Introducing a new cat to an older cat?

[Meldread]

Okay, so I have a few cats. I have two indoor cats and about 15 out door cats which live around my home. Most of them are strays and drop offs that managed to find sanctuary at my home and are somewhat wild. (I live in the country so there is PLENTY of room for all of them). However, several months ago we had three new arrivals: A Mother and two Kittens. No one knows who they belong to and no one has come asking for them, and although the mother occasionally wanders off the kittens seem to be content to live here and not follow her. There is one kitten, however, who I want to bring into my home. He is extremely tame, which is why I think he used to belong to someone else.

Inside the home there is one male and female cat. They've been spayed, neutered, and declawed (not my idea :()... and I want to introduce them to the most adorable kitten in the world who my 2 and a half year old nephew absolutely loves. He gets a vet check up this week, and once he's given a clean bill of health I am thinking of introducing him to the life of luxury.

All three cats have totally different personalities. The Kitten is a completely submissive male, who just loves attention and affection. He enjoys being held, and even as my young nephew plays a bit rough with him he won't hiss, try to claw, or even try and run away. (He loves attention THAT much.) He's solid black with the exception of his four feet and around his mouth where it is snow white. Thus he has been dubbed "Boots".

The Female Indoor cat isn't originally mine. It belonged to my sister, who couldn't take her with her when she moved, and before that she belonged to someone else. We used to let her go outside before being declawed but had an incident where she wandered off and didn't show up again for 10 days. We think something horrible happened to her during that time because she has never been right since. She is completely skittish around people, even those she trusts, hates loud noises, hates strangers, hates sudden movements, has horrible mood swings, and even hates the other Indoor Male Cat. If cats dream, I also think she has nightmares. She is about 6 years old.

The Male Indoor Cat is about 5 years old, and was born from a litter that lives around here. He was originally an outdoor cat who was brought into the home. As he has gotten older he has gotten more reclusive and "testy", meaning that he really doesn't like all that much attention. (Unless, of course, it involves his good food. He'll do anything for his good food.) He's not ideal for my nephew to play with because he scares him to death. He becomes irritable and even some what aggressive. My nephew loves him, though, and likes to hug him (he's on the fluffy side)... but just being near my nephew freaks him out and I'm always afraid that he'll try and bite him.

That brings Boots back into the picture. I can conceive of the male eventually warming up to Boots, but the female... it isn't likely. In fact I tried showing her Boots and well... let's just say she wasn't happy and wouldn't let me put my hands on her for about two days. The female is rather attached to me, and only really "trusts" me around her. She sleeps with me every night, and I feel some what guilty bringing another cat into the home, mostly because I know having the kitten will take up some of the attention I would otherwise give to her. I don't want to see her suffer further emotional damage, because aside from being rather crazy and not right in the head, she really is a sweet heart. (You just have to get to know her to find that out...)

So... does anyone have any suggestions on dealing with this rather unusual problem? :P

[flowomo]

1. part of the magic of cats....

is their total indifference to what you want. You can't make them like or dislike anything. They just have their own minds about everything. We always have 4 or 5 cats of different ages, and as the old ones die, we bring in new ones. Right now, we have 2 new kittens and two old ones. The oldest just ignores them, despite their best efforts to play with him or snuggle with him. The other, second-oldest, beats the shit out of any new arrival for about two weeks and then puts them on ignore.

[Meldread]

2. Yeah, I am worried about that.

Boots is extremely friendly, and the cats outside, while skittish around people, are EXTREMELY affectionate with one another. I'll likely transition Boots from being indoor/outdoor in the beginning at least until the two indoor cats get used to him. However, knowing his personality I am pretty certain he'll want to remain indoors 24/7. He is perfectly content for someone just to hold him all the time. Literally. He'll remain in your arms for hours on end without moving, just purring and occasionally rubbing his head against your hand to get you to pet and stroke him. I've never met a cat who enjoyed affection so much, which is one of the reasons I think he is perfect for my nephew.

My nephew loves him because he doesn't really try and run away, and he is small enough where he can pick him up. He loves Boots to death, and it is rather cute to watch them curl up together in the floor and go to sleep.

Anyway, I'm not so much interested in getting her to "like" the kitten and I'm not so worried about them fighting. I don't think Boots would actually fight back, but if he had to defend himself he DOES have his claws where as the two adults do not. He is also large enough now where they shouldn't be able to easily do him too much harm. I've been waiting for him to get a bit bigger to bring him indoors for that very reason.

I am mostly concerned about the female. I don't think the male will mind to much, and I think eventually they might befriend each other as when he was a kitten he was social around other cats... but unfortunately he was sentenced to a life within the home after what happened to the female cat - we didn't want him to suffer the same. Since then he has been subjected to the other cats anti-social behavior. I also think introducing the kitten might help the male become less reclusive and might even make him happier. (Once he gets over the initial jealousy.)

However, the female... well when she first saw the kitten - I just wanted to see her initial reaction. She growled, hissed, spit, wouldn't let me touch her or get near her for two days, and wouldn't interact with *ANYTHING* the kitten happened to remotely touch... and threw a temper tantrum that involved knocking over stuff on my desk and stacked DVD's near the TV. That's what she generally does when she gets really angry - she takes her paws and shoves stuff on the desk onto the floor.

Although, since then she has gotten more accustomed to the kittens scent and has smelt it on me on more than a few occasions. There were no negative reactions other than curiosity and a bit of growling. (Although growling for her is the general norm... so it's hard to tell if it is from the smell or just her personality.)

[flowomo]

3. sounds like Calvin!

And he gets reaaal pouty when we bring the dogs in.

[Meldread]

4. Yeah, she has mental problems.

I don't have a clue what happened to her but she has seriously been traumatized. I think it has resulted in her becoming a bi-polar paranoid schizophrenic.

There are times when she'll rub up against my leg, and as soon as I touch her she begins to growl. Other times, she'll come up to me seemingly wanting affection and I begin loving on her... she seems to enjoy it... and then... suddenly... she gets really angry and aggressive trying to bite and claw me with her non-existent claws. Mostly she is just content to be near me without me touching her. She likes to sleep when I am nearby, on my desk and at night in my bed.

She also HATES, I mean she TRULY HATES being picked up. Nothing will piss her off more than that, and often when she miss behaves that is her punishment. A little "time out" in my lap while I rub on her, or being picked up and carried around to the other side of the room if I don't have time for that. Either way it makes her extremely angry and annoyed.

I've only found one thing that calms her down and makes her seem completely at ease. She likes to nurse at blankets. If I bunch up a blanket and she isn't in too foul of a mood and begins to nurse... she becomes completely calm, even enjoys being held for a short time afterward, and purrs like a kitten.

Yes, this cat is crazy... but she is never boring! She is also a sweet heart once you get past the aggressive, "I hope you die, and if I had my claws I'd rip out your eyes out of their sockets for looking at me" attitude. :P

[Meldread]

5. Kick. Help? -nt-

:kick:

[friesianrider]

6. I think you'll be fine :)

We adopted a kitty earlier this year from a very high no-kill shelter and introduced her to a multi-cat household. I had a rough time, but the number one thing I can tell you is to have patience.

Since you said it was a kitten, I can say that chances are extremely good that they will be introduced no problem - as long as you neuter the kitten ASAP. If he is an unneutered young cat, he won't be viewed as a threat to the other cats. Not only will it be wise to neuter the kitten for his own health (and your sanity - no spraying!) but it is also likely to make him seem like less of a threat to the others.

The other important thing to remember is that you will want to really shower your other house cats (especially the female) with lots of love while this whole introduction is happening. They need to know that this kitten isn't taking their place. After they've had a chance to sniff the new kitten awhile, take your female into your room and close the door - just sit and pet her for awhile and watch some TV or whatever. You'll probably want to do this once a day with her - just "you and her" time.

Just be prepared for lots of hissing and carrying on at first - bit since both are declawed there is a very small chance of anyone being seriously hurt. The kitten isn't likely to challenge an adult cat, so that should be ok too.

And finally...are all your outdoors neutered/spayed? And is it possible you could trap the Momma cat and have her fixed? I volunteer at a shelter so I'm a big spay/neuter advocate :)

[Catfight]

7. I used a play pen. We turned it upside down and put one cat inside.

we put a litter box in there and food/water dish. It provided a safe environment for all the cats. The one inside the pen could smell the other cat and both cats could acclimate to each other. Then during the night when the cats could be watched, we'd let the one out of the pen to roam free. But at night we'd put him back in the play pen. It worked out great. It was a 50 dollar play pen from Target. You can probably pick one up cheaper. The vet loved the idea.

[Orsino]

8. One trick is to let them smell each other before they meet.

Keep 'em in different rooms, or don't let old cat get into the room where new cat is. After a day or two, switch the cats, still without letting them meet. Once they know each other's scents, the introduction is made easier.

I'd still let them meet only through a child gate or a similar barrier. There'll be hissing and howling, sure, but no blows need be exchanged. After all this, you can let them mix, but try to have some sanctuaries available for each to retreat to. If they aren't forced together, they can take the introduction at their own pace(s).

They'll still have to work out who's boss, and might be hissing at each other for weeks. Sooner or later, though, you'll come home quietly and catch them in the same bed--whereupon they might have to make a show of fighting.

And keep those litter boxes extremely clean and accessible throughout the process, to keep the "editorializing" to a minimum!

[StopTheMorans]

9. hi, newer cat, meet older cat; play nice you crazy fucks.

[joeybee12]

10. Wrap the kitten in a towel for a few moments to get his scent on it...

...then leave the towel around the other cats for a few days. Cats do a lot by smell, so the two older ones will have a few days to get used to the smell, so when the kitten is introduced, they are--in a sense--already used to it.