I hate you

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

If you're healthy, I hate hate HATE you.

I loathe young, tan, slim, strong people. They have the gall to go out in public with their perfectly trimmed hair, their silky-smooth skin, their perfect teeth, their chisled bodies and cleft chins, and strut around while the rest of us aging folk hobble along on our canes and in our wheelchairs, barely able to step up the curb.

I can't stand people with springy arches, straight backs, and full heads of hair. I can't stand martial artists with their extraordinary flexibility. I can't stomach weight lifters with their bulked-up muscles. I cant stay in the same room with those who look like they were raised on a South Sea island packed full of genetically perfect bloodlines.

But most of all I hate joggers. How dare you prance down MY streets in weather hot and cold, showing off for the world to see? What's with you, wasting your lives dashing in circles, ending up back where you started, not even breathing heavily? Where do you get off displaying your perfect bodies in public? You preverts...

When I see a jogger I turn into David Carradine in Death Race 2000. To me joggers are merely worth extra points. As are loving couples, men in form-fitting business suits (SWEAT, DAMN YOU!) and children on bicycles. Show up in MY neighborhood and SEE how long you last! You annoy the hell out of me, and you'll eventually pay the price. (My only consolation is the knowledge that most joggers eventually ruin their legs, get shin splints, and blow their knees out. Good. At least you'll know how I felt when I had to have my knee replaced two times because of the arthritis...)

All I'm saying is, don't mess with me. Don't talk to me. And DON'T come ANYWHERE NEAR ME. Just stay at the clubs. Hang out in your weight rooms. Go take your steambaths somewhere else.

I really don't want to have to hurt you...

[Maestro]

1. I'd love to read your post but

I am going for jog.

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

4. That's okay.

Just watch your back-- you may never know I'm behind you... :evilgrin:

[Maestro]

14. I used to look like this then

I started jogging. I am now svelt. Give it a shot.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

2. tee hee hee

sorry i upset you :P

[disgruntled_goat]

3. bra

vo.

a highly articulate rant.

[Lizz612]

5. Whoa! Put a warning on that Rant!

I'm sorry that you've had a hard time in your body recently. Be warned, you are going to get a ton of people disagreeing with you. I just hope you can get ride of some of the bitterness that you are showing here.

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

7. That's what I love about this place.

Everyone always gets the joke.

O8)

[Lizz612]

8. Sorry

*blushes*
I don't know what to say....

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

Just remember...

This "IS" the lounge!

:toast:

[Lizz612]

11. *rather red*

I keep forgetting the fine art of sarcasm today...
To much reading of textbooks will do that to you.

[enigmatic]

6. I Hate My dirty laundry..

I wish it would wash itself; it's the least it could do..

[The_Casual_Observer]

9. Ok Ok Ok,

But who is #1?

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

10. Haven't found out yet, but

when I do, I'm gonna run over him...

[VOX]

12. Oh-oh. You might be running over yourself!!!

It can be argued that Number Six is, in fact, Number 1.

Although I don't know how you'd quite handle the physical division of labor as both "runner" and "runee."

Hang in there -- :toast:

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

13. Now we're getting into zen philosophy.

I happen to hate philosophers, too... :evilgrin: