Baby Shower from Hell! (meth addict father, psycho illiterate mother)

[bleedingheart]

Well...the chances the baby of this couple will end up normal are about .001%

The father, 19..recovering meth addict, came to the shower at one point visibly high...and according to the family his two week career at the gas station ended because he kept calling off...

The mother, is the same age and couldn't even read the cards that people included with the gift...

My family (the father's side)...provided all the food, the hall rental and brought the majority of the gifts.

Not once did this young "lady" come around an introduce herself to the people who came to celebrate her upcoming delivery...and with two other pregnant teenagers at this shower...we couldn't figure out which one was her until we asked someone.

The bright and shining moment came at the end...my family was packing up the coolers and their roasters and telling the rest of us to take chicken home and to take some cake home....WHEN....the the pregnant sweety started to scream..."they're taken the fuckin chicken...and they're taken my fuckin cake..."...and started to swear and holler at the very people who brought her gifts...and her mother encouraged her...

Now this young man comes from a part of our family (he is my 3rd cousin) that we have repeatedly tried to help...and they are not indicative of the rest of us...but just when we thought this part of the family couldn't screw up the gene pool any more...he managed to find the biggest screw-up in the world to go forth and multiply...

[wildhorses]

1. i have been wondering ---

:hug:

really don't know what to say

[bleedingheart]

3. not much you can say....

I just feel so bad for that little baby...if the mother gets that worked up over people taking some cake...how will she handle a screaming infant who is a bit colicky?

[SammyWinstonJack]

12. Not well I would assume. Perhaps they should consider giving that precious baby up for adoption?

:shrug:

[Indy_Dem_Defender]

2. Don't worry after my day today

with my family Your family seems normal, that's all I'll say LOL.

[salin]

4. that is so sad...

that child has no say as to who her/his parents are. Perhaps the weight of parenthood will bring maturity to the parents and give more hope for the child.

[bleedingheart]

5. it is really sad and what is even sadder

is that my cousin did little to help her kids as they were growing up...She wanted to be the "fun mom" not the "do your homework" kind of mom...her eldest is a high school dropout that can't even get into the Army...
The middle one is the meth addict and she has one more kid yet to leave the nest.

Her aunts and even some cousins all tried to help her...and she pushed them away...she thought she knew what she was doing...she didn't want to put the effort into raising her children properly...and the price she pays is watching her son fall deeper into poverty and fathering a child that is going to be used as a tool against both him and his family...

I do not think that these two will grow up, as cold as it sounds...I think that the baby should be adopted out to a family who can care for this child and give it a better life.

[salin]

6. does your cousin

recognize the challenges that her kids are now facing per adulthood? :cry:

Btw - it is great to see you! :hi:

[bleedingheart]

7. actually it is dawning on her...

she shunned the hardwork of parenting...thought it would be easier to be "fun"...but she is seeing the problems that arose from that..

she sat at the shower far away from everyone else at one point and had a look on her face that said it all...I am sure she sees that she will end up having to raise yet another child...because the girl's mother doesn't seem even half as capable...

Good to see you too!

:hi:

[salin]

10. Sometimes when the second generation is raised by the

grandmother - the mistakes from when she was a mother are corrected. However that might be moot, given that she is the paternal grandmother, and the pattern tends to be that the child (if going to a grandparent to be raised) goes to the maternal family first. Prayers sent for that child - and its parents and grandparents.

[lizerdbits]

9. Has anyone mentioned adoption to her?

Seems a bit too late but maybe after a week or 2 with a newborn she will consider it.

[bleedingheart]

11. not sure..

and by the time she figures out that she can't parent, I am sure that Children and Youth Services will be involved

[rug]

8. You have a flair for description.

The hospital will flag the situation and Children and Youth will open the case.

[Generic Brad]

13. So? Did you still bring home the chicken and cake?

I would have after being spoken to like that. (But I have always been a defiant one).

[bleedingheart]

14. Of course we left with cake...

the chicken was too dry for me...

the best part was when one of my cousins who brought the rigatoni was asked by the girls family if they could have some to take home...and she looked at them straight in the eyes and said..."No".

Her daughter said ..."oh come on"...and she said..."if they brought something they would have something to take home"...

[Bunny]

15. You cannot pick your relatives, can you?

I feel sorry for the upcoming baby - what a shame.

[LeftyMom]

16. Whenever I hear stories like this, I thnk of my best friend, who is infertile and wants a baby,

and I am reminded that there is no justice in the world. :(

[pitohui]

17. baby showers are not mandatory

i've been a "no show" for far less good reasons than not wanting to give a hand-out to some crackheads (or methheads as the case may be, it's just around here crack is still a bigger deal), in fact, i won't associate w. crackheads at all this time of century, if they want me to be a part of their scene, they can clean up their act and keep it cleaned up for oh about a decade or so before i'd trust them again

third cousins aren't really relatives anyway and can/should be ignored if they are coming around basically to get the "help," all the "help" in this case is doing is enabling them to continue being active in their addiction

hell, i don't go to baby showers for perfectly nice third cousins, there is no reason for third cousins to be going around hitting up people at such a distant remove for help with their spawn, shower should be for intimate friends/family or it's a scam anyway

[catmandu57]

18. Life is a bitch the way it is

These people have an uphill battle that's only going to get worse. It's like I tell mt wife just because someone is biologically equipped to have children doesn't mean they should, unfortunately the people who realize this don't and those who are too obtuse to realize it continue to populate the world with your and my third cousins.