Most disgusting restaurant ever.

[Sannum]

What was the most disgusting restaurant that you have ever eaten at?

For me, it is Luby's, which is a buffet chain in the south. It is the very definition of slop.

[AVID]

1. taco johns

highlight of the menu - Tater-tot/velveeta/sour cream/groundbeef burrito :puke:

[Magrittes Pipe]

2. Ah, the classic meat & potato burrito.

Taco John's is bad. But Taco City is worse. :puke:

[bmbmd]

28. Native Texan here-

after a year in northeastern Montana, with no Tex-Mex to be had, Taco John's started to taste pretty good. Take some bean slurry, wipe it on a tortilla-call it a taco.

[AngryAmish]

45. I like Taco Johns

Especially Potatoe Ole's. The food is crap, but it is a weakness.

[Magrittes Pipe]

3. Is "Luby's" named for what it does to your colon?

[MidwestMomma]

4. Ryan's

It was a steak house/buffet chain.

It was the dirtiest restaurant I've ever been in. I barely made it through the meal.

But dang if that place wasn't packed EVERY night. Go figure...

[proud2BlibKansan]

12. The last time we went to Ryan's

we saw a kid at the buffet pick up a serving spoon, take a bite, spit it back onto the spoon and put the spoon back on the plate.

Haven't had the stomach to go back since.

[mac56]

16. A great big second on Ryan's.

There's one a few blocks from our neighborhood that is always packed. Go figure.

[7th_Sephiroth]

35. third and warning bout ryans

they changed thier name to fire mountain

[MidwestMomma]

46. Yeah I know

They shut down the Ryan's here and did some 'remodeling' and re-opened as Fire Mountain. Wonder what's different?

I figured that had to shut it down and replace the walls and floors to get that place clean. :)

[7th_Sephiroth]

47. they moved closer to wally-worlds

and market heavier to seniors

[fishwax]

19. I can agree with that one

I only ate there once, and the local location has since gone out of business. Not at all surprised.

[LizW]

34. Any place with a buffet

People in the south LOVE those big buffets 'cause they can hog out on the cheap. Forget about it! I have kids and I have to serve everyone's plate every meal. When I go out to eat, I want someone to come to the table and take my order and BRING the food to me! :D

And who wants to eat food that's been lying out in the open where half the state can walk their germy selves by it? And kids, who need the "sneeze" shield the most, aren't tall enough for it to be effective. GAG!

[burythehatchet]

38. OK here ya go

Now, I know that there is a lot of embellishment that occurs on this
group and I am aware that a small number of things are perhaps sheer
fabrication, but I have a story to tell that is the absolute truth.

Funniest damn thing that has ever happened to me. A couple of weeks
ago we decided to cruise out to Ryan's Steakhouse for dinner. It was a
Wednesday night, which means that macaroni and beef, was on the hot
bar, indeed the only night of the week that it is served.

Wednesday night is also kid's night at Ryan's, complete with Dizzy
the Clown wandering from table to table entertaining the little
bastards.

It may seem that the events about to be told have little connection
to those two circumstances, but all will be clear in a moment.

We went through the line and placed our orders for the
all-you-can-eat hot bar then sat down as far away from the front of
the restaurant as possible in order to keep the density of kids down a
bit. Then I started my move to the hot bar. Plate after plate of
macaroni and beef were consumed that evening, I tell you -- in all,
four heaping plates of the pseudo-Italian ambrosia were shoved into my
belly. I was sated.

Perhaps bit too much, however. I had not really been feeling well all
day, what with a bit of gas and such. By the time I had eaten four
overwhelming plates of food, I was in real trouble.

There was so much pressure on my diaphragm that I was having trouble
breathing.

At the same time, the downward pressure was building. At first, I
thought it was only gas, which could have been passed in batches right
at the table without too much concern.

Unfortunately, that was not to be.

After a minute or so it was clear that I was dealing with explosive
diarrhea. It's amazing how grease can make its way through your
intestines far faster than the food, which spawned the grease to begin
with, but I digress...

I got up from the table and made my way to the bathroom. Upon
entering, I saw two sinks immediately inside the door, two urinals
just to the right of the sinks, and two toilet stalls against the back
wall.

One of them was a handicapped bathroom. Now, normally I would have
gone to the handicapped stall since I like to stretch out a bit when I
take a good shit, but in this case, the door lock was broken and the
only thing I hate worse than my wife telling me to stop cutting my
toenails with a pair of diagonal wire cutters is having someone walk
in on me while I am taking a shit.

I went to the normal stall.

In retrospect, I probably should have gone to the large, handicapped
stall even though the door would not lock because that bit of time
lost in making the stall switch proved to be a bit too long under the
circumstances. By the time I had walked into the regular stall, the
pressure on my ass was reaching Biblical proportions.

I began "The Move."

For those women who may be reading this, let me take a moment to
explain "The Move."

Men know exactly what their bowels are up to at any given second. And
when the time comes to empty the cache, a sequence of physiological
events occur that cannot be stopped under any circumstances. There is
a move men make that involves simultaneously approaching the toilet,
beginning the body turn to position ones ass toward said toilet,
hooking ones fingers into ones waistline, and pulling down the pants
while beginning the squat at the same time.

It is a very fluid motion that, when performed properly, results in
the flawless expulsion of shit at the exact same second those ones ass
is properly placed on the toilet seat. Done properly, it even assures
that the choad is properly inserted into the front rim of the toilet
in the event that the piss stream lets loose at the same time; it is
truly a picture of coordination rivaling that of a skilled ballet
dancer.

I was about halfway into "The Move" when I looked down at the floor
and saw a pile of vomit that had been previously expelled by one of
those little bastards attending kids night; it was mounded up in the
corner so I did not notice it when I had first walked into the stall.

Normally, I would not have been bothered by such a thing, but I had
eaten so much and the pressure upward was so intense, that I hit a
rarely experienced gag reflex. And once that reflex started, combined
with the intense pressure upward caused by the bloated stomach, four
plates of macaroni and beef started coming up for a rematch.

What happened next was so quick that the exact sequence of events is
a bit fuzzy, but I will try to reconstruct them as best I can.

In that moment of impending projectile vomiting, my attention was
diverted from the goings-on at the other end.

To put a freeze frame on the situation, I was half crouched down to
the toilet, pants pulled down to my knees, with a load of vomit coming
up my esophagus. Now, most of you know that vomiting takes precedence
over shit no matter what is about to come slamming out of your ass. It
is apparently an evolutionary thing since shitting will not kill you,
but vomiting takes a presence of mind to accomplish so that you do not
aspirate any food into the bronchial tubes and perhaps choke to death.

My attention was thus diverted.

At that very split second, my ass exploded in what can only be
described as a wake...you know, as in a newspaper headline along the
lines of "30,000 Killed In Wake of Typhoon Fifi" or something
similar. In what seemed to be most suitably measured in cubic feet, an
enormous plug of shit the consistency of thick mud with embedded
pockets of greasy liquid came flying out of my ass. But remember, I
was only halfway down on the toilet at that moment. The shit wave was
of such force and of just such an angle in relation to the back curve
of the toilet seat that it ricocheted off the back of the seat and
slammed into the wall at an angle of incidence equal to the angle at
which it initially hit the toilet seat.

Then I sat down.

Recall that when that event occurred, I was already halfway to
sitting anyway and had actually reached the point of no return. I have
always considered myself as relatively stable gravitationally, but
when you get beyond a certain point, you're going down no matter how
limber you may be. Needless to say, the shit wave, though of
considerable force, was not so sufficient so as to completely glance
off the toilet seat and deposit itself on the walls, unlike what you
would see when hitting a puddle with a high-pressure water hose; even
though you throw water at the puddle, the puddle gets moved and no
water is left to re-form a puddle. There was a significant amount of
shit remaining on about one-third of the seat rim, which I had now
just collapsed upon.

Now, back to the vomit...

While all the shitting was going on, the vomit was still on its way
up. By the time I had actually collapsed on the toilet, my mouth had
filled up with a goodly portion of the macaroni and beef I had just
consumed.

OK, so what does the human body instinctively do when vomiting?

One bends over. So I bent over. I was still sitting on the toilet,
though.

Therefore, bending over resulted in me placing my head above my now
slightly opened legs, positioned in between my knees and waist. Also
directly above my pants which were now pulled down to a point just
midway between my knees and my ankles. Oh, did I mention that I was
wearing not just pants, but sweat pants with elastic on the ankles?

In one mighty push, some three pounds of macaroni and beef, two or
three Cokes, and a couple of Big, Fat Yeast Rolls were deposited in my
pants...on the inside...with no ready exit at the bottom down by my
feet.

In the next several seconds, there were a handful of farts, a couple
of turds, and the event ended, yet I was now sitting there with my
pants full of vomit, my back covered in shit that had bounced off the
toilet, spattered on three ceramic-tiled walls to a height of about
five feet, and still had enough force to come back at me, covering the
back of my shirt with droplets of liquid shit. All while thick shit
was spread all over my ass in a ring curiously in the shape of a
toilet seat.

And there was no fucking toilet paper.

What could I do but laugh. I must have sounded like a complete maniac
to the guy who then wandered into the bathroom. He actually asked if I
was OK since I was laughing so hard I must have sounded like I was
crying hysterically. I calmed down just enough to ask him if he would
get the manager. And told him to have the manager bring some toilet
paper. When the manager walked in, he brought the toilet paper with
him, but in no way was prepared for what happened next. I simply told
him that there as no way I was going to explain what was happening in
the stall, but that needed several wet towels and I needed him to go
ask my wife to come help me. I told him where we were sitting and he
left.

At that point, I think he was probably assuming that I had pissed
just a bit in my pants or something similarly benign.

About two minutes later, my wife came into the bathroom not knowing
what was wrong and with a certain amount of worry in her voice. I
explained to her (still laughing and having trouble getting out words)
that I had a slight accident and needed her help. Knowing that I had
experienced some close calls in the past, she probably assumed that I
had laid down a small turd or something and just needed to bring the
car around so we could bolt immediately.

Until I asked her, I'm sure she had no idea that she was about to go
across the street and purchase me new underwear, new socks, new pants,
a new shirt, and (by that time due to considerable leakage around the
elastic ankles thingies) new sneakers.

And she then started to laugh herself since I was still laughing. She
began to ask for an explanation as to what had happened when I
promised her that I would tell her later, but that I just needed to
handle damage control for the time being.

She left.

The manager then came back in with half-dozen wet towels and a few
dry ones. I asked him to also bring a mop and bucket upon which he
assured me that they would clean up anything that needed to be
cleaned.

Without giving him specific details, I explained that what was going
on in that stall that night was far in excess of what I would expect
anyone to deal with, what with most of the folks working at Ryan's
making minimum wage or just slightly above.

At that moment, I think it dawned on him exactly the gravity of the
situation. Then that manager went so far above the call of duty that I
will be eternally grateful for his actions. He hooked up a hose.

Fortunately, commercial bathrooms are constructed with tile walls and
tile floors and have a drain in the middle of the room in order to
make clean up easy. Fortunately, I was in a commercial bathroom.

He hooked up the hose to the spigot located under the sink as I began
cleaning myself up with the wet towels. Just as I was finishing, my
wife got back with the new clothes and passed them into the stall,
whereupon I stuffed the previously worn clothing into the plastic bag
that came from the store, handing the bag to my wife. I finished
cleaning myself off and carefully put on my new clothes, still stuck
in the stall since I figured that it would be in bad taste to go out
of the stall to get redressed in the event I happened to be standing
there naked and some little bastard kid walked in. At that point, I
had only made a mess; I had not yet committed a felony and intended to
keep it that way.

When I finished getting dressed, I picked up the hose and cleaned up
the entire stall, washing down the remains toward the drain in the
center of the room. I put down the hose and walked out of the
bathroom. I had intended to go to the manager and thank him for all he
had done, but when I walked out, three of the management staff was
there to greet me with a standing ovation. I started laughing so hard
that I thought I was going to throw up again, but managed to scurry
out to the car where my wife was now waiting to pick me up by the
front door.

The upshot of all this is that I strongly recommend eating dinner at
Ryan’s Steak House. They have, by far, the nicest management staff of
any restaurant in which I have eaten.

[VioletLake]

39. I think we have a winner here.

Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!

That was totally vulgar, dude! :puke:

You're lucky that I'm a sucker for potty humor.

[kittycat1164]

40. OMG that's the funniest story I've ever heard

and you relate it so well. You have a gift I must say. I had tears rolling down my cheeks. Thank you - that was wonderful!

[burythehatchet]

41. I can't take credit

that story has been rolling around the web for at least a couple of years. It was a keeper

[radwriter0555]

53. Urban Myth.

Nice try though.

For fecal freaks, it's quite a treat to read each detail of this fiction, I imagine.

[VioletLake]

70. He said he didn't write it.

Fecal freaks? :eyes:

Lighten up, man.

[radwriter0555]

74. You don't realize the story is written by a person with a fascination for

fecal matter.... I'm not kidding.
There are perversions of all sorts, this "story" which is pure fiction, plays to that particular fantasy and obsession.

Freud would have a field day with its writer!

It's all in good fun, I suppose, but this kind of obsession grosses me out. It's unhealthy and abnormal.

[VioletLake]

75. How do you know that?

Did you write it?

You can express your displeasure with the story without "smearing" the poster & everyone who finds it funny.

You must have read some of it to realize that it's an "urban legend." Why torture yourself if it grosses you out? Seems a little obsessive... IMHO, that's not healthy and normal.

[musette_sf]

80. this story has been going around on Usenet

for at least 8 or 9 years. I first saw it on houston.eats, referring to Ryan's way out in the west part of town. It's since been posted to many other Usenet food groups, with the place changing depending upon the city.

[VioletLake]

86. We've established that, thanks.

I was questioning radwriter0555's knowledge of the author's motives and accompanying psychiatric diagnosis.

This conversation is bordering on ridiculous...

[burythehatchet]

90. go with the flow.....

:)

[VioletLake]

92. I'm on board for the ride.

Got my seatbelt fastened. :)

[radwriter0555]

117. Might want to google coprophilia and see what pops up.

The story and the writing are clearly a fantasy as it's so totally embellished and each detail agonizingly appreciated and slaved over, and therefore, clearly within the realm of the accurate label; coprophilia... which stems from issues prior to the age of 4.

Basic points in the study of abnormal and criminal psychology.

The study of the obscure is fascinating. One learns far more than one really should, I imagine.

[VioletLake]

118. Or...

It could be a writer having fun with their imagination for a little while. I guess you wouldn't know anything about that being a radical writer and all.

It didn't occur to me that the person might be a coprophiliac, but I guess it's possible. I'll take your word for it. ;)

[MisterP]

120. toilet humor/overkill and criminal psychology?

you just can't make a "Law & Order: SVU" episode on someone who got that way by a toilet joke

[VioletLake]

123. By the way, radwriter, in the future, when I run into you here on DU,

I'll say something like, "Ah, if it isn't my friend radwriter - world renowned expert on coprophilia."

Just kidding. :pals:

[radwriter0555]

131. Hey, the internet makes us all INSTA-EXPERTS doncha know?

I just happen to have piles (sorry) of bizarre and strange trivia and knowledge in my bag of tricks.

Sly Stallone is a well known albeit secret fecal freak. There are some strange types in hollywood.

[paula777]

84. Even if it's fake it's terribly funny

[paula777]

83. OMG that is THE funniest thing I have read in a long time!

I had tears rolling down my face I was laughing so hard. Almost puked a couple of times though .... very graphic, very funny!

[burythehatchet]

89. I've never actually made it all the way through

the toilet can be a very funny place.

[VioletLake]

93. I didn't make it all the way through either... it's a bit much. ;) n/t

[Malikshah]

109. Similar Situation--but in Turkey

This doesn't really count as it had nothing to do with this particular restaurant's food, but rather the issue of "gotta go" when the facilities are less than conducive...

Was in Istanbul a while back, taking Turkish-- great time, great food, great folks...but

As happened to all of us at one time on this trip-- the water problems (rumors of cholera epidemics etc) and the occasional dodgy food establishment led to GI problems

I'd been feeling lousy for a day or so, but my friends all wanted to go to this little seafood place north of us on the Asian side of the Bosphorous-- a 1/2 hour ferry journey was all it took to come across a wonderful little "neighborhood" with a great seafood place that overlooked the water.

I spent the next hour sipping bottled water and nibbling on some bread--not wishing to be a party pooper.

Then...it hit. I had to go--something's coming and it ain't good. I ran from the table and headed for the kitchen asking in my (then) good Turkish where the bathroom was-- it was duly pointed out as the heaves began--

Problem was it was "a la Turka"-- in other words two ceramic footprints and a hole surrounded by ceramic-- they had a nice watering can to clean up. Needless to say-- if I hadn't been about to be sick, I would have at that point. Long and loud it was. The shocked looked on the cooks faces when I returned to kitchen required an explanation that it wasn't their cooking, but rather that I was ill.

To this day--the smell of fish gives me pause.

[AzDar]

132. How apropos! Your story made me laugh so hard I whizzed myself! n/t

[sendero]

135. I read that story..

.... a couple years back on another board. It is funny.

There was also one about men shaving in a very private area. I wished I had saved it because it was the funniest thing I've ever read on the net. :)

[sendero]

136. Someone mentioned Luby's..

.... but there is a Luby's near us and it's not that bad.

My vote has to go to a chain of "steak" houses called Golden Corral.

I ate there one time and that was more than enough.

[Buns_of_Fire]

143. I hate it when that happens...

(memo to self: 86 the planned macaroni & beef dinner for tonight...)

[Arkana]

146. Fantastically funny and extremely disgusting

I cannot IMAGINE how someone would be able to laugh after something like that!

EDIT: Didn't realize it was an urban legend.

[mtnsnake]

154. Heres a similar event, only this is 100% true.I witnessed it unfortunately

I would never have posted this, but what the heck, it fits in pretty well here.

A few years ago my fishing buddy and I got up early for some walleye fishing in my area. On the way we picked up some coffees to go for the ride and to wake us up. My buddy was worried because he hadn't taken his morning dump yet, so he might have to stop somewhere along the way to use a rest room. Anyway, the urge doesn't hit him yet and we arrive at the public boat launch which borders on this public park.

We start getting our gear ready, and then I start backing the boat into the water when my buddy informs me in no uncertain terms that the "time" has arrived. He can feel it coming and he needs to find a place, pronto. So I point to the public facilities which are a couple hundred yards away from the boat launch, and he dashes over there. Within seconds, he returns, with his face all contorted and one leg crossed over the other. He tells me the facilities are all locked up because the park isn't open yet. It's barely 7 AM.

In a panic, he tells me to get him to the nearest McDonalds as quick as I can. We jump back in the truck and head out, with him getting more and more contorted looking by the second. Not even a few seconds after getting back into the truck, he screams at me he can't make it any longer and to pull over on the side of the road or he's gonna go in my truck. I tell him that I see what looks like an outhouse, probably one that the workers in the park use. I slam on the breaks, he jumps out and hobbles over to the "outhouse" undoing his pants as he gets to the door. There's a feeble padlock on the door, but my buddy is in such a frenzy that he smashes in the door, disappears inside this little building and a few minutes later emerges with a devious look on his face.

I ask him if he's okay, and he says yeah, but it wasn't any outhouse. He said as soon as he broke in, he saw it was a maintainence man's tool shed, but it was too late because he had already given in to his major release as he was breaking through the door.....and he barely got his pants down when he exploded violently all over a little desk and a wall full of tools which were neatly lined up inside the little shack. He said he used some old greasy rags to wipe himself off with. I was totally grossed out, especially when I thought what that poor mainainence man was in store for when he went inside his tool shed later that day to grab his tools or take a break. Yuk.

[chuckrocks]

112. very large cook sweating into the mashed potatoes

we just got up and walked out.

[BlueJazz]

5. Captain Dee's has always sucked for me.

I've eaten there 3 times and the "seafood" was 90 percent batter and 10 percent fish product.
The fries were limp and greasy... Yuck!

[CO Liberal]

6. Waffle House

In 1993, The Princess and I were driving west at Christmastime to visit her cousin in Arizona. We got in to Jackson, Tennessee Christmas Day - all the restaurants were closed, except for a Waffle house right next to our motel.

So we ate there. And felt sick the whole next day.

We haven't gone back to an "Awful House" since.

[RubyDuby in GA]

7. Ah. Seems you've gotten to know the Awful Waffle real well

They're at every single highway exit on every interstate in the South. DO NOT...I REPEAT...DO NOT EAT THERE. I don't care how much you guys love your scattered and smothered hash browns (I used to prefer mine scattered, chunked and peppered) - they are a blood red company. Every single cent they give is to the Republicans. I know the owner through business dealings....don't give these asshats another single penny.

With that having been said, sorry about your tummy aches CO Liberal.

[burythehatchet]

50. I don't dount any of that but many WH are franchises

there's one close to me in Decatur and it is the best restaurant experience anyone could have. It's bizarre. But the crew are all nice people, the place is spotless, and the food is beyond incredible. While the corp WH probably is blood red, I look at the crew at my WH and they are really nice people.

[Buns_of_Fire]

148. I've never had a really terrible experience at WH, either...

...as a matter of fact, it was my favorite place to eat (I know, I'm too easy to please). Alas, there are none here near my little hamlet in SW Virginia, so I've had to forego my addiction to their hash browns (scattered, smothered, covered, chunked, topped, diced, peppered, beaten, and humiliated).

Corporate WH is right near you, by the way. It's in Norcross, right off I-85 and Jimmy Carter Boulevard. And most of the restaurants ARE franchises. I found that out when I was considering opening one near My Little Town and found out that the entire state franchise had been bought by some big-ass company and they didn't intend to let anyone else in. Pissed me off.

Geez. Now I've got a jones for some cheesy eggs... :eyes:

[solinvictus]

156. Waffle House...

I went to Gulf Shores, AL with my granddad after Hurricane Ivan to clean up. Waffle House was the ONLY restuarant in Foley still open. We ate there damn near every meal for a week. The people are nice, but I know they're getting screwed royally on earnings.

[zbdent]

13. See any reapers?

http://www.sho.com/site/deadlikeme/home.do

[silvermachine]

77. Eaten at 2 different ones...

...got ill both times. Needless to say, there won't be a third time.

[4_Legs_Good]

101. On my only trip to Texas, we ate at a Waffle House...

at like 1 AM.

Roaches crawling across the floor and awful service.

Bleh x 100. why are they so prolific down there in the south?!?!

david

[Magrittes Pipe]

8. LaGrossa's pizza in Cincinnasty is pretty fucking foul.

The sauce is sweeter than most desserts. The cheese is as rubber. The meat has gone foul.

[Jeff in Cincinnati]

60. Here's what pisses me off about these guys....

The hand out these freakin' Buddy Cards (buy one, get one free) to every kid in the damned city over the age of three, so that my kids are constantly wanting to go there for pizza -- plus the cards make their pizza about as expensive as a frozen pie from Kroger.

How has this foul restaurant chain managed to stay in business for fifty years?

[Magrittes Pipe]

66. The real question is:

Why do people who leave town and then come back for a visit want to go to LaRosa's? Don't get me wrong -- when I'm back in SW OH, I always fill my belly with plenty of Skyline, Empress, and Gold Star (a successful trip is when I hit all three); but that's different. After all, Cinty chili is delicious.

Cinty pizza, on the other hand.... :puke:

[AzDar]

134. I grew up in Cincinnati...used to love Larosa's in Hyde Park..makes me

wonder...did it always suck?

[Maddy McCall]

9. Wards (southern fast food) - My son found roach leg in his malt yesterday

Disgusting. I'll never eat at another Wards, even though they make killer sausage biscuits.

[Hand]

55. Holy Moly!

If they have roach legs in the MALTS, I'd hate to guess what's in the sausages...
:scared:

[proud2BlibKansan]

10. Isn't that the restaurant

where that guy walked in and shot all those people?

[lazarus]

110. yup

Woody Harrelson's dad, actually.

[Scout1071]

11. Ponderosa and/or Sizzler.

My one experience was horrific. I won a gift certificate and give it a go with my Mom. It was so disgusting that we left and went for a PAID dinner someplace else.

Everybody in there looked like Cousin Eddie or Aunt Edna from Vacation.

[SmileyBoy]

17. I LOVE Ponderosa!!!

You probably went to a shitty location.

[LoZoccolo]

21. I used to like Ponderosa a lot...but..

...I don't know what is - they seem to have closed down all over the place, and the remaining ones I've seen are ill-kept.

[SmileyBoy]

14. The Good Earth

Some health-food restaurant. I was forced to eat there once when I was young. It was DISGUSTING.

[Guaranteed]

138. Is that the one in Santa Rosa?

I ate their, too. Ordered a burger- they bring me some kind of veggie-soy shit? What the hell?

[Padraig18]

15. Bonanza steak houses.

:puke:

[fishwax]

20. I used to love Bonanza

but I was quite little at the time, and the only thing I remember is the all you can eat soft serve ice cream bar, so that's probably why I liked it as a four-year old. :)

[jmowreader]

18. K&W Cafeteria

This is an old-timey place in Fayettenam that the head "lithographic prepress technician" (the position everyone calls "stripper") in my last job said was his very favorite place in the whole world to eat.

When a 71-year-old man tells you someplace is his very favorite place in the whole world to eat, stay the fuck away from there. I swear this sumbitch sniffed too fucking much Bestine rubber cement thinner in the last 50 years.

So I gullibly walked into this hellhole. First, there's a cloud of cigarette smoke extending down three feet from the ceiling--but there's a sign in the entrance "no pipe or cigar smoking please"...you could fire up a White Owl right in the middle of the room and no one would ever notice. Walk down the line and one will immediately notice that everything has an inch-thick layer of bacon grease floating on it. All of the meat is cooked "country style"--dredged in flour and fried in just a little grease. The only starches are mashed potatoes and home fries. Desserts include banana pudding and some kind of cobbler I couldn't figure out what the hell it was--maybe apple?

So we're walking down the buffet line examining whatever the fuck it is they were serving and I'm getting kind of a bilious look on my face. Said my wife, "what's wrong?" 'I'm not eating this.' It is very rare that I flatly say I am not going to eat somewhere, but in this case I had to. I was getting sick looking at this shit.

We wound up at Jersey Mike's having the Number 12.

[Lady Effingbroke]

22. Hartz Chicken Buffet, followed closely by the Golden Corral and Ryan's.

Luby's is five-star Michelin fare compared to those three!

[Elidor]

23. Golden Corral

And it is aptly named: humans stuff themselves through the chutes like the cattle they are, eager to line up at the feeding trough and snuffle like pigs with their noses in their food.

Honorable Mentions go to Logan's, Shoney's, etcetera.

[YellowRubberDuckie]

98. Same here...

There was this one in Yukon Oklahoma that had maggots in their salad bar and it was just completely icky. Of course, it got shut down. Then several months later it reopened as a Western Sizzlin' owned by the same people. I wouldn't go there if someone paid me 20 Million bucks.
Duckie

[borlis]

124. My husband has to take clients to Golden Corral once a week

because it's his clients favorite place for lunch. My hubby calls it "The Hog Trough." We went to one around here once just so I could see what it was all about. The food wasn't too bad. But I will tell you I have never seen so many large people in one place at the same time.

[NuttyFluffers]

128. Shoney's... i remember that being very bland and cheap

in the several road trips i have done, mostly as a child, we would hit a shoney's occasionally because it was that tempting $4 breakfast buffet. but most of the time the food was bland as hell. most of the food catered to the geriatric community. does someone really need 4 types of oatmeal, prunes, and other stewed fruits and cold cereal? after a while my mom just had enough (putting up with my dad's 'economic' ways) and just made Shoney's off limits. it was just sickeningly sad. we weren't halfway dead yet, we could still have salt, sugar, and spice. hell we could still chew and stand to have a little flavor. not good.

it might've been golden corral, but i know it was in lexington, ky, where i ate at a rather... mediocre buffet, but saw two of the most bizarre dishes i've seen. they were both 'salads.' one was 'meat salad' comprised of what appeared to be the variety pack of lunch meats sliced into rectangular strips and then tossed. the other was, naturally -- for parallelism, 'cheese salad.' this could've been a passable salad if it wasn't for the blatant use of just monterey, mozarella, several cheddars, and *sigh* american "cheese," once again sliced into rectangular strips and tossed. disturbing. my mom and i have come to the conclusion that huge swaths of america's only real seasonings are meat (particularly bacon) and cheese. it seems to go on everything, god knows why, and for some unfathomable reason, can take the place of salads. bizarre.

one of the worst meals we had on the road was one of those tourist traps in amarillo, tx. it was that one that has that challenge to eat this gigantic meal, including this huge 72 oz steak. we ate there, not for the challenge, but to have a bite of this renowned texas b-b-q and beans. perhaps the most bland serving of beans i have ever had in my life, and the b-b-q was horrendously overrated. the sauce was just monotonously sweet, the meat was cooked too fast and thus partly uncooked close to the bone, the cuts had excess grissle and the fat wasn't cooked to let its juices roll along the rib to coat with flavor and seal the moisture inside. overall it was thoroughly disappointing. we thought it was just that place, but unfortunately all our texas b-b-q experiences were similar. quite sad, seems like all talk, perhaps north texas doens't know how to cook b-b-q, or we were striking out every single time we ate in texas. doesn't anyone believe in seasoning anymore?

but easily one of the worst eating experiences we had in america was once again on the road in the middle of america. in one other trip we started to gasp from our cravings of wanting chinese food while in oklahoma. so in our drive through oklahoma city we just went into one of the better looking chinese restaurants we could find. oh dear god. oh dear god. dry stale white rice, sweet and sour *everything*, and from a can of sweet and sour industrial sized of course, pineapple, mandarin orange slices, green peppers, and gigantic white onions in every single dish. nauseatingly sweet. we expected bad, but we weren't prepared for that. from this experience and a few others in middle america we learned to pretty much avoid every sort of 'ethnic food' outside of the "wonder bread" white anglo-saxon protestant experience. and we now thoroughly believe the spice rack is mere decor in most of america's homes. i swear, coming home to the bay area makes you want to roll in spices and seasonings after being without so long. i don't know how ex-californians survive living in the central time zone. if you need an emergency shipment of sauces and spices just drop me a line -- i can only imagine the pain you must be going through.

[VioletLake]

24. I went to an Olive Garden in Philly once,

and one of the stalls in the bathroom had feces splattered all over the wall & sides. It looked like some unfortunate woman's hindquarters exploded.

The food isn't bad, but I can't see the name without thinking of... you know... :puke:

[kiraboo]

30. Thanks for that mental image! n/t

[VioletLake]

31. You're welcome. The thread called for disgusting.

I thought about including the olfactory dimension, but that would just stink.

[maveric]

25. Wasnt there a massacre at a "Luby's", a few years back?

Someone drove through a wall and shot the place up.

[SmileyBoy]

27. That was like 14 years ago!!!

I do remember the news, however.

[ChickMagic]

78. Yeah, that was a Luby's in Texas

It cemented the "right to carry" law. The rationalization was that if everyone in Luby's had a gun, nothing would have happened. The only problem with that is that most people who go to Luby's can't even see the food, much less sight a shooter.

[nostamj]

26. i can't remember the name BUT

the place where I bit into a (used) bandaid in my baked scrod HAS to win that honor....

this was MANY years ago in Hartford CT

[cags]

29. The Encounter at LAX

$8 bucks for a bowl of chunky easy mac.

[benny05]

32. How about a non-franchise

When I was a girl around 10 years old, my father drove us at night on the highways (not freeways, we were too far away) to bigger places since our car was unconditioned. He pulled over to a trucker place off the road. It was summer, hot, and the cockroaches ran across the dirty floor. Their sandwiches had warm mayo on them, so I could not eat my food. Dad's argument was always "if the truckers eat there, it must be OK." Nothing against truckers' tastes. It just that I think they were there to peepee and drink coffee, not eat.

[slutticus]

33. Davy Crockett's Roadhouse

http://www.tndirectory.com/crockettsroadhouse/

Yeeeeeee Hawwwwww!

[LeftyMom]

36. Crapplebees and wAwful House

The only resutaunts I've ever tossed my cookies in, and for good reason. I can't eat bland lukewarm greasy crap served on a dirty plate. Lesson learned.

At Waffle House I managed to make it to the bathroom and ralphed all over the floor, but at Crapplebees I got a bit less warning and splashed in the aisle right next to the door and within sight of quite a few diners (the place was packed for some reason I'll never understand.)

BTW, I don't know a single female California native who has eaten at Waffle House without throwing up. I think maybe it's because we aren't used to the grease.

JJ North's and Hometown Buffet get dishonorable mention, for nastiness without the nausea.

[UdoKier]

37. I like Luby's

I also like Furr's even better, since it's all you can eat.

They are inexpensive and you can at least get a wide variety of food there, including vegetables - more than you can say for fast food joints.

They don't have them here in CA, so we occasionally go to Hometown Buffet - which CAN be a disgusting trough, but the better ones serve pretty good food.

Same with Golden Corral - varies from tasty to disgusting.

[last_texas_dem]

42. I like Luby's too

Good food for the most part, good variety, relatively inexpensive. Cafeterias and buffets are some of my favorites; I've never quite figured out what it was I wasn't "supposed" to like about them but they do seem to have their fair share of people who dislike them.

[lcdnumber6]

127. I wish Luby's was in Seattle

I respectfully disagree with the original poster's comparison of Luby's to slop. Whenever I visit my dad in Dallas, we have a mandatory Luby's lunch. period. Luby's is not slop. You want slop? Go to Furrs (yes please be careful ye who love the "all you can eat"), or go to the local middle school cafeteria in Harris County, preferably outside of incorporated Houston.

I also wish Taco Cabana was the reigning franchise for fast Mexican food in the Pacific NW! mmm black bean nachos! aaaagghghggh

[sakabatou]

43. McDonald's

They were renovating at the time... also they were doing construction during the time I was there. You can hear the hammers a mile away.

[Cadence]

44. This little local dive place called the Turkish Kabob

it was very tiny in the front, just a counter with two stools and the cooking area. They sat us in the "back" which was this weird area with four tables set up. Missing drywall, ants on the floor running up the walls, filthy tablecloth, visible dirt on the floor. I told my friend we're not staying here. He goes we already ordered, the guys making the food. So we went out and told him we wanted it to go. I wouldn't eat my sandwich but my friend did. He said it was good. :shrug: I just figured if someone didn't see anything wrong with sitting customers in an area like that... he's probably not going to be all that concerned with hand washing, proper cooking or refrigeration. I've had severe food poisoning from a restaurant before. I'm a little bit afraid.

[arwalden]

48. Homophobic Anti-Gay Cracker Barrel

[ArkDem]

64. The food is great, however.

[ThorsHammer]

72. I like their food too

[arwalden]

87. I'm Not Willing To Support Them To Find Out For Myself...

I'll just have to take everyone else's word for it, while wondering if they just aren't AWARE of Cracker Barrel's discriminatory practices... or if they *know*, but just don't CARE. :shrug: (Sigh.)

-- Allen

[ThorsHammer]

91. What did they do?

This thread was the first I had heard of anything.

[arwalden]

94. Whoops!! PIE ON MY FACE!!

I was searching for a link to give you about their policy of firing employees who failed to "demonstrate normal heterosexual values."

It turns out that the Cracker Barrel board of directors recently voted to add "sexual orientation" to the company's non-discrimination policy statement.

I had missed hearing about it and gave you outdated news.

My apologies!

-- Allen

[ThorsHammer]

96. Thanks, I didn't know that

That is definitely a discriminatory policy, especially since it has no bearing on the job. Glad to hear they've fixed it though. I had always thought sexual orientation was a protected class.

[DancingBear]

95. What can one possibly like about Cracker Barrel?

a) They might as well post sign at the main entrance that says "we're homophobic - if you are too, come on in!"

b) The average patron can be described as 65 years old, 5'8", 290 lbs. and shaped like two pears placed bottom to bottom, then stapled at the waist

c) Everything on the menu is cooked in butter, then buttered, then sauteed in butter, then buttered, then grilled with butter, then buttered.

We won't even begin to mention the big dollars they give to Republican candidates...

[ArkDem]

99. I understand now. We aren't supposed to use factual information.

I'm sorry however that you dislike elderly and obese people.

[SonofMass]

102. Not to mention dairy products.

[DancingBear]

108. I'm sorry you've lost your sense of humor

you're welcome back when you find it. :)

You're right - I hate the elderly, the infirmed, the obese, you name it, I hate it.

Geez, spare us, will ya...

Belated kudos to Cracker Barrel for adding "sexual orientation" to their non-discrimination policies, BTW. I, too, stand corrected re: their previous policies. I'm still pretty sure they are almost 100% red in their political contributions, however.

Still doesn't excuse all that damn butter though...

[donheld]

111. You make it sound like Barbra Streisand is head chef

Like butta. ;)

[ArkDem]

115. That was humor

:eyes:

[pres2032]

103. i love the Cracker Barrel

and yet i don't match any of your descriptions of the usual patron. i guess I'm an oddity.

[ScreamingMeemie]

114. Ahhh...come to my house, Allen. I make a carbon copy of their corned

beef hash and hash brown casserole...without the helping of homophobia on the side. :hi:

[arwalden]

116. Mmmm. Mmmm!

I'll be right over... keep a plate warm in the oven for me.

[bloodyjack]

49. Cici's pizza

Very bad. The pizza tastes like semen.

[ArkDem]

52. Don't know if I'd admit to being an authority on that!

[Jeff in Cincinnati]

62. But the pizza is truly wretched

20 different varieties and they all suck.

You know the old joke about pizza and sex being alike? When it's great it's fabulous and when it's bad it's still pretty darned good. Cici's is like really bad sex...

[theboss]

67. I went there once

I figured, "How bad can a $4 pizza buffet be?"

The answer: pretty fucking bad.

I don't like Sbarros either.

[livinginphotographs]

100. My brother came up with the witty name of "Feces Pizza."

Obviously, it didn't taste like semen to him, but you get the idea.

[Phentex]

130. I've been to one once....

and I would never go back. We had neighbors who wanted us to join them there and that's the only reason we tried it.

The all-you-can-eat places have never been something I'd seek out.

[Jessica]

51. Eat'n Puke ... *ahem* ... Park

So gross. x(

[Hand]

54. White Castle!

"Buy 'em by the bag..." Just don't eat the damn things or you'll die!

:puke:

[Jeff in Cincinnati]

63. BLASPHEMER!!

Of course they make you sick...that's part of their charm. It would be like complaining the the merry-go-round gets you dizzy!

[Hand]

71. Wot, me??

I would think that White Castle would wear this distinction as a badge of honor! "White Castle--Voted Most Disgusting by Democratic Underground! This week only--Buy 'em by the BARREL! We made too many last week and you're the winner!"...

:puke:

[XNASA]

56. Casa Bonita in Denver.

I literally puked.

[fishwax]

65. As a kid, Casa Bonita was the highlight of trips to Denver

The cliffdivers, and Black Bart's cave ... hard to top. A few years ago I went back there as an adult and (while I didn't puke) was certainly not as impressed.

[XNASA]

69. I had gone there once many years ago, with a group of adults...

And though I wasn't wow'ed, It was alright. Service was OK, etc.

Then......I went there about 5 years ago with the in-laws from Littleton. Absolutely the single worst dining experience...make that single worst experience of any kind that I've ever had in my life.

Waited for hours, terrible service, the food was worse than dog food, the place was filthy. Put us in a windowless room full of screaming kids...........etc, etc...

[musette_sf]

81. dammit, you would think

that Cartman's recommendation would MEAN something!!!!

[huskerlaw]

97. Absolutely...A-W-F-U-L. n/t

[yardwork]

57. Sonny's Real Pit Barbeque

I'd do just about anything to avoid ever having to eat at one again.

[Seabiscuit]

58. Rubella's

[Maddy McCall]

85. God, a restaurant named after a disease. Can't be good.

:-)

[Seabiscuit]

104. Just kidding. Sounds kind of like "Ruby's".

:-)

[terrya]

59. "Waffle House"

Ewwwwwwwww.

[CO Liberal]

133. A Bunch of Us Agree With You

See my Post #6 above.

[mopinko]

61. not naming names

out of respect for the many many good things that the lefty ownership does. most lefties on the north side of chicago know this place.
but man, does the restaurant suck. the service is the worst. i have known numerous people who have contracted food borne illnesses there, and i have taken a bite out of things that i had to spit out in fear.
but the last straw for me was looking around during a meal there and noticing that the 1' dia. glass globes on the hanging lights looked funny. closer examination showed that they had 2" of dead flies in them. all 10 or so of them in the whole place.
:puke:

[theboss]

68. I give you: the Pennsylvania turnpike rest areas

Anyone who has driven the turnpike knows what I'm talking about. There's only like 20 exits on the entire road, and most of them lead to nowhere. So you are trapped on this thing for a good six hours. And the only food options are these refugee stations filled with dirty and crowded Sbarros, Roy Rogers, Bob Big Boys, and Cinnabun.

In fairness, it's hard to go wrong with a Cinnabun.

[seg4527]

76. i know that all to well

it's a killer when there are like 40 miles between exits too. time drags on forever.

[NoSheep]

73. Stuckey's n/t

[Joe Power]

79. Luby's takes the prize

ICK!

[Nailzberg]

82. PINKS

Now this is a local place, so outside of LA, no one has had the disgust of eating one of their dogfood meals.

But if you visit the area, stay away from the corner of Melrose and La Brea. Worst shit you could put in your body. And this isn't a prejudice against hotdogs themselves, I love a Vienna beef dog dragged through the garden and served on a poppy seed bun. But PINKS is the most god awful thing I've ever seen. And tourists line up for blocks like they're ready to drink the kool-aid.

[GRLMGC]

126. Ewww

Like, I don't even eat hotdogs but seeing my friend attempt to eat one made me want to puke. He said that when he bit into it, rather than breaking off, it simply compressed. That's fucking nasty.

[rbnyc]

88. Friend of a Farmer in Manhattan

I used to work there. Not only were employees treated terribly, but the mouse and roach infestation was just beyond anything I'd ever seen or heard of, ever, in my entire experience upon the Earth.

I wouldn't even touch my face with my hands while I was at work. That's how much mouse shit I cam in contact with.

We used to keep cups stacked behind the counter for to-go coffee. We used to have to break down the cups, clean, and replace them several times an hour because that's how fast the cups would become inhabited with dozens of roaches.

Once, a slab of bacon was left out overnight and was infested with roaches and huge water bugs. The prep cooks were afraid of what the owners would do to them if they had to throw it away. So they cleaned it off, cooked it up and served it!!

Besides all that, the owners and management deserve to rot in hell because of the serious abuses that went on in that hole!

Never eat there!

[B Calm]

105. McDonalds

[Taverner]

106. TGI Fridays

Horrible horrible food

[NuttyFluffers]

129. for the love of god what is with their sauce?!?!

jack daniels sauce my ass! jack is pissed and wants you to give back his whiskey!

ugh! and they drown everything in that gunk!

hey! let's get a cup of bull's eye, a shot of jack, and 3 caramalized cups of sugar!!! yeah! that'll be tasty! let's make sure our customers teeth rot before they finish the meal, maybe it'll force them to drink more booze to stop the gingivitis bleeding!

dear lord! get that fly strip tack away from me!

[noonwitch]

139. They were good when they first opened, but have really gone down hill

in the past ten years or so.

When they opened in the 80s, I used to love their food. The last time I went there, I had a hamburger that didn't taste very good and was very greasy. I had some french onion soup that was really nasty, too.

[Emops]

107. The Golden Lamb in my hometown, Lebanon, Ohio.

Lord, their food is awful. They get by on historical value alone (oldest inn in Ohio).

I find it funny that they're bragging about all the famous people who've been there (12 presidents including The Monkey, Mark Twain, Charles Dickens), but most of them have remarked how much they disliked it!

[Magrittes Pipe]

144. Oh, dear God, the Golden Lamb.

My father used to drag me there... on days when he'd drag me to the track. :cry:

[curse10]

113. KFC

Although Cracker Barrell and Taco Bell and McDonalds are close

[nytemare]

119. "Krystals"

They sell little hamburgers, which I call "Bochul Burgers". They are burgers I only eat about once every 3 or 4 years, when I really get a craving, because most times I have them they make me yack.

Greasy little burgers, they are.

[AVID]

125. ate 22 krystals one VERY stoned night in 1986

man they wee good

[bliss_eternal]

121. Dennys and KFC

hand's down. KFC used to be SO much better. I don't understand the decline of their chicken, but I'm certain the Col. is rolling over in his grave. That is the grossest chicken EVER! Don't get me started on their 'mashed potatoes.' It is the foulest substance I've ever attempted to digest.

I'm getting nauseous thinking about it....

[Scout1071]

122. I'm guilty of the occasional late night Moons over MiHammy

What can I say?

[Wcross]

137. Denny's

It has to have the WORST menu.

[twenty2strings]

140. Dixie Cafe...Crappy chicken fried steak...cold gravy. Southern nostalgia

Strange 50's retro party room...Not even trying.

[LynneSin]

141. Any of those Chinese Restaurant Bacteria Buffets

First, I can't figure out how some of them make any money with all that food out there and many times an empty restaurant. Plus, as a rule of thumb, I avoid buffets. Too many times I see folks eating directly from the buffet line or coughing into the food.

:scared:

[burythehatchet]

142. that's good

I remember I used to go to a chinese buffet with friends and it was so vile. Once I bit into something from the sweet and sour chicken that I proclaimed was a chicken beak. Thereon we would signify our lunch intentions by "getting some beaks"

[Magrittes Pipe]

147. Ancient Chinese Pizza.

I went to a Chinese buffet in Milwaukee that had pizza. PIZZA!

It was some frozen crap that had been sitting under the heat lamps for at least 3 days.

I had to try a piece.

[Earth_First]

145. NICK TAHOUS -Rochester, New York

Main AND Lyell. MAN, I love that place!

[Wcross]

153. Give me the garbage plate!!!!!

I used to live in Rochester. Nick's was a regular stop. I can't even get zwiglers white hots down here in Tennessee. Whats your favorite pizza joint in town? I used to LOVE TK's pizza in downtown Fairport. They make the best pizza I have ever had.
Down here they only have the chain pizza places and they all suck!

[ze_dscherman]

149. GDR motorway rest stops

Back in the old German Democratic Republic days, next to the Autobahn one had to use to reach Berlin from West Germany. I remember unsalted potatoes with black parts, boiled to mush, LOTS of rancid oil poured over them, red cabbage with some vinegar and sugar, somehow resembling cabbage-tasting-marmalade, and some greasy pork something with instant brown sauce. Service? Next to the friendliness of a jail warden. But clean, and, to western standards, cheap.

Sometimes captitalist market competition IS good ...

[Arkana]

150. Cracker Barrel in Sturbridge, MA

How they thought terrible Southern food would have any appeal in New England's heartland is anyone's guess, but I remember eating a burger that was so awful it was like chewing on cardboard and Silly Putty.

[ArkDem]

152. It's was only terrible because southerners weren't cooking it.

[GregW]

151. Taco Bravo - SF South Bay area

While eating the Nachos grande my ex-GF says, "These jalapenos taste funny". I scoff, thinking how can something as fiery as a jalapeno POSSIBLY go bad.

I was wrong.

Have you ever thrown up partially digested hot peppers, who do their best to stay lodged in the delicate tissues of the inside of your nose.

:puke:

[achtung_circus]

155. It's a toss-up

between th Road Kill Grille and Wally's House of Smegma.

[Merrick]

157. If my kitchen were a restaurant, that'd be it

My rotten cooking is rivalled only by the crappiness of my service. I've never tipped myself once.