OMG. Brian the Creepy Marketing Guy is utterly melting down in my office.

[eyesroll]

Well, on the other side of the office. He's freaking out at my officemate about formatting an e-mail newsletter. He's also obsessively clearing his throat. I have never seen this before. He's usually eerily calm.

He's pretty close to wondering who took his Swingline, I swear...

:scared:

[sui generis]

1. do you work at the post office by any chance?

run!!!!

[eyesroll]

3. No. Publishing house.

We have spent a disproportionate amount of time and mental energy crafting mission statements lately, so I'm thinking Office Space.

[spinbaby]

12. Uh oh, mission statement...

When the mission statement becomes incomprehensible, that's a clue that you should find another job.

[flamingyouth]

19. LOL - yes

This statement also applies to non-profit organizations (speaking as a veteran volunteer/board member). :D

[Renew Deal]

2. My staaaapler.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

4. Just encase the stapler in jell-o, then throw his shoes over the roof.

That should do it.

[GCP]

8. As long as he doesn't start dancing!

I love The Office

[Screaming Lord Byron]

10. Absolutely.

I thought I might be getting a bit too obscure there.

[burythehatchet]

11. uggi..uggi..uggi

oy..oy..oy

[nini]

5. might be a good time to go the bathroom

and get away from him.


you never know what people like that will end up doing..

[Wapsie B]

6. Damn, and here I hoped

it was a repug suffering a breakdown over the election.

[redqueen]

7. LOL

Wonder what finally made him snap... it's sad, but still I laugh.

:evilgrin:

[eyesroll]

9. Well, he's gone now.

He's apparently in the office of his boss, possibly weeping.

Dear god.

[tridim]

13. He can't be as bad as the marketing guy from my old dot.com job

He would walk around the office all day with his wireless headset and can of Red Bull, yakking loudly away. I still maintain to this day that he was faking his phone calls.

The marketing lady at my last office job was great. She was a fabulous singer and whistler, and would serenade me all day long. Well, actually her desk was close enough where I could hear her singing. I kept telling her to quit and start a band.

[Red State Rebel]

14. Move his office to the basement - Quick!!

Sounds like he's ready to blow...

[dolo amber]

15. No offense intended to cube dwellers...

But if I had to work in a place like that, that would SO be me. Presumably immediately before the carnage.

Having said that, it's not like I'm EVER GONNA HAVE A FUCKING JOB EVER AGAIN, so it's really a moot point, eh?

[Screaming Lord Byron]

16. Aren't you dealing crack at junior schools?

:shrug:

[dolo amber]

Heroin

Dumbass. Get it right. Crack is *SO* 90s...:eyes:

[Magrittes Pipe]

18. Shut up, you fucking drama queen.

:eyes:

[eyesroll]

21. Yeah, but you'd be more fun about it.

He just flipped out and was near tears because my officemate didn't format the paragraphs properly. It would have taken less time to just do the formatting himself.

[Magrittes Pipe]

17. He will have to set the building on fire.

You should go to lunch soon.

[eyesroll]

20. It's Racist Mary's going away party.

I think we're going outside.

I'll be sure to take valuables with me.