Help! I'm trapped in a DU love monongle.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

I love me, but I don't love me.

What can I do?

[Magrittes Pipe]

1. Invade Poland.

Do you really have any other option?

[Screaming Lord Byron]

7. It's that or self-flagellation.

[rooboy]

2. Sounds like a job for Dr Phil. n/t

[Screaming Lord Byron]

6. Nonsense. He's rubbish and Southern.

(now where's Cheswick?) :evilgrin:

[Minstrel Boy]

3. Maybe you should see other people.

Give yourself some space. You'll come around.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

5. You think I need some time away from each other?

Maybe. But it'll be tough.

[mrboba1]

4. just spank the monkey!!

This one, you perv!

[matcom]

8. touch yourself

nicely

[Screaming Lord Byron]

9. When I think about you

I touch myself.

Ooh. Ooh ooh. Ooh ooh. Ay ay ay ay ay ay ay.

[matcom]

10. i know you do

but his is about YOU!

[Bunny]

If you love you, let yourself go.

If you come back, it was meant to be.
If you don't come back, blah blah blah.
Good luck.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

13. Thanks, Sting.

[blondeatlast]

11. Love me?

Or invade Iran?

[Screaming Lord Byron]

12. Tough choice. I'll have to go with the loving.

All around the world,
Every boy and every girl,
Need the loving.
The humble and the great,
Even those we think we hate,
Need the loving.

Soldiers of the queen,
All the hard men that we’ve seen,
Need the loving.
Babies at the breast,
Those in power and those suppressed,
Need the loving.

Let’s face it you just can’t hide,
Your first taste’ll send you reeling,
Like a firework to which we’re tied,
Be prepared to go through your ceiling now.

The loving’s coming,
The loving’s more than just an ad man’s vision.
The loving’s strumming,
On your heart strings,
So loud that you can’t help but listen.

Sailors on the seas,
Or the clergy on their knees,
Need the loving.
All the rich and poor,
Even those we fight at war,
Need the loving.

That thing that we need most of,
That stuff we should try before we’ve died.
Everyone is begging to be loved,
With a free gift, a working heart inside.

The loving’s coming,
The loving’s advertised in all the papers.
The loving’s humming,
Your favourite song,
For once it won’t annoy the neighbours.

The loving, the loving.

All round the world,
Every boy and every girl,
Need the loving.
Cold-hearted or warm,
Every single person born,
Needs the loving.

Way out there in space,
Think we’ll find that alien race,
Needs the loving.
And just to end the list,
Everything that could exist,
Needs the loving.

The loving’s coming!

[Fenris]

14. Cut off your genitals!

Just, you know, because.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

15. It might relieve the tension.

I'll give it a go.

[Magrittes Pipe]

16. Talk about your superfluous suggestions.

:eyes:

[Fenris]

17. You are superfluous.

[Magrittes Pipe]

19. Hey! That's so weird!

My mom almost NAMED me "Superfluous!" :D

[ScreamingMeemie]

18. Take yourself on one of those retreat weekends which work so well

for couples like you and yourself. You can stay up late talking to yourself. You can write yourself love letters. You can spend time getting to know you. I think you've got a great chance of making it work between you both.

[dolo amber]

20. Behead yourself in protest

[Screaming Lord Byron]

21. OK.

But I might need some help with the hacking when I get to the bone.