I need to ask for some SERIOUS advice from the Ladies of the Lounge.

[Richard Steele]

As many of you now, I became SINGLE again last August.
My ex-Sweetie and I were together for 9 years and 7 days,
and I thought we'd be together forever.
I was wrong.

Anyway: I'm currently 40 years old, and I haven't been looking
for a "date" in over a decade, so I'm REALLY out of practice...

There's a lady who comes into the store who I *THINK* might be
interested in me...she comes in about 3 times a week, she spends
several hours per visit, and she seldom BUYS anything.
But she ALWAYS engages me in one of those "Hey, how ya doing?" conversations,
and she's been asking about some personal stuff lately.
I don't know anything about her, but I would really like
to get to know her better.

Problem is, she's a CUSTOMER and I'm a MANAGER.
As a manager, I'm not prohibited from "dating" customers,
but I'm prohibited from "hitting on them"....
so I just can't make the first move.


So, if any of you LoungeLadies can offer me advice
on this scenario, I'd be very very grateful.

[MissHoneychurch]

1. Sounds like she is interested in you

lucky woman.

You could try to show her that you are interested as well without hitting on her. Give her hints.

[XemaSab]

2. Some time when she is chatting with you

tell her you're REALLY REALLY busy at that moment but you'll be getting a break/getting off work in 10 minutes and could you maybe continue talking to her over coffee? :shrug:

[Captain Hilts]

7. Yes!

[blogslut]

3. Try this

Pick a place - a coffee shop, a night club, a friggin flea market, whatever - some place you actually like and actually frequent.

Mention the place to her, something like: "Do you ever go to blah blah? Well, I go there sometimes. In fact, I'm going to be there on ______ in the ______ hour. Maybe I'll see you there."

Of course then, you actually have to show up when you said you would or you're a dick.

:)

[Phentex]

4. I find that too vague...

Nobody wants a wishy washy person who may or may not show up. The sometimes and the maybe make it too vague.

I don't see anything wrong with simply asking her to meet for coffee.

[lizziegrace]

5. I agree

Next time you see her, mention that you're going to a specific coffee shop after work and ask if she'd like to have a cup of coffee. I don't see that as hitting on her. And yes, she's interested in you.

[Captain Hilts]

6. Yes, I agree, that's a good approach. nt

[madeline_con]

15. Yes, do that! n/t

[LynneSin]

8. To me "hitting on" implies something that involves unwanted sexual advances

Provided that you're not suggesting hitting a local motel for a quickie, I think what you are doing is fine. Perhaps sometime when she's in your store (and you have a break available) mention that you're grabbing a coffee for your breaktime and ask if she wants to join you.

[Richard Steele]

10. You're right about that. "Hitting on" is such an ugly phrase.

I want to make some "advances", but not crude & juvenile sexual ones,
and certainly not UNWANTED ones.

I'm still at least one step away from actually "asking her out".
I'm looking to find a polite way to ask her if she's SINGLE or not.

[Believing Is Art]

12. If whether or not she's single is what's keeping you

from asking her out, then just ask her out. If she's not single, she'll decline and probably mention a SO. Provided she isn't wearing a ring (for which I assume you've already looked), it's no foul.

[Rosie1223]

9. Ask her if she likes garlic

That would be an interesting ice breaker.

[Richard Steele]

14. That's actually not a bad idea!

Thanks! :thumbsup:

[Evoman]

11. Ask her out for coffee. Fuck the store's policy.

How is the store going to find out anyway? Just do it while no one else is around.

Don't use store policy as an excuse to ask the lovely lady out.

[KansDem]

13. Good luck!!!

After 20 years and two kids, Ms. KansDem and I are calling it quits and I can't imagine "going around a second time."

But, it appears the pursuit of happiness is a lifetime journey...

Best of luck to you! :hi: