I am Alan Keyes. Ask Me Anything.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

Jesus talks to me all the time. I can pass the message to you.

[elperromagico]

1. What if Mr. Obama offered to debate you in Maryland,

just to give you home field advantage?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

5. obama is the devil

i spit on him....GOD spits on him...

[WoodrowFan]

2. lottery numbers for this coming weekend??

I promise to give 10% to my church!

[La Lioness Priyanka]

6. God is against gambling

dont you know anything? pagan! infidel! idiot!

[WoodrowFan]

7. but if I know the numbers

it's not REALLY gambling!!

[NC_Nurse]

3. Here's my question...

:wtf:

[La Lioness Priyanka]

28. god condemns you!!

eternity in hell is what you deserve you damned lieberal

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

4. Jesus can't save you from the spanking Obama is going to give you .

;) Tell me , how do you feel about that ?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

9. You Sodomite!!!!!!!!!!

god will roast you in his heavenly fires

[skypilot]

8. Will you be commuting from Maryland...

...to Illinois everyday?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

16. no

god will let me know what is happening in IL...i can then declares God's wish from maryland

[skypilot]

26. Oh, that's right.

I forgot.

[XNASA]

10. What are your thoughts on your new apartment in..........

Calumet Park, Illinois?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

17. god spits on xnasa

he is a disgusting little liberal

[XNASA]

Yeah. Sure. But what about Calumet Park? How do you like it?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

23. calumet park is the place god asked me to live

for political advantage...you know god ...hes a tricksy little hobbit

[XNASA]

34. GOTCHA Mr. Keyes. Your apartment is not in Calumet Park.....

It's in Calumet CITY!!!!

You're an idiot!! Bwah!!!!! A-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-Ha-!!!!!

:evilgrin:

[arcane1]

11. ok, can you stop being Alan Keyes?

it's just not the same ;)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

19. are you questioning the man

who speaks directly to god?

[arcane1]

21. oh yes!

are you questioning Jesus?

[AntiSmirk]

12. Yes, I have a question for you, Mr. Keyes...

Why the fuck are you such an idiot?

Thank you, I'll hang up and listen.

[meegbear]

13. My car's engine has been making an odd sound ...

I'm not sure, but usually happens when I slow down from driving over 45 and will last for about 3 seconds. What do you recomend I do?

[tandot]

14. I have sex for fun, not procreation...will I go to hell?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

20. absolutely. god condems such vile acts of lascivousness

[Kid_A]

15. How many members of the Wu Tang Clan can you name?

I'm white, but I can't shake the feeling that I'm blacker than you are. Care to prove me wrong?

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

18. Even I don't know how many members of the Wu Tang Clan there are

Not to offend but I doubt if 80% of black people know the answer to that as well . And btw , what does being " black " mean ?

[Kid_A]

29. I'm just curious as to how much knowledge Mr. Keyes has of black culture.

I think it's a valid question. Since many of his constituents will be urban black youth, I wanted to know how much he knows about their culture. Mr. Keyes obviously cares about young black men or else he wouldn't be running for the Senate where cities like Chicago would be in his jurisdiction. Maybe it's just me, but I like knowing that my Senators have at least a slight clue about what my life if like, and I'm sure many Chicago residents feel the same way. I bet Barack Obama does, too.

Unless of course the Illinois GOP chose you as their candidate purely because they wanted an African-American to run against Obama, in which case you, Mr. Keyes, are a sad, pathetic man.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

32. You have an EXCELLENT point ... I did not think about that

Kudos for that point . Well Keyes will not have to worry about that since he is going to lose his election anyway .

[La Lioness Priyanka]

33. are you questioning the man, God, Bush & Cheney Chose to run

against the evil democrat?

you are a stupid youngster

[KamaAina]

22. What's the capital of Illinois?

As a loyal Illinoisan, I'm sure you've got this one down pat, so how about it?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

24. do not question god, you sinning liberal!!

[sidestreamer]

25. There is a large Muslim constituent in the Chicago area. How do you plan

on representing them, as senator from Illinois?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

27. they are all doomed to hell

and dont need no representing

[miss_kitty]

30. When did Jesus-uh! start telling you of his voting choices?

and is he really registered in Illinois?

[LynneSin]

31. I have friends who are Gay & Lesbian but I am not, that doesn't make me...

a bad person does it?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

35. you are a sinner!

god knows it

[SoCalDem]

36. Will you please crawl back under your rock??

....(The reallllly heavy rock)...(the rock with all the sharp pointy slivers)

:)

[La Lioness Priyanka]

37. only if god says so

and god says follow God, Bush & Cheney!!

[nickgutierrez]

38. Have you been fitted for your straitjacket yet?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

41. jesus will take pleasure

in slowly roasting you

[nickgutierrez]

42. Who is Jesus, and why is he eating people?

[ronnykmarshall]

39. Has Lynne Cheney called you to kick your ass

for talking smack about her daughter?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

40. sodomite! Faggot!

you dare talk to me.

PS. LIONESS PRIYANKA LOVES YOU...She is a sinning dyke :P

[sidestreamer]

43. Another question: do you remember the Golden Rule? ((n/t))

[No2W2004]

44. Do you know who Judy Barr Topinka is?

Also, why is she so pissed off at you?

[La Lioness Priyanka]

45. i crashed her party

with gods permission

[ProfessorGAC]

46. Are You Aware Of Your Insanity?

I mean, it's pretty obvious to the rest of us, but are you so disconnected that you have no idea just how crazy you are?
The Professor

[La Lioness Priyanka]

47. I am not crazy.

if i were would God, Bush & Cheney want me to represent IL?

[GoddessOfGuinness]

48. Mr. Keyes, are you trying to sound insulting or stupid?

Enquiring minds want to know.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

49. ok i cant do alan keyes anymore

but both