I want to fight Alan Keyes,

[Kid_A]

I just want to punch him in the face. Really hard. Maybe breaking his nose would fix that annoying nasal voice of his, too.

And nobody would call it a hate crime, because Alan Keyes sold his negrotude to the GOP years ago. I'm a pasty white kid from Indiana and I'm blacker than Alan Keyes.

I hate that stupid shit, and I want to beat the crap out of him before Barack Obama does it for me.

[blueknight]

1. kick his ass!

[No2W2004]

2. If you beat Keyes so bad he can't talk till November,

the Illinois Republican party will be eternally greatful. They must LOVE having to go on TV every day to badmouth their own canidate...

[ashling]

3. My daughter is convinced

that she can take Zell Miller. I think she is right.
:think: HEY! :think:
Maybe we could arrange a tag team match. Whaddya think?

[Kid_A]

4. You're on.

Zell would be easy to beat. When he's walking his twenty paces to start the duel, your daughter could just come up behind him and kick him square in his shriveled, raisin-sized balls.

[Spider Jerusalem]

5. I'd love for Zell to challenge me to a duel, personally.

The challenged party has choice of weapons. I'd go for bare knuckles. Considering the differences in age, reflexes, fitness and agility, among other things, I think the winner would be a foregone conclusion.

[Kid_A]

6. You could use your bowel disruptor on him.

But be sure to wear a poncho, because that guy is absolutely full of shit.

[Spider Jerusalem]

7. Old Zell needs to talk to the Chair Leg of Truth, I think...

THEN the bowel disruptor.

[Kid_A]

8. And then the cat could pee on him before the Filthy Assistants take naked

pictures of him being raped by a prostitute with an attack womb.