted here, it's still better to give it time. You don't have to come up with a category for yourself to fit in until later (maybe never).

Just do your own thing the answers will come in time.
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Beer Snob-50 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 03:41 PM
Response to Original message
37. i knew at 12 or 13
when I saw kim casagrande walk into the classroom.
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TrogL Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 04:14 PM
Response to Original message
38. I had suspicions at 12 but wasn't sure 'til I was 30
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 04:24 PM
Response to Original message
39. the time of realization is different for eveyrone.
i knew i was straight in my early teens... but sometimes people have to go through 2 marriges and be elected governor before they find out for sure. lol that was bad, im sorry.

enjoy your teens, no matter where they lead you.

-LK
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miss_kitty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-16-04 04:44 PM
Response to Original message
40. sexuality?
heck no i knew i was straight at 14! kidding aside, a lot of my gay friends knew when they were younger than 14; other friends of mine were conflicted until they got older. i have heard many moms say," i knew when he/she was 5" or 4. i have have one friend who came out to her family as an adult and the general reaction was "we wondered when you were going to tell us."
i am a firm believer in there being many shades of sexuality, from 100% gay to 100% straight. you'll figure out where your sentiments lie.
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