Does withholding sex to get your way actually work?

[motely36]

Have you ever done it?

:shrug:

[TZ]

1. IBTL!

This ought to be good while it lasts..:popcorn:

[motely36]

4. Does this count as a sex thread?

I wasn't asking for details. I was just thinking does it really work?

[TZ]

5. hmm maybe its an abstinence thread?

:P

[CrownPrinceBandar]

2. I don't know if it works..........

but its awfully mean, IMHO.

[bigwillq]

3. No. Cause then I lose out!

:evilgrin: :P ;) :)

[supernova]

6. No, it doesn't

But genuine differences in sexual preferences could indicate a larger conflict.

edit: I've never withheld it as a way to consciously manipulate or control an SO, but I have lost faith in the relationship then, as a consequence, withdrew emotionally.

[BeachBaby]

10. +1 to your edit.

:thumbsup:

[motely36]

12. I see your point

I think withdrawing emotionally is a result of problems in the relationship. But I see lots of commercials where one person in the relationship, usually the woman (in the commercials), implies that if they don't get their way, then no sex.

[supernova]

13. Because commercials are

all about portraying maturity and responsibility within relationships!

:silly:

:D

[unpossibles]

7. I don't think it works for me

but then I'm usually not able to hold out for more than a minute or two.

[mcctatas]

8. I'll let ya know in about three weeks

:P

[flvegan]

23. Ha!

:rofl:

[MissMillie]

9. only for people who are putting out to begin with

If you're not sexually active... the whole thing just seems pointless.

[guitar man]

11. If she wanted to cut me off

she's have to find out where I'm getting it first :evilgrin:

:hide:

:yoiks:

[RadiationTherapy]

14. It can't be obvious; it has to be a series of put offs.

But done effectively can mess with a person's emotional balance and make them more susceptible to mistakes that you can blackmail them with later.

It's the blackmail that works, the withholding is just a tool.

[HopeHoops]

15. Of course it doesn't work.

Well, not if you have my "whenever, wherever, and as often as possible" approach to sex.

[The2ndWheel]

16. And if getting my way was to be having sex

Wait...I've made a huge mistake.

[skygazer]

17. No

Behaving like a petulant child is more apt to make your significant other less inclined to have sex with you anyway.

[old mark]

18. Depends. At my age, it wouldn't matter much - besides,

we hardly know each other.....
:eyes:

mark

[La Lioness Priyanka]

19. to edit my answer, no i dont think it works long term as it creates an air of bitterness

and manipulation

i am sure in the short term it does work. (ex: we can have sex only after this apartment no longer looks like a typhoon ran through it)

[Midlodemocrat]

20. I wouldn't think so. And, no.

[Pierre.Suave]

21. NO, I have never done it

I am an adult.

[PRETZEL]

22. In the most general sense, maybe once

that would work if not done in a spiteful, malicioius way. Punishing ones SO in what should be the most intimate of acts known to humans in this way is ultimately the most selfish acts one could do.

As the withholdee, I can write a book on the last year of my marriage.

[Orsino]

24. I have successfully used it to get most of the six billion people on Earth to leave me alone. n/t

[Shell Beau]

25. I think it is a lousy way to get what you want.

Edit: No, I have never used sex to get my way.

[MilesColtrane]

26. It hasn't worked for me with Ann Hathaway yet.

She has a will of iron.