My niece finally came out to the family.

[China_cat]

Looks like her dad is going to be ok with it. Her mom will get over it. They'll just have to keep it from her Calvinist grandmother. She has a life partner that she's actually been with for a couple years now. How she managed to keep it from everyone there is the mystery.

[tjwmason]

1. Glad to hear it's going to be ok.

My parents didn't mind - despite being rather conservative - or rather they thought it irrelevant compared with their love for me.

It is always going to be a shock, and it's not homophobic to need a little time to adjust (some folk may wish to flame me for that comment) - it sounds like this is all that will be needed (except for the grandmother).

Life is probably going to get much easier for her within the family from now on.

From your tone - I'm guessing that you've been a supportive aunt. If so, major kudos to you - a person should be allowed to take the time needed to prepare, and come out when they are ready to do so. So :hug: to you and :hug: to your neice as well, and indeed :grouphug: for the whole family.

[China_cat]

4. It was rather funny

her dad's comment was 'she takes after her old man and has a thing for girls'. We certainly didn't expect to hear that.

[Tsiyu]

7. Too funny!

Sounds like he has a great sense of humor. I'm glad her honesty was met with love :)

[Jamastiene]

11. Sounds like she has an openminded dad.

More power to him and her and her partner. Bravo.

[Misunderestimator]

2. Good for her.... it's hell to lie about it to anyone...

and it's a shame that they have to keep it from her grandmother. Good for her for having the courage to live her life honestly.

[China_cat]

3. At least it won't be for too long.

Her grandmother (maternal grandmother) is old and sick and not likely to be around too much longer.

[Misunderestimator]

5. Well, that's not a good thing...

:hug: to her for that loss as well... I wish I had been close enough to any of my grandparents to have told them, or that my father hadn't thought it a good thing to keep that information from them. I accepted it because it was almost 25 years ago. I guess things haven't changed much.

[China_cat]

6. This is in Holland

For all their more 'enlightened' views, in the smaller places, Calvinism still rules very tightly. (I don't know if it's changed but the last time I was there one town didn't even allow the trains to stop there on Sundays) It's only been a few years since this woman stopped wearing the traditional Frisian klederdracht (clothing). Luckily, my niece lives and works one province over and her grandmother doesn't travel at all. Maybe not the best, but I certainly can understand. She doesn't want to make the old lady's last time miserable.

[Misunderestimator]

8. How coincidental! My paternal grandparents were in Holland too!

And yeah... I understand the reasoning... especially given the Calvinism. Better to leave it alone if it isn't necessary to discuss. It's just sad that her grandmother will never know that her granddaughter has found love and happiness.

Great picture!

[RazzleDazzle]

9. Mozeltov!

I celebrate your niece's standing in her truth and dignity and personal freedom.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

10. The hard thing for me as a parent to deal with if one of my kids

came out, would be the surprise. That would hurt. I believe if I saw it developing I'd be just fine with it. But if my son, 31, suddenly told me he was gay, I'd feel so left out of his life.

However, maybe I feel that way because it hasn't happened, and if it did it would NOT have been a surprise. If that makes any sense.

[China_cat]

12. I told my kids that I would

not be upset if they came to me and told me they were gay. When the grandkids came along I modified that a bit...I'd rather they be gay than Republican.