What do you think should be done to family members who refuse to listen?

[Missy Vixen]

Poll question: What do you think should be done to family members who refuse to listen?

If you just haven't gotten enough of the Holiday Family Trainwrecks yet, let me spool out my tale of woe for your amusement.

There was a windstorm in Western Washington December 14th that knocked out power to millions here. Our power was out for a week afterwards. My sister-in-law's power didn't even flicker. The only reason we were able to stay in our house and ride the next week out was the gas fireplace, stove and hot water heater. SIL is very exacting about holiday plans -- after all, they must be Set In Stone at least a week in advance.

After explaining to her that we had no power, no e-mail (IP is still down; I'm doing this on a cell phone connection,) no home phone as a result (we have Vonage,) etcetera, she was angry that we couldn't seem to firm up those holiday plans for dinner at our house. We were told we wouldn't be getting power back until after Christmas Day. To our amazement, our power came back on late Thursday afternoon the 21st. When we called to tell her that we would love to host her for Christmas dinner, she responded that she'd "made other plans". She couldn't "depend on us".

I might also mention the chiding holiday card we received from Grandma, re: they were sheltering other family members without power, what was wrong with us? and the next chiding we received over Grandma's inviting the family over for Christmas Eve -- didn't we get the e-mail?

This brings me to my poll: What do you think would be a suitable method of revenge for this?
Julie

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1. Gets you off the hook for all future years!

[Missy Vixen]

7. Bob, you took the words right out of my mouth

I hope that your holidays were wonderful and spent with those who love you ;-)!

Julie

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9. Thanks!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

2. My dear JulieRB...........

I voted "other."

I'd disinherit them.......and find some other, more friendly types to adopt.......

Really! Honestly, I would most definitely keep my distance from those toxic people......

You deserve way, way better! :hug:

[Missy Vixen]

8. My dear CaliforniaPeggy

I'm so sorry we don't live closer to each other! :hug:

This is DH's family. I've been waiting for him to see the light for fourteen years now. I think it may have finally dawned on him. :woohoo: Between the nasty card and the SIL fit-throwing, he was pretty disconsolate over the weekend.

We'll see.

Thank you so much for your kind thoughts, and I'm sending another :hug: right back to you.

Julie

[bertha katzenengel]

3. Well, bless your heart. How miserable that must've been.

:hug:

[Missy Vixen]

10. I just keep telling myself

that there are so many others here who have it much worse than we do. I was a little breathless, though, at the sheer -- uh -- male appendages it takes to be that nasty, realize you're totally wrong, and keep doing it anyway.

I hope that your holidays are beautiful. :hug:

Julie

[SeattleGirl]

4. Why am I not surprised at your story?

I remember you telling me about your SIL, and it sounds like she's being true to form. She obviously isn't capable of seeing past the nose on her face. I know it's family and all, but there's no excuse for her attitude, and I don't think she deserves the kind of consideration you give her. Does she think the storm was somehow manufactured by you, just to inconvenience her? Oy!

And what's up with Grandma? Did she mean you should have come to her house? Or that you should have sheltered others? :shrug:

You and Mr. JulieRB are good, kind, generous people, so I'm feeling more than a little pissed at how you are being treated. I know this probably isn't the best response, but my advice is: Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke. x(

BTW, glad you got the power back. How's Mojo doing, anyway? :pals:

[Missy Vixen]

11. Ah. Just another fun-filled holiday ;-)

>Does she think the storm was somehow manufactured by you, just to inconvenience her? Oy!<

This is the best part: Even when it was proven to her over the phone last Friday night that she had not listened to either one of us and owed us both an apology, she still wouldn't back down. She called back half an hour later thinking (I'm sure,) that DH would apologize to her. He listened to her do her usual bombastic "this is all your fault," stuff and ended up hanging up on her. She, of course, will spend the next several months pouting and will never, ever apologize. The only member of his family we've heard from since Friday is one of his aunts, who's a sweetheart. We called all of them to inquire about how they were on his Blackberry the weekend of the 15th. We've yet to hear from anyone else besides the SIL and an e-mail from the nice aunt.

Grandma, I'm sure, is livid that we weren't throwing our doors open. Her favorite granddaughter (the other SIL) and her fifteen month old twins live ten miles from us now. I'm sure any inconvenience to them has made sure we are on the Family Shit List for life. We have no idea if Grandma knew anything about what was going on over here.

Thank you so much for your kind words. :cry: Really. I'll look back on this in six months and laugh.

Mojo's doing well, thank God. :party: He had his stitches out today, and he's started rassling with his brother again, so he must be almost back to normal. :woohoo:

I hope that you had a really nice holiday, and that things are going much better for you. I'm so excited about your car! :hug:

Julie

[Zavulon]

5. I voted for the smack in the head.

I've never hit a woman before, but I'd make an exception for your SIL, Julie.

[Missy Vixen]

13. But she's right!

She's right, dammit, and if we'd all just accept it and lavish apologies on her, everything would be perfect! :sarcasm:

I hope that your holidays are wonderful.
Julie

[merh]

6. I'm sorry, what'd ya say?

I wasn't listening :silly:







Sorry, poor humor, aren't you glad we aren't related? :rofl:


And let me tell you, natural disasters and dealing with personal crisis can do two things, bring out the best in people (usually total strangers) and bring out the worst in people (usually family members).

The strained relationships still exist thanks to experiencing and surviving Katrina and dealing with her destruction. I have to remind my siblings I can't prepare much in the femamobile. My revenge will be simple, being happy and not letting their silliness bother me. That works better than being angry and resentful, my heart is alot lighter than theirs. :hi:

[Missy Vixen]

12. Merh, I had to laugh!

>I wasn't listening<

No matter how unfun our lives were from December 14th to the 21st, there was an end in sight. I keep telling myself it was nothing compared to what all of you on the Gulf Coast are still experiencing. I'm wondering to myself if it made any kind of impression at all on the smug and supercilious ones here who insisted "I would have gotten myself out," etcetera. Natural disasters can happen anywhere. It's not the fault of those living in the area, and they need HELP to get back on their feet again. (We've already heard a lot of bitching and observed the eye-rolling over people here who did stuff like burn charcoal and run generators inside as a desperate attempt to keep warm. Even in a prosperous area, this caught LOTS of people completely unaware, and when people are out of option$ and frightened and sitting in a dwelling that's less than 40 degrees, they'll do some pretty inadvisable things to get themselves and their kids warm again.) The shelters, for instance, took over two days to open, if I recall. People finally gave up and started going to them after Sunday night the 17th, when the temperature dropped overnight to the low 20's.

>That works better than being angry and resentful, my heart is alot lighter than theirs.<

I need to remember this.
One thing's for sure, I'd be honored to visit the femamobile, and even more thrilled to bring whatever simple refreshments I could make or buy.

Julie

[merh]

14. So glad I could get a laugh

:9

I'd be honored to have you as a guest, but not in the femamobile, let's wait till I get a real place, sans a booth.

:hi: