The "emeror's new clothes" thread for those who think the Beach Boys...

[CanuckAmok]

...are gods, or that Brian Wilson is a musical genius, and so forth.

Okay, now hear this:

The Beach Boys are a menudo-esque proto-pop band who managed to pen a handful of catchy songs about things they really didn't know much about. None of them surfed, and at least one of them couldn't even swim.

Brian Wilson is not now, nor has he ever been, a musical genius. Here's what Brian Wilson is: an over-induldged, neurotic has-been, whose fifteen minutes have been extended ad infinitum by a Baby-Boomer controlled pop culture who cling to the Beach Boys as representitive of everything that was perfect about "their generation", and by soul-less madison Avenue mercenaries who recycle and regurgitate this myopic, clean-cut, everybody loves everything world personified by the Beach Boys in order to sell poorly-manufactured, wholly unnecessary, and usuriously marked-up crap we don't need.

For ten plus years, I've been hearing about how Pet Sounds and Smile are the best albums ever, and so forth. They are not.

I bet you that this whole "musica genius" rumour was started by some esoteric and inaccessible cultural critic, in an obscure article, to see if the public are as impressionable as he thinks we are. That same critic is probably working on similarly themed articles called "Joe Esterhaus: Welles of the 21st Century", and "The Pontiac Aztek: People Didn't Get It, Because They're Fucking Morons who don't Appreciate the Complexities of Industrial Design"

Just for the record, the best albums ever are (in no particular order):

Revolver, by the Beatles
Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band, by the Beatles
Skylarking, by XTC
I Crush Bozo, by The Happy Flowers
Fire of Love, by the Gun Club
Never Mind the Bollocks, by the Sex Pistols
Avoid Freud, by Rough Trade
Ocean Rain, by Echo and the Bunnymen
10,000 Htz Ledgend, by Air
Q: Are We Not Men..., by Devo
Making History, by Linton Kwesi Johnson
Nail, by Scraping Foetus off the Wheel
Rocket to Russia, by the Ramones
Ride the Lightning, by Metallica
Tabula Rasa, by Einsturzende Neubauten
Damaged, by Black Flag
Overnite Sensation, byt Frank Zappa/Mothers
Murder Ballads, by Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds
Look Sharp!, by Joe Jackson
and
Madonna, by ...Trail of Dead

So, let's forget about this Wilson hack, okay?

Thanks!

on edit: Trust, by Elvis Costello/Attractions
Exodus, by Bob Marley/Wailers

further edit: What's Goin' On, by Marvin Gaye

[JVS]

1. TESTIFY MY RIGHTEOUS BROTHER!!! PREACH THE TRUTH!

[regnaD kciN]

2. Interesting that you lead off with two Beatles albums...

...since Paul McCartney is on record (pun not intended) as holding that "Pet Sounds" is one of the greatest albums ever. Might Paul be "the esoteric and inaccessible cultural critic, in an obscure article, to see if the public are as impressionable as he thinks we are" you're thinking of? :eyes:

And, besides, concerning your insistence that "Smile" is not that good: it's kind of hard to tell, since it's never been released.

[CanuckAmok]

3. See! He's the lamest Beatle! Point proven!!

n/t

[regnaD kciN]

5. The only "point proven"...

...is the one on top of your head.

[JVS]

9. It's one of those holywood conspiracies

One night all the bigshots and famous people were together snorting coke off of expensive hookers' asses amd they turned to each other and said "Let's all act as though the Beach Boys are musical geniuses and watch the poor saps who buy our records with their hard earned money believe us even though we all know that th BB's suck. The stupid peasants will fall for it and we'll all have a good chuckle"

[BlueJazz]

4. I agree with much of what you say ...BUT.....

..I can think of tons of hard-core jazz albums that would blow most of your "Top Albums" off the stage...

[CanuckAmok]

10. I was going to include some Jazz, but didn't...

So herea are a smattering of amazing Jazz albums to add to my list:

Relaxin' with the Miles Davis Quintet
Better Git it in Your Soul, Charles Mingus
anything by John Coltrane
Spy vs. Spy, by John Zorn
Buy, by the Contortions
Live at Carnegie Hall, by Glen Miller and his Orchestra
anything by Horace Silver

[BlueJazz]

19. Excellent! :)

[emulatorloo]

6. Brian is John, Paul, and George Martin rolled into one

I respond to your flamebait, and tell you that Brian wrote the songs, arranged every note of the instrumentation and vocals, and produced the records. The Beach Boys challenged the Beatles to do some of their greatest work. . .Read what McCartney has to say about Brian's influence on him.

[TroubleMan]

7. A list of best albums ever - but you didn't include What's Going On?

You missed one of the most important political statement albums ever, not to mention the extremely high quality of music on it...but you included Devo and Madonna?

Oh well....each to his own.

(on edit) I agree with you about The Beach Boys to a certain extent....but you know NightTrain's gonna have some comment on this.

[CanuckAmok]

11. Not "Madonna", the album "Madonna", by ...Trail of Dead.

And What's Goin' On should have been on my list. edit forthcoming.

[TroubleMan]

12. Oops....I was reading too fast

nt.

[DenverDem]

8. Subjective judgement.

My subjective judgement, you don't know what you are talking about.

From a music theory point of view, Brian's compositions and use of complex harmonic singing is very advanced and will stand the test of time so that a hundred years from now people will still be listening to and studying Beach Boys music and only a couple of your favorite albums will still be remembered.

But that's my subjective judgment, mine and a few million other people's, we could all be wrong. I don't, however, think so.

The members of The Beatles felt that Pet Sounds was THE BEST album ever made up to that time, and it was the inspiration for them to acheive the greatness of Sgt. Peppers.

[Catch22Dem]

13. I couldn't agree more (n/t)

[Stew225]

22. You know it's all subjective, espcially when it comes

to an art form such as music! I would suggest that your age--plus an obvious inherent disdain for baby boomers---might influence your dislike of the Beach Boys.

The Beach Boys had an enormous positive influence on the sixties and beyond. A large part of that influence was due to their music which some, including the Beatles, thought was pretty good.

[Catch22Dem]

28. When you say "your"

You're not talking about me are you? I was agreeing with th poster who thought the Beach Boys were great.

[DenverDem]

41. He's referring back to the OP.

You are being supported.

[shadu]

26. "Pet Sounds" is moldy moldy moldy

The songs are shit. Wake up wake up wake up

[DenverDem]

40. You are an idiot.

Your taste is shit. Shut up shut up shut up.

[Old and In the Way]

14. But how could your list be the best ever if I haven't heard 3/4 of them?

Sorry, in best ever lists, your's ranks 2,456,878th.

:-)

[CanuckAmok]

15. ah...! Just because you haven't heard them, doesn't mean...

...they're not great.

I haven't read "The Brothers Karamazov", but I have to admit it's probably a great book.

[JVS]

20. No way! It totally sucked. Sholokhov's Tiki Don is much better

In English it is devided into "And Quiet flows the Don" amd "The Don Flows Home to the Sea"

[CanuckAmok]

23. Are you insane?

Nothing is as good as "Court-Ordered Crossdresser", by Rod Shaft!

[JVS]

27. What about "Fast Sofa" by Bruce Craven?

[CanuckAmok]

31. Touche!

n/t

[shadu]

16. Brian Wilson sucks, this is true

your album selections seem drawn from an extremely
limited population.
Me no likey.

[NightTrain]

17. Your list of the so-called "Best Albums Ever" is about 95% white.

Would you compile a list of the best Impressionist painters and not include anyone French?

Your list also does not go before the late 1960s.

So much for my taking YOUR musical opinions seriously! :eyes:

[CanuckAmok]

18. They are somewhat influenced by Black music...

...Sorry, to me music has no colour.

[NightTrain]

21. So you prefer 2nd- and 3rd-generation declensions to the originators?

One more reason for me not to take your musical opinions seriously.

And I always get that excuse, "To me, music has no color," whenever I point out to someone that 95% of their favorite music is by artists of European descent. As they say in Mexico: "Toro mierda."

[CanuckAmok]

24. Yes, for the same reason I'd rather ride in a 2004 Mercedes than...

...a 1912 Mercedes.

[NightTrain]

25. You're comparing art to mechanics!

No wonder most of your favorite music has less soul than a worn-out sandal. :eyes:

[shadu]

29. at most he is not rap: rap is crap

Eminem has one good song. Amazing but true.
Otherwise, rap is utter bullshit.
Brian Wilson sucks but at least it ain't rap.

[NightTrain]

32. And you can't have "crock" without "rock."

How nice of you to completely write off a genre that has existed and, yes, grown for 25 years! :grr:

[Screaming Lord Byron]

34. Clearly the Best Album Ever is 'Loveless' by My Bloody Valentine.

[NightTrain]

30. You know, I've never claimed that my yearly favorites lists were...

...the last word on what was good in music for a particular year. They're simply my 100 personal favorites of the year in question.

As at least one other poster to this thread has noted, musical taste is purely subjective. Personally, I can't take someone seriously if they're convinced that their taste in music is definitive and that whomever disagrees with it is an ignorant, tone-deaf loser.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

33. Be wary of 'acclaimed musical visionary/geniuses'

It's almost always a code-word for mentally ill.

[JVS]

35. Now that is something you can bank on!

[NightTrain]

36. Or, it's a code-word for "pretentious, white-bread, and dull."

:evilgrin:

[Screaming Lord Byron]

37. Unless you're Sly Stone or George Clinton.

They get that brush too.

[NightTrain]

39. True. In which case, it's a code-word for "major fucking drug-taker!"

:smoke:

[Screaming Lord Byron]

42. There's a fine line between junkie and madman.

Or, at least, there was, until Sly snorted it.

[JVS]

43. That line is where we find Rick James

[DU GrovelBot]

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