What's the most embarrassing thing you went to MD for

[prolesunited]

Just curious

[Avalux]

1. You first

:hi:

[Magrittes Pipe]

2. Vapor lock.

I was SO embarassed when I learned I should have gone to the auto mechanic.

[curse10]

53. LoL- My old Bug used to have that problem all the time!

it'd get a little bit warm then BAM! vapor lock!

[asthmaticeog]

3. Once, in high school,

I thought I should have started having periods but I hadn't yet. But then the doctor told me I was a 16 year old MALE. MALE! FUCK YOU, MOM!

[short bus president]

4. I dunno

I've gone to Maryland to get some weed before. And dolo amber tells me she one time drove to Baltimore from OH just to get some crabcakes.

[peekaloo]

6. *giggle*

:D

[prolesunited]

7. Hey, doctor wouldn't fit

in the subject line. Cut me some slack.

[eyesroll]

5. OK. I'll bite. It was the night of the big music festival on campus.

I was peeing blood. This was unrelated to the music festival.
This had never happened before. I called the ER and they told me to get down there ASAP, since it had never happened before, it was quite vile and painful, and it was Friday night and it couldn't wait until Monday.

Now, I didn't have a car. My BF didn't have a car. Those with cars were in no position to use them.

Campus security was the designated non-ambulance urgent hospital transport. I was forced to call them to have them take me to the hospital. They, of course, assumed they were transporting me for alcohol poisoning (I was not drinking at all that night -- too busy peeing blood). My BF (now husband) came with me.

Then, when I got to the intake area of the ER, they asked all sorts of nosy questions (at least my BF knew about the date of my last menstrual period, and whether I was sexually active or not, and he didn't really care when my last bowel movement was).

Then, of course, I had to pee in the cup and walk the sample across a crowded hallway. Then, the doc held up the sample and noticed it was, well, bloody and told me that this one was straightforward (they did eventually run the test -- UTI). He told me it came from sex, and that my BF and I would have to be more careful. Then for some reason the doc and the BF started talking and found out they were both from the same town and knew lots of the same people (I did mention that he was still holding the sample up, right?).

Oy.

[Stew225]

11. It started innocently enough. I was going to end

my celebration at six beers at a party just north of The Ohio State University campus back in the sixties. Well, as fate would have it I exceeded my limit. The next morning I woke up in a different apartment with a young maiden with whom I had apparently, uh, decided to "go steady with". Since she looked like she was going for her doctorate in promiscuity, not to mention the fact that we didn't know anything about each other save for some physical exercise, we went our separate ways. I returned to school and she returned to studies at a street corner.

Fast forward about three weeks when my wee-wee burned when I peed. I was so shook up that I forced myself to see my family doctor to take a test for VD. As it turned out I was clean.

Moral of the story: Only you can prevent forest fires.

[greatauntoftriplets]

8. Well, it was the ER and I had a dislocated jaw...

...from yawning. They kept coming in and playing 20,000 questions with me. You have no idea how difficult it is to talk coherently with a dislocated jaw.

Fortunately, they got it back to its normal state without having to admit me, operate and break the damn jaw to fix it. Sort of like destroying the village to save it.

This happened two years ago last June.

[barb162]

15. may I ask how they did it, that is, get it back in place

[greatauntoftriplets]

16. It took 3 docs of obviously improving skills.

They basically pushed and manipulated the damn thing. I was given something to not feel pain.

First up was a woman, probably an intern. She was tiny and gave it a moderate yank. Nothing.

Then came a guy who was probably a resident. He was a bit stronger, but still....

Then someone who had to be a fully fledged doctor. My sister was there with me and attested to the fact that -- while young -- he did look older.

He climbed on top of me (which was an interesting experience -- he was good looking and even in my pain and fear, I noticed) and yanked at it harder than the other two. One yank and it felt a bit better. Second yank he got it back to normal.

It still hurt for a bit. This happened on a Saturday night. Sunday I was something of a zombie. Stayed home MOnday to recover and visit the primary care physician, who said it was a fluke and not to worry about it too much.

But I am curious. Did you have something similar happen?

[barb162]

42. no but I know someone who had this from yawning

and that perosn ended up in the ER too. Also I know a guy who fell off a ladder, dislocated his shoulder and was at the ER for hours. The ER docs and others were trying to get the shoulder back in place and this guy was screaming in pain. Finally the orthopedics guy walks in (after he got done with his golf game I presume), takes one look, grabs his arm and put it back in place. Like 10 seconds total . I find time and time again: The docs who know what they are doing, really know what they are doing. It would not surprise me if that cute one you had was an orthopedist.

[greatauntoftriplets]

45. No, cutie pie was an ER doc.

Just more experienced. I have been to that ER many times with my elderly mother and I had seen this doc before.

Sorry about your friend. It really hurts.

[barb162]

48. one more comment on cute docs

a few years ago I had an awesomely handsome doctor and I couldn't stand seeing him as I would turn red in his presence. He was that good looking. SO there I would be with my flabby thighs, big rear, etc. and this guy was a god. I have a normal looking doctor now and it is much easier on me. Physicals and medical treatment are bad enough without worrying how the god is looking at flab.

[Skittles]

67. it happened to me at the dentist

he was able to just massage my jaw back in place. You are right - hurts like hell

[Safi]

9. Penis wart

(or so I thought, it turned out that it wasn't, will give details if pressed)

Where do I collect my prize?

-Safi

[Blue-Jay]

10. "It was a million to one shot, Doc. Million to one."

[dolo amber]

12. Let's see...

There's the time I fell out of a 4th story window...but I was so entirely fucked out of my mind (and body) on chemicals that I was like a ragdoll and bounced...According to the paramedics that saved my life, go figure...(a couple plastic trash cans helped break my fall)...I made the news for that one...

Then there's the one when I went to piss after a LONG night of birthday celebrating...thought I'd hit the last stair, but it was like the 3rd last...hung in the air ala Wile E. Coyote a couple seconds then plunged the rest of the way, shattering my ankle...

And of course I couldn't leave out the infamous *yes I'm only a 100 lb 19 yr old but why on earth shouldn't I be able to consume loads of narcotics AND a bottle of tequila* episode...

BUT...

The greatest one of all wasn't mine...my good friend...I'll call her "Heather" (since that's her name...heh)...had to go to the emergency room once because she:

Put in a tampon, forgetting she already had one in. Went in with both hands to find the first, and ended up getting them both lost.

:7

[Blue-Jay]

14. She lost both her hands?!?!

:wow:

[VOX]

23. You are a **nut**!!!!

:) :thumbsup: :bounce:

[fudge stripe cookays]

21. Damn, girl!

You beat me in the partying department!!

Try the tampon thing when you don't KNOW the first one's been in there too long (over a month or 2)

Not pleasant, I can assure you.
FSC

[KG]

27. um. ok, how do you forget you have one in there?

?

[fudge stripe cookays]

38. Honestly....

they're quite comfortable if you put them in correctly.

Sometimes you can't even feel them. Especially if you have a heavy flow. And they can move around a bit. Especially if you're an athletic sleeper, thrashing around a lot.

My GYN doctor told me he'd seen SOOOOOOO many of these over the years. It's not as unusual as you'd think.

Hey, you asked.
FSC

[dolo amber]

31. Yes...I win

the *Idiottard who shouldn't be alive* award, to be certain...that's not even all of it either...:eyes:

And yeah, Heather's had that problem more than once. I just didn't want to make it even grosser than it already was. :D

[tigereye]

49. oh my god!

how could anyone lose one for that long? There is room in there, but not that much....!!

[fudge stripe cookays]

64. Just didn't know it was in there...

cuz it had gone up really far, and I didn't realize it.

Didn't know what was going on until I got a horrible infection.

Went to the doctor, he pulled it out, bada boom, bada bing, I'm much more careful now.

FSC

[tigereye]

50. you wild thing, you

how is it that you are still in one piece? :)

[dolo amber]

51. The jury's out on that one...

But of course the easy answer is:

"GAWD had a purpose for me..."

:P

[freeplessinseattle]

61. constipation (but I didn't know it at the time)

bad, very painful, could barely walk abdominal pains, so went to the walk-in clinic and the doc gave me a gyno exam to find out I was simply constipated. I was embarassed, but relieved it wasn't anything worse.

[TrogL]

13. sebacious cyst on my penis

What a mess.

[tedoll78]

17. This kind of stuff is why I'm loving being a radiographer!

You get to meet all sorts of interesting people with interesting ailments. B-)

My favorite? A high school athlete who "fell on" a shampoo bottle. lol.. poor fella.. cute too..

[eyesroll]

18. Have to ask two questions:

1. What's the best excuse someone's given you for why that object's where it is?
2. What's the best object you've found, heard about, or seen on an x-ray?

[tedoll78]

22. Let's see..

"I fell on it" is a classic. That excuse is always heard. I also like, "I was trying to see if it would fit," lol..

My favorite object? It's a close tie.

2) A man came into the ER claiming that he'd shoved an onion up into his rectum (I guess he was pretty desperate..). The rectum x-ray did indeed show the onion, peels and all. The doc ordered a muscle relaxer for the patient and then tried to remove the onion. No luck - the onion kept rolling around just inside the sphincter, and the doc couldn't get a solid grip on it with his forceps. So, another route was taken: they'd have to take the onion out - layer by layer. And the funny thing is, the medical personnel in the operating room were all getting teary-eyed as each layer was being pulled out. :P

1) A man came into the ER complaining of sharp abdominal pains. The doc ordered an abdominal x-ray to see if anything would show-up. Something did: several Barbie doll heads in the patient's digestive tract. It turns-out that the man had been shaving the Barbie doll heads, boiling them to disinfect them, swallowing them whole, and then enjoying the sexual stimulation that he received as they passed in the bowel tract around his prostate. And the kicker? When they'd come out the other end, he'd boil them and re-use them! Haha!

!

[eyesroll]

24. Wow!

You'd think it would be simpler (and cheaper in the long run) to just buy something made to be safe for that purpose...

Although I can safely say I've never heard of someone receiving prostate stimulation, um, the long way...:wow:

[Unperson 309]

39. I've heard of guys desperate for a little head, but...... eom

[prolesunited]

59. LOL!

Good one! :thumbsup:

[Uben]

19. Ohhhh Man!

This is it! When I was 18 (1973), I had to go to the doc to have a blood clot in a hemmorhoid lanced. He taped one side of my arse to one side of the table, and the other to the other side. The he took a scalpel and lanced the bugger! Instant relief! After that, I have never been embarassed to go to the doc for anything!

[VOX]

20. Attempting extreme physical comedy for my first wife...

We were getting ready to go out for the day -- remember those old steam-curler boxes that some women had? Well, my first wife had hers heating up on the bathroom sink while she was putting on her makeup.

I was just climbing out of the shower, when I thought I envisioned a brilliant sight gag. I didn't even get the entire sentence, "Look Honey, steamed weenie" past my lips before I was recoiling back from a ball of white-hot steam. I jumped back into the tub, ran cold water over the offended member, and screamed out for "Ice! Ice!"

So, instead of going out, we went to the doctor, where he informed me that I had second-degree burns in a very sensitive area. He asked, "How in the hell did you do that?" To which I gave a feeble shore-story about "knocking my wife's steam curlers off the sink," or some such. Needless to say, I was out of commission in the amour-department for awhile.

And this was decades before "Jackass," mind you.

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

25. The most embarrasing thing I went to Maryland for?

hmmmmm, I guess passing through to DC.

[kymar57]

26. Damn I"m not eligible

Haven't been to a doc since my mom took me as a child (35+ yrs ago)

What I don't know won't kill me. Until it does. :shrug:

[miss_kitty]

28. anal cancer

the embarrassing thing was that it was manifested as a fist-sized tumour-er-up there. i thought i had a bad hemorrhoid. that was the embarrassing part-that i was still clueless until i saw the picture of 'George' (that's for you, DS1. the location-very appropriate. i could hardly call a brain tumour 'George')

but as you can tell by this post, nothing much embarrasses me now!!

[prolesunited]

29. Was it visible on the outside

or could you just feel it when you wiped? How long did you go before seeing the doctor?

Are you OK now, I hope?

[miss_kitty]

32. could not feel it at all

my perineum started to bulge in the beginning of July 2001, then i passed blood. i called a friend of mine who had been an ER tech and asked if she thought i should go to the ER. That was 18 July 2001. My colonoscopy was on the 23rd, biopsy results came back on the 31st and chemo started 12 September, 2001.

I'm not even in the risk category, according to American doctors, for this kind of cancer.

i am ok now, but if i'd had healthcare a year or so earlier, when i started having problems that i could not afford to have checked (ok-if i'd thought even remotely that i had cancer-i definately would have been able to afford it-but i thought "wow it'll cost $2500, and they'll tell me nothing's wrong").

i had chemo and radiation. the radiation burned a hole (fistula) and i had extensive sugery-my own personal trifecta.
so i am pretty much disabled and my once fine bod is pretty much destroyed looking, but i look ok in clothes :)-loose clothes, that is.

[MisterP]

30. thigh jock itch and some pustules from opportunistic bacteria on chin

not embarrasing AT ALL (but the campus doctor was mildly irritating--"these are antibiotics; they kill the bacteria causing the infection.")

[miss_kitty]

33. whose chin? n/t

[MisterP]

34. mine; I don't need to go to a doctor for someone else's infection!

[miss_kitty]

36. oh i did what i do so well here

i mis-read what you wrote...i thought you got jock itch in the jock itch area from an opportunistic bacteria on chin. :P

[RebelYell]

35. Scabies

On my arms. Got it from little brother's turtle, of all things. I was 14. My parents were terrified it was an STD! Idiots.

[prolesunited]

37. Why on earth would your parents

think it was an STD? Did they tell you this before the visit? Did they tell the doctor what they thought? Did he laugh?

[RebelYell]

40. Paranoid. Hippie era. They didn't trust me.

Terribly ignorant parents. Still are. Pathetic.

[leftofthedial]

41. once dashed across the border from VA

to get laid

Oh! You mean Medical Doctor.

Never mind

[quisp]

43. crabs

17 years old and got crabs from using my brother's sleeping bag (yeeeech) and I had to go to the doctor I had been going to since I was one year old.

He didn't believe the sleeping bag story and gave me THE TALK because he figured my parents hadn't bothered.

VERY EMBARASSING.

[bif]

44. I went to Maryland to see Babe Ruth's birthplace.

That's kinda embarassing.

[JohnKleeb]

58. no, not at all, the babe ruth museum is awesome and baltimore

is a great town.

[SarahB]

46. How do you get people to answer these, Proles?

I mean really!

P.S.
Nothing embarassing for me! :hi:

[BiggJawn]

47. UTI and sebaceous cysts...

The UTI BURNED..I thought I had caught a dose of the Clap...
The cysts were a reaction to Ortho-Gynol cream. You figure out where....

Now nothing embarrasses me at the doctor's...

[Mobius]

52. gerbil

up the butt

[Mobius]

54. I hope you people realize Im kidding

:shrug:

[prolesunited]

55. Hey, to each their own

If gerbils do it for you, you should probably remove their teeth first.

[Mobius]

56. teeth are the best part

:shrug:

[northzax]

69. I knew celebrities posted here

loved you in American Gigolo!

[Throckmorton]

71. Was it Lemmiwinks?

Did he find the goldfish?

[nemo137]

57. a pilonidal cyst

that's right, I had the same ass-boil as Rushbo. Not a bad one (it healed up and drained out on it's own), but still. Although my buddy got one that got all infected and had to have fairly interesting ass-surgery and a long, embarassing recovery. fortunately, Drew is one of the best humored guys I know.

[miss_kitty]

60. if one has a good sense of humour

'ass illness' jokes can be quite funny....

[Susang]

62. Remember the "Today" sponge?

I sure do! :eyes:

You see, the morning after an evening of fun, the little elastic thingy that you were supposed to pull to remove it became impossible to find. It required the assistance of someone with a better "perspective" (and better tools) to remove it.

Now how's that for embarrassing? ;-)

[prolesunited]

63. So you had mkuhl

do it with a flashlight and a pair of pliers? :D

That's no too bad. At least if belonged in there as opposed to the Barbie heads.

[Susang]

68. Pre-pre-mkuhl

This was in the rockin' eighties! :headbang:

[Surf Cowboy]

65. Once I went to Maryland to see an Orioles game.

[terrya]

66. Hepatitis B.

That was pretty embarrassing, IMO.

[LynneSin]

70. I can't tell you - it's too damn embarassing

and it would ruin my reputation of being a good girl!

[Xithras]

72. Iron burn to my penis

I was getting ready for work one morning and was ironing some clothes on the ironing board. I set the iron down after I finished my slacks, but bumped the board as I was picking them up. The iron fell off the board and hit me in the worst place it could have. I had second degree burns to the upper half of my penis, and a small third degree burn on my navel.

The worst part, of course, was when the doctor attempted to apply some type of ointment to my navel and penis, and I began to get an erection. I have never in my life been so embarrassed and in such pain at the same time.

To this day I have a small triangular bald spot in the middle of my pubes where the tip of the iron nailed me. So my tip to everyone is this: Certain things should NEVER be done nude...frying bacon, playing on metal slides, and ironing clothes are at the top of the list.

Hey, you asked :evilgrin: