I'm so tired of dealing with drama!

[Reverend_Smitty]

it's not even my own damn drama, but it's the drama that is going on in other people's lives that they bring to me so I can "advise" them on it. Now I'm not one to beat around the bush and if you piss me off...I'm not going to stew in it, I'm just going to go and tell you about it right away. Sometimes that is dangerous because I will say things that I regret but (I usually cool off and apologize) I find it much healthier than holding a grudge or doing that catty "talk behind his/her back" thing. I left middle school long ago, but it seems to follow me wherever I go.

Example: Tonight I just spent an hour on the phone with a friend who is 3,000 miles away and the people she is sharing a hotel room with were being sort of obnoxious when she was on the phone with a guy she likes and is supposed to drive 2 hours to take them all to a baseball game tomorrow. So instead of saying to her roommates, "stop acting like jackasses this person is going way out of his way to help us tomorrow" which would bring the problem out in the open and hopefully resolve it. She said nothing, was pissy to her roommates and decided not to got out for dinner and drinks with them tonight. So basically instead of trying to resolve a very minor problem right away she's preventing herself from having a good time, probably is going to have a bigger fight tomorrow because of her actions tonight and then wasted an hour of my life telling me about something I have no control over.

I really wish things like this were a rare occurrence, but they seem to happen all the time to me...and the kicker nobody ever takes my advice because I tell them what they need to hear, not what they want to hear

[idgiehkt]

1. that is tough

the thing is sometimes it's better not to let people vent on you because it's a release and they release energy that way instead of dealing with the problem. It's so hard to know what the right thing to do is though. That is why when people go to Al-Anon no matter what they say the problem is they will always be answered with "what are you going to do about it?"

I do know what you mean though...my brother and sister in law are about bankrupting my parents and we talked about it for hours tonight. My parents are at their wits end about it (their water got cut off again today and they had to get buckets of water from my parents). They are draining my parent's finances dry. So my sister-in-law goes over to get the water and starts dogging out my brother like everything is his fault (long story short, he works full-time and she doesn't do shit, 'shit' including housework or any kind of thing someone is totally supported does or should do). My dad is fed up because they let their car insurance lapse and had expired tags on both cars, FOR SIX MONTHS. Then he found out that during that time, she went out and got glass packs put on her mustang. My Dad about blew a gasket over that. No insurance, no tags, but glass packs nonetheless. And then...lol, you get the picture, it's just drama on top of drama on top of drama. Sigh....I am trying to get my parents to demand my brother turn his accounts over to my parents to sort out for him, or cut them off. It's just a mess and there doesn't seem to be a solution. Sorry, I just realized this is exactly the same crap you don't want to hear. Just venting here, myself...I'm pretty freaked out about it too.

Hope your friend gets it straight though, it's hard to tell people you are tired of hearing stuff. Some friends I have are in situations with other people that they can't control, and I will gladly listen to them anytime, because I care about their wellbeing and want to be a shoulder for them, but stuff like with my brother just makes me want to throttle him (or really, his wife, to be precise).

[Reverend_Smitty]

2. wow, your family drama makes mine seem insignificant (which it is)...

I don't mind listening to people's problems and trying to give them advice it's just the irritating insignificant crap that gets on my nerves

[idgiehkt]

6. it's kind of the same I think.

You were being used, my parents are being used. In both cases the primaries don't want to take the appropriate actions to change the situation, they just want to kvetch about it. Sigh. It sucks sometimes...I just don't want to be around my SIL anymore because I know I am going to flip my lid about it because my Dad has heart problems and this is majorly stressing them.

I hope your friend gets it worked out.

[AlCzervik]

7. i'm sorry that situation hasn't improved, i remember we talked about that awhile back.

i'm glad you're there for your brother.

[idgiehkt]

8. Hey

Good to see you. :hi:

No, tonight the shit kind of hit the fan, because my Dad told her she should have been working this whole time, and he said that my brother 'goes out and works his ass off in this heat, and in the cold' (about half of his work is outside) so she should be contributing something. She just made the mistake of waltzing in there and talking about how my brother 'can't handle money'. It burns me up...did find out the interesting tidbit that her grandmother is now making her car payment. I could go on and on about this. And now she is pregnant so there is no end in site to this mess. Sigh. He doesn't talk to me about it at all though, I just hear through back channels. :(

[Neoma]

3. I couldn't read all that.

Too dramatic.

[Reverend_Smitty]

4. lol

it's not really dramatic...just plain stupid! :P

[Neoma]

5. I'll tell you what.

I'll write a book, and it will have alot less drama in it than the regular 'Oh my god, we're going to die' story line.