I'm finally done with the September issue! Ask me anything...

[eyesroll]

...that can be answered in a rhymed couplet.

(I've already done one-word, two-word, and yes/no answers. I need a challenge! And I'm bored!)

[Richardo]

1. Why in the name of the Dionne Quintuplets...

Would you want to answer only in rhymed couplets?

[Spider Jerusalem]

2. Because a sonnet takes too much effort to write?

[eyesroll]

7. Aye, as I am still technically at work

A sonnet would cause me my responsibilities to shirk.

[eyesroll]

4. It's a more difficult rendition

Of a DU Lounge tradition.

[Bunny]

3. Issue? What issue, I say!

Pray, do tell me today!

[eyesroll]

5. The September issue, my magazine of employment

Cover story? The war against germs, and its soldiers deployment.

[Beer Snob-50]

18. The little blue toilet cakes

kill the germs for hygiene sakes

[eyesroll]

21. Actually, not quite...the blocks are there to quell

an otherwise horrible urinal smell.

[Beer Snob-50]

23. They always seemed to me

to be a target for my pee,

[eyesroll]

25. Well, yes, if you don't get any pee on the tile

That's one less hiding place for aromas vile.

[Beer Snob-50]

28. As I am a stupid male

pee on the tile, it never fail...s

Gawd, I feel like a poet, a real longfellow

[eyesroll]

37. Talks of your "longfellow" fill me with dread

This WILL NOT GET LOCKED. IT IS NOT A SEX THREAD.

[Beer Snob-50]

40. I do not mean to fill you with dread

but everyone's cultural appetite I am keeping fed

[Beer Snob-50]

6. Why should we all move to Wisconsin?

[eyesroll]

9. Wisconsin food groups come in threes--

There's beer, brats, and, of course...cheese.

[Beer Snob-50]

12. I am impressed

even if she's not undressed
(okay really lame)

[eyesroll]

14. Alas, my office I must share

So there will be no going bare.

[dolo amber]

8. How'd the centerfold turn out?

:evilgrin:

[eyesroll]

10. On the left, an article about the election;

On the right, some news blurbs about a factory's erection.

[Magrittes Pipe]

11. You said "erection."

I didn't know it was THAT kind of magazine! :o

[eyesroll]

13. You never ask me about what I do all day

For all you know, p. 21 is a pic of Mike ....

(last name ommitted for privacy reasons but I assure you it rhymes)

[Beware the Beast Man]

15. Did you write about air fresheners and pink soap dispensers?

Toilets and sinks with red motion sensors?

[eyesroll]

16. Pre-moistened towelettes and toilet-bowl rings!

These are a few of my favorite things...

[tigereye]

17. many a day have I longed to be free

When, pray tell will it happen to me?


(now I wish I could write some reports in rhymed couplets, I don't think that would go over well.) :)

[eyesroll]

24. My psychic abilities are, alas, two-bit at best

Perhaps in the Meeting Room you should put your request?

[EstimatedProphet]

19. So, what magazine is it for which you write?

And the content-is it considered heavy or light?

[eyesroll]

22. My magazine is a cleaning-industry omnibus

Unless you're a janitor, you probably haven't heard of us.

[eyesroll]

20. Wow, sinking so quickly today?

Would anyone else like to play?

[chiburb]

26. Say you needed a new coat. Where would you get one?

[eyesroll]

27. I've already exhaused that one little store.

Perhaps the Goodwill might have some more?

[chiburb]

30. I thought you liked thrift...

If you catch my drift...

;-)

[eyesroll]

33. Ah...but each thrift store only works once in a while...

I've picked over everything there in my style.

:P

[redqueen]

29. You're done with September just now?

Wow... y'all publish late... looking forward to October?

Yeah I know it's two questions but the first one is rhetorical.

[eyesroll]

32. October is our venerable "Guide to the Show."

It's boring, but pretty, and vapid, so...no.

[redqueen]

35. Ooooh... a show issue!

Any chance of a shocking expose piece?

:evilgrin:

[eyesroll]

36. Sadly, no. It's all fluff and pablum and pap and PR.

But at least, at the show -- my employer covers the tab at the bar!

[Lavender Brown]

31. Isn't my nephew cute?

[eyesroll]

34. Awww...how adorable! He's yawning!

Over him his loved ones are fawning!

[Lavender Brown]

38. I've turned into a crazy fawning auntie

:)

[eyesroll]

39. Crazy fawning aunties are far less annoying

Than "male co-worker droning on about his wedding" -- he's just cloying.