New Drugs for Women

[silverweb]

Important new information recently received:

DAMNITOL
Take two and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to eight full hours.

ST. MOMMA'S WORT
Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolers unconscious for up to two days.

EMPTYNESTROGEN
Suppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you of how awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they moved out.

PEPTOBIMBO
Liquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and prevents conception.

FLIPITOR
Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urge to flip off other drivers.

MENICILLIN
Potent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethal lines as, "You make me want to be a better person Can we get naked now?"

BUYAGRA
Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency, duration, and, credit limit of spending spree.

JACKASSPIRIN
Relieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday, anniversary, or phone number.

ANTI-TALKSIDENT
A spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to share their life stories with total strangers in elevators.

NAGAMET
When administered to a Significant Other, provides the same irritation level as nagging all weekend, saving the the time and trouble of doing any chore oneself.


:spank:

[silverweb]

1. Slow night?

I thought for sure this post would get some chuckles, maybe distract from the poisonous vapors emanating from the RNC?

:shrug: