W issues "working vacation" statement

[underpants]

http://www.whitehouse.org/news/2003/080303.asp

THE PRESIDENT: Good afternoon. It's a crisp 110 degrees in the shade here in the manly badlands of Crawford, where my lovely wife and I arrived yesterday to begin our annual month-long vacation. You know, I can't tell you how happy it makes us to get away from all the posturing and phoniness in Washington DC, and come here, to strike photogenic poses on our made-for-campaigning, down-home ultra-luxury ranch mansion – the Western White House.

That said, I did briefly consider cutting my Crawford time short this year – because, you know, when those Arabiacs spent my 2001 vacation plotting to fly into the World Trade Center, it sure made me look like a slack-ass Bozo when I finally rolled back into Washington. But, then Laura reminded me that I am not just taking a vacation for myself. I'm also vacationing for all our boys in uniform who have been on duty for the past 365 days straight. So, I may take even longer, and will certainly be adding one additional tribute day for each American National Guardsmen who gets mowed down by some Iraqi who's jubilantly embracing the freedom to exercise our Second Amendment.
......
That's why at our new fund-raisers, we're not even sitting people down and serving them plates of greasy chicken thigh anymore. We pack them in like cattle, give everyone a thirty-cent hotdog, and make sure I'm in and out of the room before they start queefing Oscar Meyer vapors.

Now if you'll excuse me, it's almost high noon. That means it's time to go jog a 5K with whichever liberal journalist I think looks most susceptible to heat stroke today.

[cherryperry]

1. ROFLMAO - thx! n/t