What's the worst line someone has used to dump you?

[Radical Activist]

Anyone who saw my thread from a week or two ago knows I have a pet peeve for the "I don't want a relationship with anyone right now so let's just be friends" line. Every woman who says that ends up with a new boyfriend a few weeks later. Its not the meanest way to end a relationship but it might be the most insincere and patronizing way.

But...I know people on this board must have waaaay better/worse stories than me. What's the lamest, meanest or funniest way someone has ended a relationship with you? I want to hear some good stories!

[Hugin]

1. "Buh-bye"

If I'm lucky.

;(

[Radical Activist]

4. Did you date David Spade?

:)

[Hugin]

19. Naw, she was a flight attendant.

;)

[taterguy]

2. saw a note that I wasn't supposed to see on her fridge

[Deja Q]

3. The lack of dialogue entirely.

The sad part is, half the creeps claimed to be liberals too.

[Radical Activist]

5. You mean, those too cowardly to pick up the phone and break up?

[Deja Q]

6. Or face-to-face.

But they're only human.

[BikeWriter]

7. "One man is as good as another." after ten years of "Forever Love."

[Radical Activist]

10. That's pretty

fucked up.

[bif]

8. "You suck as a person"

[Radical Activist]

9. Well that's pretty direct and to the point.

I would laugh if someone said that to me.

[bif]

11. Actually I made that up.

I thought it'd make a great line in a movie.

[Squatch]

12. I didn't know what to say after your dad died, so Goodbye.

(from my ex-fiancee). Kinda rattled my world about 1 week after my dad died.

[Radical Activist]

13. What the hell does that mean?

She dumped because she wasn't articulate? :wtf:

[Squatch]

15. She was looking for an excuse.

Still, pretty shitty, eh?

[Love Bug]

14. How about, "I love you but I'm not in love with you"

BTW -- that "Let's still be friends" line is another way of saying "Please don't hate me because I dumped you." I know very few couples who remain friends later.

[Radical Activist]

16. That line should never be used past 8th grade

[Hugin]

21. Especially after the LSBF has been dropped.

It's a heinous weapon... The WMD of relationships.

:scared:

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

30. Yeah, that one's gotta be the most asinine

I call that either "I don't have a spine and can't say what I mean" or "I don't know what a mature relationship is and expect the whole first date butterflies to last forever".

[insanity]

17. I don't know if I am attracted to you sexually anymore

That was a bitch.

[TrogL]

18. I changed the locks

Which made me pretty much homeless.

[RevolutionaryActs]

20. R_A?

Let's just be friends... ;) :evilgrin:

[Radical Activist]

22. That was cold

:mad:
Its a good thing I've never asked you out.

[RevolutionaryActs]

23. LOL! I'm evil, what can I say?

:7



You know I loves ya. :loveya:

[x-g.o.p.er]

24. Let's see other people...

so we know that what we have is real.

I laughed my ass off, right in her face.

[tigereye]

25. I did once break up with a guy after a Betty Freidan lecture

(ROP Betty) and I think I told him he was too conservative for me, or something. ;)

[In_The_Wind]

26. It's time to let go.

That's the break-up message I received by email.

I'm sure someone can top It's time to let go but it hurt like hell!

[henslee]

27. I'm so confused.

[AllegroRondo]

28. "Im sorry, I cant, dont hate me" on a post it note

but it got me out of a ticket later.

[mdmc]

29. welcome to dumpsville - population ... you...

Man, don't fuck with feminist republicans... She had every right to dump my slacker ass, but... DAMN! (and I still love her)!

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

31. "I cheated on you with someone halfway across the country...

and even though I've only seen him a couple of times in person and he's going to jail for DUI, I'm moving there to be with him."

Okay, I paraphrased a bit, but that's the line I got.

[RevCheesehead]

32. "I'll call you - soon."

After a week went by, I finally figured out he wasn't going to call... and he never did.

[laheina]

43. That one's bad

I would prefer a clean break over that any day.

[no name no slogan]

33. I haven't loved you in years

and I don't want to talk about it-- I want a divorce.

True story

:rofl:

[Xithras]

34. "My friends just dont like you"

It was heartbreaking at the time since we were actually engaged, but in retrospect it was probably the best thing that ever happened to me. I can't imagine where that marriage would have ended up.

[Hugin]

37. Ouch!

Translation: "If my friends ate dynamite and jumped off a bridge... I'd join them."

[Hong Kong Cavalier]

35. "I'm not in love with him..."

"...but I will be."

Said to me by my last serious girlfriend after she'd met this guy. (I was going to ask her to marry me that December...three months after she broke up with me.)

[Lydia Leftcoast]

36. "We're not communicating anymore"

This was after he had been giving me the silent treatment for two weeks.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

38. I was compared to a vegetable

"You know how sometimes if you eat broccoli everyday, you start to get tired of it, even though it's your favorite vegetable. Well, I'm just getting kind of tired of it. I don't like you any less. I just want to go and try new things."

What made it even more lame was when I found out that her last boyfriend used it to dump her. Then, she used it on me. When her mom found out the line, she yelled at her. BTW, I'm still extremely close to her family, considering her parents my "adopted" parents. They still say that they want me for a daughter-in-law, even though their daughter broke up with me like seven years ago.

[Left Is Write]

39. "I can't marry you. I'm not in love with you. I love your brownies...

I'd marry your brownies."

[leftofthedial]

40. "I just can't take all the great sex anymore."

and then there was, "You're just too smart and sensitive for me."

[hunter]

41. "I'm married and I'm getting back together with my husband..."

She'd told me she was divorced. In fact, she had seperated from her husband to go to grad school. He didn't want her to go, and she did anyways, but I guess he changed his mind about that.

The only other bad breakup I had we were fighting and I jumped out of her moving car. She sent my stuff back to me in a box without a note.

Not bad things, either breakup, however hurt I was at the time, as I did go on to marry my wife.

[KamaAina]

42. "I've decided to major in Chinese and I really need to study"

She should've laid off the freakin' No-Doz. She ended up moving to Hong Kong and getting married there.

Say, are there any updates on the bird flu situation? :evilgrin:

[Chovexani]

44. I was a real bitch to my ex-girlfriend

I left a mix CD with a whole bunch of breakup songs in her apartment. "Another One Bites the Dust", "Hit the Road Jack" etc.

She deserved it though, she cheated on me.

[Merrick]

45. "Get your broke, cancer ridden ass the fuck out of my house"

so much for "For richer or poorer and in sickness and in health..." :(

[mikita]

46. "I need to find myself " ...

Geez, no better line than that after 23 years?.....

[WolverineDG]

47. "you've made me a better person"

"i've learned a lot about how to treat my next girlfriend."

:wtf: DO I LOOK LIKE A SET OF TRAINING WHEELS????? :grr:

:hi: ra, hope you're feeling better after having the "let's just be friends" bomb dropped on ya.

dg

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

48. "I think we should see other people."

Trite as hell, right up there with "I love you like a friend." Which followed immediately after.

Douchebag.

[Debi]

49. She's pregnant, so we have to break up...

I didn't even know he was dating someone else!!!

[hunter]

50. Is anyone else worried their ex_s might post here?

There's always two sides...

[Chovexani]

51. My most recent used to post here occasionally

Mainly to banter with me in the Lounge. He has a very low post count.

Story I told wasn't about him though. :shrug:

[skygazer]

52. "I really care about you a lot but...."

This was less than 24 hours after the last time he told me he loved me madly. The kicker I think was that I'd gotten on his case about how little time he spent at home (he'd go to work, come home, nap and leave again - sometimes I didn't see him for a couple of days with no phone call - turned out he was dealing drugs and I was well rid of him but it hurt at the time).

[RetroLounge]

53. I'm gay and sleeping with your friend...

RL

[hunter]

56. Well that was the reason, but it wasn't the line.

We were young and stupid and not sure it wasn't something God might fix.

If I was picking any particular reason to hate religion, that would be it.

Ours would've been a marriage sanctioned by the Church and forged in hell.

[RetroLounge]

57. It was actually both the reason and the line...

not much you can say to that...

RL

[Crazy Dave]

54. Are there any good ones?

For the person one the receiving end.

[Inspired]

55. I don't want to have sex with you anymore

[MiniMandaRuth]

58. "You're pretty, but not as pretty as her."

Some jack-ass dumped my best friends big sister, who has nice, natural beauty, for a Paris Hilton wannabe. The kicker? The 'new girl' loves to hang onto his wallet, steal from him, steal from stores, pig out, then bitch about how her life sucks.