DU LADIES:

[ForrestGump]

Um. Nothing, really. I was just hoping for some crumbs that might spill over from Mr Shortbus' thread, but without the bruisings that he received.



In case you're interested, though, you should know that I like sitting in front of a nice fire (usually slack-jawed, watching the bright-colored fire engines), long walks on the beach (usually armed with Vaseline and high-power binoculars so that I can spy on naturists), and jello wrestling with peccaries (actually, I can't really qualify that one). My measurements are 45-38-41 Kelvin. I am 0.001056048 nautical miles tall.

And this is my Sign:

[supernova]

1. HAHAHA!

My, ain't you the studly one!

[ForrestGump]

4. :-)

A rhetorical question, of course.

Studly is as studly does......

[supernova]

8. Kelvin?

So are you in a gaseous or solid state?

[ForrestGump]

20. Oh, baby, you know it's a solid state

though I did eat beans and peppers for lunch, so that could always change.....

[supernova]

28. Well, I like 'em solid

:D

And I prefer astrolube to vaseline! ;-)

[ForrestGump]

29. All right......makign a note

Sounds like some product out of the Jetsons, though......

[supernova]

36. Actually it's

Astroglide. *slaps forehead*

So, what are you looking for?

[ForrestGump]

38. Well, I'm looking for Astroglide, now

but what're the odds that I'm going to walk out of the shop with a lawn-sized waterslide?

Actually, I still haven't found what I'm looking for, to coin an original phrase. It'd help if I had even half a clue as to what it was that I was looking for but hadn't yet found, I suppose....

[GOPisEvil]

2. Peccaries?

Like this guy?


I know someone with some in her back yard, but you jell-o wrestle them, she might get annoyed.

[supernova]

3. thanks, I didn't know what

a peccary (sp?) is.

[GOPisEvil]

6. Collared peccaries are more commonly known as javelina. nt

[ForrestGump]

7. Oh, jeez, really?

Nope, that's not what they were.

Must have been some other thing like that - a peccadillo?

[supernova]

11. Sure you don't mean this guy?

[ForrestGump]

15. Nope...wasn't that, either

They looked kind of like furry versions of Danny DeVito. I can't explain it.

[GOPisEvil]

12. How about a peck o' armadilloes?

[trof]

14. That's the one that lives under my deck.

I swear.

[GOPisEvil]

19. Also part of the title to one of my favorite books.

"The only things in the middle of the road are yellow lines and dead armadilloes (or is it armadillos)? Anyway, it's a great book by Jim Hightower!

[short bus president]

16. can I get a pickeled peck

of armadillo peckers, please? They're over there next to the mountain oysters...

[ForrestGump]

21. Think of your simulated female private parts!

Leprosy could make it difficult for you to give them the required attention. It's not worth it, dude.

[ForrestGump]

18. Dude! Back away from it!

The official Texas State Roadkill (poor little fellas) can carry leprosy. Parts of you may already be in danger of dropping off!

[jus_the_facts]

5. yikes......it'd be more like....

...."Run FROM Forrest...RUN!" :evilgrin:

[ForrestGump]

9. Well, that's been said before

:-)

Too many times, actually!

[jus_the_facts]

25. I got somethin' for ya Forrest.......

:*


:loveya:

[ForrestGump]

31. Ah, yes....SOMEONE knows the way to a man's heart

Did I ever tell you the one about life, how it's like........

Huh. I can't remember what it's like right now.




"I ate some"

[jus_the_facts]

26. double your pleasure double your fun......

.....LOL this posted twice...with the DU2 ya never know what you're gonna get! :D

[ForrestGump]

32. That's right! It's like a box of......um

Wow! Two boxes of chocolate! This is a good day.

[jus_the_facts]

51. OMG!!!!! Forrest......this is *THE* perfect gift...from me to you.........

:loveya:

[ForrestGump]

52. Oh, boy!

And I can even chew myself free!

But who says I'd want to be freed?

[jus_the_facts]

55. ....well ya know.....

....they'd probably just melt off all by themselves! :evilgrin:

[ForrestGump]

56. Yeah, but where's the fun in that?

Guess it depends what's cuffed, too :o

[jus_the_facts]

57. well it'd depend on what was cuffed......

...and all the *heat* that is being generated...gives a whole new meaning to the term *death by chocolate* :evilgrin:

[ForrestGump]

58. But what a way to go

Could lead to some seriously interesting games of Twister, though, if you tried to get out of them before they were soft enough. The cuffs, I mean.

[Lady Freedom]

10. Poor Forrest...

Need a little TLC?

[ForrestGump]

13. The Learning Channel?

Um - not right now, thanks, but if you'd kindly embrace me and press my poor little head against your bosom I'm sure that I'd feel a little you don't want to know what I was going to say better.

:o

[Lady Freedom]

17. Don't be to sure...

remember that I was the one that said I was a Naughty DEM.!

[ForrestGump]

23. I like dem naughty ones

We're all naughty, though, or we'd have assimilated.

Ooh - I said 'ass' :D That's just how naughty I am.......

[leftist_rebel1569]

22. LOL...

what's sad is I might end up like you...

But, I still have hope. being 15 and all...

[ForrestGump]

24. That's true

Something to aspire to!

Just stay away from those armadillos, or you might not make 16. Well, some of you might, but not all of you.

[SOteric]

27. Yes, Forrest...?

Oh. Well then. 'Nothing' backatchya.

[GOPisEvil]

30. He's mad because you disciplined him...

...oh wait, usually he likes that sort of thing...

*mumbles, looks confused*

[ForrestGump]

35. Dude, that's a very natural look for you - don't change a thing!

Besides, it took me forever to get out of those handcuffs and I hurt my wrists. I didn't know she was gonna use real ones! For goodness sake....

Oh - that might have been a dream. There is that distinct possibility......

[SOteric]

37. And y'all think

we're the illogical ones. :shrug:

[GOPisEvil]

39. Eh...it's been a long day.

3 minutes and I am OUTTA HERE!! :bounce:

[SOteric]

41. I hope it gets better for you.

*smooch*

[GOPisEvil]

43. It just has gotten better!

Now...off to the gym!

Hasta la vista! :hi:

[ForrestGump]

46. Well, isn't that just

precious.......come into my thread and you lay a smoochie on him.....again.

I see what's going on here.....there's something going on here......and I see what it is.

Harumph, I say. Harumph.


Girls.........

[SOteric]

48. Well, hey, dude.

It's not like you ever wander into my threads and offer up smoochies.

[ForrestGump]

53. Um, well, uh

I sorta thought it was like, you know, implicit. You know: "here I am, Forrest, lay a smoochie on me (please) or, if you prefer, (please) allow me to lay one 'pon you (though mine are more likely to veer away from the cheek, I must warn you)."

Slowly I learn....

[ForrestGump]

44. Well, yeah, of course.

Like.....duh.








I've done it again, haven't I.....

[SOteric]

45. Yeah.

That's sexy.

[ForrestGump]

49. Perhaps I need classes on this stuff

And don't you dare say "mere class would suffice," 'cos I know you want to say that. Oo, I just know it. C'mon admit it.......

[SOteric]

50. Nope.

Wasn't gonna say it. :P

[ForrestGump]

54. Well, shoot

I thought I finally had you figured.

As if!

:P

[ForrestGump]

33. :-(

I repeat.

:-(

Seems to me like a good bosom-pressing is in order here......

:-(

[ScreamingMeemie]

34. I'd love to, but it sounds like I pretty much already have one kind of

like you, sitting here in the lazy-boy, staring slack jawed at the pretty colors on T.V. Would you believe it's the Poker World Series?
I didn't know they had things like that. Good luck in your endeavors

Fondly, MrsGrumpy

[ForrestGump]

42. Thanks, MrsGrumpy!!!!

Boy, if MrGrumpy gets lucky they'll follow it with the Milwaukee ten-pin bowling classic! Good luck with prising him out of that chair. Or not, of course.......maybe it's safest with him sitting right there instead of wiring the furnace to blow or doing other assorted, dangerous, male things (like leaving toilet lids up).

We're a much maligned gender, and sometimes it just all seems so very...................warranted.

[otohara]

40. You Look Like Elvis Presley

No if you were only a Capricorn, vs that other sign.

[ForrestGump]

47. Why, thank you

Thank you very much. It's a stunning resemblance, isn't it?

What's weird is that there're a couple of others around here who look just like me.

:-)

[GoddessOfGuinness]

59. heehee...

This:

plus this:

equals: One pickled peccary.

[GOPisEvil]

60. LMFAO!!!!!

:thumbsup:

That's the best laugh I've had all day!!!

[nini]

61. how old are you?

can you handle old menopausal babes?

:-)