When the Rapture comes and Jesus returns...

[MrScorpio]

I've got dibs on Pat Robertson's mansion in Virginia Beach.

And you're all invited for a party!!!!

:party: :nuke: :party:

[tandot]

1. come rapture...can I have your car?

bumper sticker I saw... :evilgrin:

[MrScorpio]

2. You mean Pat's car?

I'm sticking around. If you come to the party, you may get a nice present

[tandot]

8. Pat's car, of course. As a Democrat, I don't know if your car is better

or newer than mine ;)

Most of those Republican hypocrites drive those fancy and expensive cars...

[MrScorpio]

No way my car is better than Pat's

He's probably tooling around in a brand new Caddy. Got me drooling already.

[joefree1]

3. "No-Judgment Day is coming"

Saw that sticker the other day.

[Wickerman]

4. I want Oral Roberts University

with that cool glass building parked right on that there duck pond? Sweet!

[guitar man]

23. I would get creative

Make the big praying hands at ORU flip the bird!

[Cyrano]

5. Anyone who wants dibs on the Crawford ranch

better be prepared to clear a lot of brush (whatever that is).

[MrScorpio]

6. Anybody want a tv studio?

I hear CBN has a nice one

[MikeG]

7. Look. Jesus Shaves!

[MrScorpio]

9. I can see Mel Gibson and Stephen Baldwin taking Jesus out for a beer

and Jesus would be all over their cases for their choice of movies roles.

"...And you guys were naked on screen for how many times?"

[redqueen]

10. That crap was all made up recently, you know

How does this kind of stuff catch on so well?

[MrScorpio]

11. Dudess, Don't burst my bubble

Can't you see that I'm jonesin' for Pat's fancy shack?

[redqueen]

12. But it's probably all polluted with his vileness

I'd rather live in a haunted house, m'self.

[MrScorpio]

13. Then what we need is a party!!!

Bring along some Wiccas and Pagans and we'll do some spiritual purifying.

No need to let a perfectly good multi-million dollar mansion go to waste.

[redqueen]

14. Maybe that could work

Either way it'd be a helluva party. :D

[WoodrowFan]

18. bring some Christians too

it's not like any REAL ones have ever been there (well, maybe some of his servants)

[MrScorpio]

19. Now why would you want to spoil the party?

Keep those partypoopers out.

[WoodrowFan]

20. just for that

I'm not sharing any porn I find... unless he likes, like clown porn or something... ewwwwwwwwwwwww

[MrScorpio]

22. Yeah, Clown porn

That would be a buzzkill

[WoodrowFan]

15. I bet there's a TON of porn

I bet there's a TON of porn in the closet..

[redqueen]

16. Yeah

but it's probably really scary stuff!

:scared:

[MrScorpio]

17. I've got the popcorn

I've been to Amsterdam. Pat's porn doesn't scare me.

[skygazer]

21. Jesus has already returned

They're holding him in Gitmo on suspicion of being a terrorist.

Seriously, think about it - would anyone recognize Jesus if he returned? Wouldn't people just say, "Freak. Thinks he's Jesus. What a loser."

[baldguy]

24. When the Rapture comes and Jesus returns...

All the "Born Again" nut cases will be left behind - whining with their jaws hanging open.

All the open-minded, hippie-dippy, bleeding-heart liberals who have been most compassionate and accepting of others will have been "taken up" - whether or not they believe, Jesus will view them as fellow travelers.

[FreakinDJ]

25. He will smite Bush down for using his name