mitch hedberg quotes

[inflection]

"I wrote a letter to my dad - I wrote, "I really enjoy being here," but I accidentally wrote rarely instead of really. But I still wanted to use it so i crossed it out and wrote, "I rarely drive steamboats, dad - there's a lot of shit you don't know about me. Quit trying to act like I'm a steamboat operator." This letter took a harsh turn right away..."

"I was at this casino minding my own business, and this guy came up to me and said, "You're gonna have to move, you're blocking a fire exit." As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammible and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit."

- Mitch Hedberg

[Bunny]

1. Out of all the people who have died recently, I mourn Mitch the most.

Funny guy...

[ghostsofgiants]

3. Mitch is second to Hunter Thompson

But I mourn Mitch much more than the others.

[DS1]

2. Great point on #2

I love rice. Rice is good for when you're hungry, and you want to eat a thousand of something.

[Midnight Rambler]

4. "I think Pringles original intention was to make tennis balls."

"And on the day the ruber was supposed to arrive, a truckload of potatoes showed up instead. And Pringles is a laid back company, so they said, 'Fuck it, chop 'em up!'"

[ghostsofgiants]

5. If you're lost in the woods...fuck it, build a house

"Well, I was lost, but now I live here. I have seriously improved my predicament."