Funniest word for a penis

[LostInAnomie]

Poll question: Funniest word for a penis

Which one of these synonyms for the male genital tickles your funny bone the most?

[terrya]

"Johnson"

That's the funniest, to me. :-)

[DebJ]

23. obviously this is NOT YOUR last name...my kids hated that!

[Placebo]

1. Whenever I say "dong" no one knows what i'm talking about...

but it's my favourite one! :D

[jonnyblitz]

2. pecker. n/t

[eleny]

3. Salami

[htuttle]

4. I think Yiddish has the corner on funny names for the male genitals

Schvantz, putz, shmuck, petseleh, schlong, etc...

At least they're the most fun to say.

:)

[4morewars]

11. You forgot...

schmeckel !!!!

[Worst Username Ever]

5. Purple helmet love warrior

[Cheswick2.0]

6. Penis

[democrat in Tallahassee]

7. W

[Rabrrrrrr]

8. Tiddler

that's what mom always called it when I was 3-5 years old.

[AndyP]

9. schwantz

pronounced sh-wants

[ze_dscherman]

63. That's the most common german name for it!

We spell it Schwanz, put the pronounciation is like the yiddish one.

[skygazer]

10. John Thomas

Leave it to the Brits to give him a PROPER name.

[frylock]

12. crank

[LostInAnomie]

13. 16 inches of sexual heroin...

... maybe that is just mine.

[ronnykmarshall]

25. Holy mole!

You ever trip over that thing?

[VOX]

14. Blue-veined Love Hammer.

Nothing like a bit of muscled machismo. :)

[bearfan454]

15. Mr. Winky

[tXr]

16. heat-seeking moisture missile

[no_hypocrisy]

17. Mr. Happy

I think that came from Robin Williams.

[jessicazi]

18. How about...

my personal favorite, One-eyed monster


-Jessica

[no_hypocrisy]

21. Welcome to DU. I remember that name from Austin Powers #2 at the end.

Funny!

[Tredge]

19. Wasn't there a song about this?

Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy.
It's divine to own a dick,
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world's biggest prick.
So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas.
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake,
Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend,
Your Percy, or your cock.
You can wrap it up in ribbons.
You can slip it in your sock,
But don't take it out in public,
Or they will stick you in the dock,
And you won't come back.

Credits to Monty Python

[jeff30997]

59. LOL ! That song is so funny !

It's from The meaning of life.Great movie.

[miss_kitty]

20. i voted for junk

but i favour 'cheney' as well

[Deja Q]

22. My penis has a first name, it's

L-A-R-G-E !

:crazy: :silly:

You were expecting O-S-C-A-R?! :WOW:

[ronnykmarshall]

28. Really?

Not that I'm a size queen.

[LostInAnomie]

30. Funny, cause those are the only ones you seem to comment on...

... HMMMM...

[ronnykmarshall]

31. Ya noticed huh, BIG boy?

[Deja Q]

37. ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!

LOL, thanks for the thread (and the chuckle!)

As for your question of 'really?'... Really. O8)

[kcwayne]

24. Wanker

[ronnykmarshall]

26. Goober

That's what we called it as kids.

[name not needed]

27. I call mine the "Whopper with Cheese"

Well, once, anyway. :P

[newsguyatl]

47. with cheese?

uhhhh, i don't wanna know.

[IronLionZion]

29. one-eyed trouser snake

plunging into the bush

[Endangered Specie]

32. Thing-a-ma-bob.

[DemWitch]

33. Mr. Happy

happy happy joy joy

[Swede]

34. Purple viened custard chucker.

[CO Liberal]

35. I Prefer the Term "Mr. Happy"

:-)

My wife votes for the "one-eyed trouser snake". I've spoiled that woman....

[SmileyBoy]

36. John Henry Johnson

Named after a retarded right-wing idiot who frequently writes dumbass LTTE's to my local paper.

[BlueJazz]

38. Passion-Log

[Jokinomx]

39. Bird in the Bush....hahahah

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

40. The Bishop

[miss_kitty]

56. you don't call it 'Scooter?' eom

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

73. No, but I guess I should, come to think of it

[stranger_with_candy]

41. one-eyed monster

[Guy Fawkes]

42. Cheney! (No denying it, he is a dick!)

[HEyHEY]

43. Big Jim and the twins

[SarahB]

44. Winky

I say "penis" in order to use the correct anatomical terminology, but my boys still run around the house saying, "Winky winky winky!" all the time. :crazy:

[HEyHEY]

46. HEY!

Where've you been?

[SarahB]

68. I've been around.

I must have had a good 15-20 posts yesterday. Largely though, I just sit around being melancholy because I haven't landed a job yet and my life is in utter limbo. :crazy:

[pagerbear]

45. Meat and 2 veg.

Wasn't that from an Austin Powers movie?

[gauguin57]

48. One-eyed trouser trout is my fave ...

... but Mister Winky is a close second.

[miss_kitty]

49. wedding tackle

although that's including the scotch eggs as well....

[drumwolf]

50. Anyone here ever read Stewart Home?

He's a British gay leftist skinhead author who's written some outrageously over-the-top pulp novels. And he's got some very colorful terms for penis: "plonker", "love muscle" and "fuck stick."

He also uses the euphemism "liquid genetics" to refer to something else as well.

[Kat45]

51. Crank.

I always get a kick out of that one. Another weird one is choad.

[ironflange]

52. "It"

Sorry, I guess that's not a very funny name.

[GingerSnaps]

53. "You know what"

At least that is what we called it when I was growing up.

[MisterP]

54. Gov. Schwarzenegger

[Wapsie B]

55. Trouser Snake,

or Hip Pickle.

[Christof]

57. Man-size manicotti.

:)

[jeff30997]

58. Rocky Bigboa.

:)

[roguevalley]

60. my dad calls them wickerbills. :-D I love my dad. LOL! Also, we call

our dogs schlongs widgies. They're short legged (dachsies) and often get them caught jumping up on things.

RV, still laughing over Jim and the twins.

[roguevalley]

61. wickerbills. widgies.

EDIT: damn. I was told the last post didn't. sorry.

RV, still laughing.

[Warren DeMontague]

62. "Fuckstick" n/t

[soothsayer]

64. Pud

for pudendum

[Dogmudgeon]

65. Man root

Henry Miller's word for it in one of the Tropics books.

--bkl

[Dogmudgeon]

66. Todger

Rhymes with Roger.

Sometimes also "Tadger", to rhyme with Badger.

Popular in the British Isles, rhyming with Piles.

--bkl

[slutticus]

67. Peter.

[bo44]

69. Dick Prick and the Dangles

[rhino47]

70. wedding tackle

that always cracks me up for some odd reason.

[LostInAnomie]

71. Sadly, this is the most responses I have ever received for a thread.

uhhhh..... flesh whistle.

[GinaMaria]

72. stretch armstrong or Darth Vader