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CO Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-26-04 05:26 PM
Original message
With All The Stories About I-95 In The News Today...
...I figured it was time to post the lyrics to "The I-95 Asshole Song". - Wayne

* * * * *

The Asshole Song by Jimmy Buffett (lyrics) by veco

Well I was drivin' down I-95 the other night.
Somebody nearly cut me right off the road.
I decided it wasn't gonna do any good to get mad.
So I wrote a song about him instead.
It goes like this...

Were you born an asshole?
Or did you work at it your whole life?
Either way it worked out fine
'cause you're an asshole tonight.

Yes you're an A S S H O L E...
And don't you try to blame it on me.
You deserve all the credit.
You're an asshole tonight.

You were an asshole yesterday.
You're an asshole tonight.
And I've got a feelin'
you'll be an asshole the rest of your life.

And I was talkin' to your mother
just the other night.
I told her I thought you were an asshole.
She said, "Yes. I think you're right."

And all your friends are assholes
'cause you've known them your whole life.
And somebody told me
you've got an asshole for a wife.

Were you born an asshole?
Or did you work at it your whole life?
Either way it worked out fine
'cause you're an aaaass...hole tonight.

http://www.listology.com/content_show.cfm/content_id.8887
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minkyboodle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-26-04 05:31 PM
Response to Original message
1. very timely CO liberal
I had just gotten off the I-95 interchange this afternoon in Springfield VA and was on an overpass exiting when I saw a fire truck with siren blaring approaching in my rear view. I slowed down and moved to the shoulder to give the truck room to pass on the two lane overpass. Then I saw that some asshole in a sedan was trailing behind the truck going about the same speed. That asshole almost rear ended me going like 55 while I was nearly stopped on the shoulder. The fucker wasn't even going to the same place as the truck, just using the truck to speed along. I wonder if he was born that way.... uggghghhhh I hate NOVA traffice.
Scott
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WannaJumpMyScooter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-26-04 05:43 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. Used to have fun with those assholes in NYC... most of them
were Yellow Cabs... following the Ambulance through traffic.

Once on the FDR drive, on a snowy rainy day we were responding to an accident with injuries in the tunnel under Battery Park. This one cab had been tailgating me all down Water Street.
As we got on the FDR, there was a highway cop directing us to cross the medial and go the wrong way to the accident.
With plenty of space left, I stepped on the emergency brake, which does not engage the brake lights...

B A M !



Scratch one Yellow Cab. Bad.

The highway cop gave the guy 4 summonses too.

One small strike for emergency vehicles.
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Wickerman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-26-04 05:32 PM
Response to Original message
2. That was sweet
touching even - thanks CO!

:thumbsup:
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CO Liberal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-26-04 06:00 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. When I Used to DJ In Bars Back in NJ....
...I got lots of requests for that song. And for "The Rodeo Song".
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Wickerman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-26-04 06:15 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. geeez, all that and big hair, too
sounds like hell.
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