Invent an offensive and completely inappropriate advertising slogan

[struggle4progress]

Example: "Jesus saves at First National Bank"

[crim son]

1. "Large-breasted women get *Lucky* with Lucky Strikes!"

hehe.

[struggle4progress]

4. With a photo of this guy?

http://img.timeinc.net.nyud.net:8090/time/time100/images/main_luciano.jpg

[Rabrrrrrr]

76. Loose Sweaters Mean Floppy Tits

[crim son]

79. Or no tits.

How would I know this?

[Rabrrrrrr]

86. It's the Lucky Strikes slogan - L.S.M.F.T.

Lucky Strikes Mean Fine Tobacco - it's on the side of the packs.

But of course the men of the world call it Loose Sweaters Mean Floppy Tits.

[Glorfindel]

90. I always heard it's "Let's Screw; My Finger's Tired"

:blush: :evilgrin:

[Rabrrrrrr]

92. LOL! I never heard that one!

Thanks!

:blush:

[crim son]

91. Oh lord. You can see I'm not a smoker.

:blush:

[LuLu550]

2. Take Kaopectate

and get your shit together.

[crim son]

80. You win.

I like.

[Robb]

3. "Jam a Twix up your ass!"

Catchy! :D

[struggle4progress]

8. I'm guessing that's the sequel to this:

http://wasimmer.de.nyud.net:8090/images/chix_dig_twix_1.jpg

[Zhade]

32. I guess we'll soon hear a similar one...

Snicker's - When Your Man Can't Satisfy!

[darkstar]

5. the more it's whipped, the bigger it gets

Oh...made up...3 Musketeers, right???? Anyone else remember?

[struggle4progress]

10. That one didn't last long. But this genuine campaign was around quite a while:

http://www.nationalsundowners.com.nyud.net:8090/images/70/cheryl_ad_large.jpg

[HuffleClaw]

83. seriously ?

thats not a parody?

[struggle4progress]

85. The ad campaign from the early 1970's lasted for several years

Monday, Nov. 15, 1971
"Fly Me"

Not long ago National Airlines began a $9.5 million advertising campaign aimed at personalizing its service. Ads picturing a lovely smiling stewardess proclaimed: "I'm Margie . Fly Me." National painted the girls' names on the noses of some of its planes—like World War II bombers—and passed out "Fly Me" buttons for the girls to wear on their uniforms.

Some National stewardesses decided that the idea amounted to a personal rather than a commercial proposition, and was a blatant sexist pitch. Three of them on a Halloween flight from New York to Miami displayed a cardboard cutout of a wrinkled witch in boots and military-type jacket with a Fly Me button. "If the ads would just say, 'Fly with me,' " complained Stewardess Ilene Held, "we'd be asking people to fly as part of our airline. It's the live stuff that gets to men, that makes them think 'let's fly with National and see what they have.' " Some stewardesses have refused to wear the buttons; Florida's Dade County Circuit Court has turned down a national women's organization request for a restraining order to ground the campaign ...

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,903213,00.html

Fly Me Again
Monday, Jun. 24, 1974

Since National Airlines took off with its "I'm Cheryl. Fly me" campaign in 1971, the sexy—and sexist—slogan has enraged feminists. It has also pulled in business. National reported a 23% increase in passengers during the first year of the campaign, nearly twice that of the industry as a whole. Having succeeded that well with sex. National is now drumming up an even more suggestive campaign scheduled for television airing this summer. The new ads feature National stewardesses looking seductively into the camera and breathing "I'm going to fly you like you've never been flown before." The film makers coach them "to say it like you're standing there stark naked." A San Francisco-based group called Stewardesses for Equal Rights is considering complaining to the Federal Communications Commission and the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission.

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,944906,00.html

[SOteric]

6. Cover your face with juice from Dicks

HAMBURGERS!!!

[struggle4progress]

13. That'd be the place where they still do the hand-whippin?

[gordontron]

37. great hamburger joint btw

goooooo Seattle!

[HCE SuiGeneris]

7. Barbizon for Bimbos -- Be your best!

[struggle4progress]

19. Is this supposed an advertisement for dimmer panels and grip lights

( http://www.barbizon.com/home/index.cfm ) with the flavor of the Ridgid Tool calendar?

http://hugo-sb.way-nifty.com.nyud.net:8090/hugo_sb/images/petty02big.jpg

Or is it an ad for the modeling school?

[Aristus]

9. "Kaopectate - It helps you get your shit together."

:popcorn:

[gr8dane_daddy]

11. My two cents...

Hell's Bealls

[Momgonepostal]

12. The Subaru Outback: It's what lesbians drive!

(don't hit me, I took this idea from another thread posted earlier today)

[struggle4progress]

15. Buy one now and you get a free toaster?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=5775853&mesg_id=5776478

[texas1928]

14. Trojan condoms...

Cause who the fuck would want kids.

[XemaSab]

17. Trojan Condoms

The condom of choice for *smart* rapists and child molesters!

[XemaSab]

16. Subaru Outback: 100,000 Lesbians Can't Be Wrong!

:D

[LynzM]

89. I bought my Outback from to lesbians in Ohio....

No joke. :)

[ironflange]

18. Olive Garden:

Best Italian food this side of Pizza Hut.

[Momgonepostal]

20. CBS Nightly News with Katie Couric...

The ONLY news with Boobs.

[struggle4progress]

22. Too many places to go with it:

News with boobs. News for boobs. Boob news. New boobs. Nude boobs.

It's confusing.

[NewWaveChick1981]

21. "New! Improved! Vibrating Cock Rings Now at Wal-Mart!"

Always. :P :rofl:

[Richard Steele]

64. "Vibrating Cock Ring- It Does a Body Good"

REEEAAAL good!

[NewWaveChick1981]

70. ...

:spray: :rofl: So I've heard... :P

[NC_Nurse]

23. Preparation H suppositories:

Bend over and take it. }(

[struggle4progress]

40. Hey! We haven't seen you since Kempe's!

Hope all is well! :hi:

[Little Wing]

24. Shimano - Find your inner pedalphile

[Little Wing]

25. Beat your mother every night

with Uncle Ben's Minute Rice

[rug]

26. Join the Army and Lose a Leg.

[Starbucks Anarchist]

27. "Blow Pops -- this thing isn't gonna suck itself."

[spacelady]

28. Using Leeches to be Cool Just as Bad as Smoking Pot!!!!!!!!

Real theme of the newest anti-drug PSA.

[struggle4progress]

29. OK. I'm missin somethin here.

Hey, man! Let's sneak out into the football stadium and put some leeches on our legs during lunch

Ya know, I really don't think any of the delinquents I knew thirty-some years ago would have thought that was a very cool idea

[spacelady]

31. Here is what you may be missing:

Subject: It is about a post I made earlier about a REAL PSA Commercial
Message:
It is about equating leech use to pot use: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vs2IK4IboaQ

[struggle4progress]

38. No, your first post was clear enough. I can't imagine the ad is effective.

Thirty-some years ago, my friends and I would have reacted to such an ad with complete contempt. I don't believe the copy-writers know anything anything at all about the psychology of teen-age substance abuse. That's really what I was trying to say in my prior (and apparently cryptic) reply.

[asthmaticeog]

30. Promise her anything, but give her a hot carl.

[Crabby Appleton]

33. Example: "Jesus saves at First National Bank" and at

today's prices it's a miracle!

[Zhade]

34. Already done by Family Guy, but...

Diamonds: She'd Pretty Much Have To

[HEyHEY]

48. I like Ron White's "Diamonds.. that'll shut her up"

[Zhade]

35. Ol' Maine Fresh Seafood Delivery - Everybody Loves Getting Crabs!

NT!

[struggle4progress]

39. LOL!

[Richard Steele]

36. Offensive and inappropriate? Howbout "Bush '08" ?

[struggle4progress]

41. Hey! Missed you both last night!

:hi:

Of course, we all understand that you folk have busy lives!

[hunter]

42. But someone already has!

Smoke pot, it's better than leeches!

(On edit, I should have hit refresh before I posted, Spacelady!)

DU Thread here:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=6030697&mesg_id=6030697

Youtube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vs2IK4IboaQ

[Danger Mouse]

43. How about 'Jesus is my designated driver'?

It's more of a tshirt slogan than anything else, but isn't it horrid?

[Bucky]

44. "Beer: it's not just for breakfast anymore!" (brought to you by the Beer Council)

[HEyHEY]

45. "Shave your balls with a bic"

[HEyHEY]

46. "Exxon, the secret ingredient is blood"

I suck at this.

[Jagrett1]

47. Bush Condoms...

[hunter]

49. Note from a mean old sex ed teacher:

Put a condom on well before you pull in, or you are still a Dumb Fucker.

[Pierre.Suave]

93. HAHAHAHA

you win.

[meegbear]

50. Crisco ... not just for fisting anymore.

[EnviroBat]

60. you bastard... Keyboard totally ruined now.

[meegbear]

61. BWAH-HAHAHAHAHA!

[EnviroBat]

63. You'd fit right in in our troop...

Rude and crude we are, but we love it.

[Deja Q]

51. "Hooters: You can never have just one!"

:wow:

[Brewman_Jax]

52. Metamucil

for when you're tired of being told you're full of shit. :rofl:

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

53. Visit Kentucky - the only state in the Union named after an anal lubricant!

[Brewman_Jax]

54. Forgot that one

hope the Kentucky folks have a sense of humor :hide:

[originalpckelly]

96. I hear they have good horse races in Kentucky, I guess that explains what's going on back there!

[LynneSin]

55. Everyone Enjoys Munching on Spotted Dick

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

56. Kay Jewelers: Oral Sex or Your Money Back

Face it -- it's the only reason guys buy jewelry

[NewWaveChick1981]

57. Ummmm.... not EVERY guy has to do that...

;) I own a lot of costume jewelry. :evilgrin:

[Jeff In Milwaukee]

66. I think I just had a heart attack

Thanks for livening up Monday Morning!

[NewWaveChick1981]

69. You're welcome!

:evilgrin: Anytime...

[Deep13]

58. Quickie Abortions: No Fetus Can Beat Us.

[EnviroBat]

59. Filthy Sanchez - 100% Columbian Coffee

The aroma lasts for days...

[izzybeans]

62. "We've been in the people business since you were in short pants!

My Great-great-great-great grandfather started this company with one leaky Slave ship and the motto 'People selling People to people."

This skit is a goldmine of innappropriate advert. slogans.

http://www.videosift.com/story.php?id=4032

[elehhhhna]

65. "Support Bush's Iraq Splurge"

[Dukkha]

67. Wal Mart: third rate merchandise from third world sweatshops

or "McDonlads: When appearance is not an issue to you"

[HughBeaumont]

68. Marlboros. Because even your kids know what a damn good smoke tastes like.

[NewWaveChick1981]

71. Yours reminds me of one my mother saw once...

In the late 1970s, she worked at a college in a small town not far from where we lived. At the crossroads in that town, there was a huge billboard that said, "JESUS SAVES". It had a big cross on it. Some smartasses from the college had gone out one night and spray painted "GREEN STAMPS" in big white letters at the bottom of the billboard. As she drove to work the next morning, she saw, "JESUS SAVES GREEN STAMPS". :rofl: She laughed about that for weeks, as did we! :rofl:

Guess you kinda have to remember Green Stamps to appreciate that one...:P

[mikeytherat]

72. Salvation used to be two books of Green Stamps...

but I wanted the inflatable raft instead.

mikey_the_rat

[datasuspect]

73. "Jack's Butcher Shop: No One Beats Our Meat"

[JVS]

74. Kotex, we're jamming!

[slj0101]

75. Grandma Betsy's Biscuit Powder:

I don't come down to where you work and slap the dick out of your mouth.


Thanks to Mr. Show. :P

[Deja Q]

77. Durex Condoms: "Beware of Trojans Bearing Gifts"

:yoiks:

[Pierre.Suave]

94. heres a tip...

trojans are bigger...

[Jokerman]

78. "I trust MY balls to BIKE"

As an endorsement for an athletic supporter.

[Jimbo S]

81. "Legal Abortion Clinic"

"Where you can get a doc and a coat hanger for just ten bucks." A take off from a local laywer TV ad.

The above is not mine, credit goes to Jim Mallin prior to his MST3K fame.

[LanternWaste]

82. For the new, trendy and marketed boy band...

For the new, trendy and marketed boy band...

"So hot, they could cure a lesbian..."

:hide:

O-kay, you *did* say innapropriate and offensive...

[Ms_Dem_Meanor]

84. "Unwanted or accidental pregnancy... try Lifestyles."

[UncleSepp]

87. Just For Men Hair Color. You're gray. Not gay.

[Norwood]

88. Johnsons Rx...

We do drugs!!!

[originalpckelly]

95. Jesus Romerez stars in "Jesus's Second Coming" with "Virgin" Mary Leather.