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"Cost of Living Now Outweighs Benefits" -- The Onion.

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GOPBasher Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Apr-13-05 02:02 PM
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"Cost of Living Now Outweighs Benefits" -- The Onion.
This thing is cracking me up. I can't stop laughing. I just had to share with the Lounge. (I guess this is the consequence of 5 years of Bush? :shrug:)


Cost of Living Now Outweight Benefits

A report released Monday by the Federal Consumer Quality-Of-Life Control Board indicates that the cost of living now outstrips life's benefits for many Americans.


"This is sobering news," said study director Jack Farness. "For the first time, we have statistical evidence of what we've suspected for the past 40 years: Life really isn't worth living."

To arrive at their conclusions, study directors first identified the average yearly costs and benefits of life. Tangible benefits such as median income ($43,000) were weighed against such tangible costs as home-ownership ($18,000). Next, scientists assigned a financial value to intangibles such as finding inner peace ($15,000), establishing emotional closeness with family members ($3,000), and brief moments of joy ($5 each). Taken together, the study results indicate that "it is unwise to go on living."



More: http://theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4115&n=1

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Lavender Brown Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Apr-13-05 02:04 PM
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1. heh
the headline "Bystander Stops To Watch Incompetent Parallel-Park Job" had me cracking up this morning.
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ET Awful Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Apr-13-05 02:04 PM
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2. You beat me to it, I was just getting ready to post this :)
Hehehehe, I think any extensive cost/benefit ratio analysis would reach the same conclusion :).
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GOPBasher Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Apr-13-05 02:05 PM
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3. I think you're right. :-) n/t
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