Apparently all you need to do to get published now is insert zombies into existing literature

[Bucky]

"Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" was clever. Now the whole thing's getting tiresome. Last night at Barnes & Noble I saw "Dick and Jane and a Vampire" in the kiddie books (the vampire was entirely harmless, which sort of ruins the whole point of the mash up) and in the teen books a number called "Unicorns vs Zombies" and in the humor books "Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Slayer" and even a zombie version of a 1950s family cook book. Okay, I get it, I get it already!

I'm going to spend my weekend inserting text into a public domain text and make my fortune. Get ready for Bucky's "Acts of the Apostles and Zombies." It will, of course, be intrinsically zany.

Stupid humans.

[Bucky]

1. Acts of the Apostles and Zombies, by Dr. Luke the Evangelist and Bucky

(Pssst, hey kids! See if you can figure out which parts of the story I inserted in this brief excerpt)

Chapter One, Verses 1-5

The former treatise have I made, O Theophilus, of all that Jesus began both to do and teach about killing zombies, until the day in which he was taken up, after that he through the Holy Ghost had given commandments unto the apostles whom he had chosen to go forth and kill zombies:

To whom also he shewed himself alive after his passion by many infallible proofs, being seen of them forty days, and speaking of the things pertaining to the kingdom of God such as killing zombies: And, being assembled together with them, commanded them that they should not depart from Jerusalem, but wait for the promise of the Father, which, saith he, ye have heard of me and all the zombies I hath killed. For John truly baptized with water; but ye shall be baptized with the Holy Ghost not many days hence.

[RandomThoughts]

2. I would not kill zombies, if I have any choice in the matter.

Wouldn't it be better to heal them.


And much of 'zombie lore' is backwards, and the zombies are the good side in many of those films. They mix and match metaphors though, so depends how you see it.


And there are lots of crushing delusions around that topic that I don't post. Basically if you think a zombie is eating your brain, stand up for what you believe, learn, but do not do what you are told because something says it. Know you can claim free will at any time. Although don't let someone say you are a zombie for having learned some concepts you can defend and feel are correct.

Much of the zombie metaphor says ideas of compassion is what a zombie attack is, and thinking without feeling is being alive, that is the backwards part. If you remove all the filters from the movies it is pretty obvious.

Although I think it is best to try not to be mean to them, if they are bad it will help them, if they are good then it would not make sense.

[Call Me Wesley]

3. Did you put this Zombie on my desk?

[siligut]

4. That bastard zombie's entrails look like a corkscrew.

Hey! Bucky, I see a new niche for the zombie market! Maybe you could just manufacture corkscrews and brew zombie wine.

[TrogL]

5. Frankly I think it's an improvement

Much as I'm a fan of fine literature, I believe War and Peace would be improved by a zombie invasion during the banquet scene.

Granted it would take 400 pages instead of 300 for what's-her-name to burst into tears, but at least now she'd have a coherent reason.

[Fire Walk With Me]

6. Zombies have added back the goodness stolen by myriad nonsense vampire franchises.

I have received my wish.

[YellowRubberDuckie]

7. Actually, all you need to do is go to Amazon's Kindle site....

...and you can sell whatever drivel you would like to call literature.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

8. Zombies and vampires are totally out of control in our pop culture

"Buffy" was kind of fun, with its literate, humorous approach, but I have no interest whatsoever in the rest.

Maybe it's a generational thing, but if you tell me that a book or movie is about vampires, I will put it on my list of "things that teenagers will enjoy more than I will." (The list also includes movies with numbers after them and movies that consist mostly of special effects.)

[Lucian]

9. You should watch "The Walking Dead" on AMC.

It's a great zombie show, and it's for adults. It's on Sunday nights at 9 central.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

10. No cable, and I have plenty of zombie-free TV to watch

between my Netflix instant view and my DVDs imported from the UK and Japan. :-)

[Orrex]

15. UK and Japanese DVDs are totally out of control in our pop culture

:evilgrin:

[jobycom]

12. That's why we need ninjas to fight them.

[Orrex]

14. That's basically true of any genre.

How many retellings of the "Cinderella" myth have we endured?

How many romantic comedies about the lonely-n-beautiful woman in love with her best friend?

How many animated films about talking animals seeking to achieve some cute goal?

How many fish-out-of-water comedies have wee seen?

How many films about victims out for revenge?
Or about framed lawmen out for revenge?
Or about sympathetic criminals out for revenge?


If a genre finds a way to run with a concept, it absolutely will do so.


As long as a particularly retelling is done well, then I don't see a problem with it. The problem is when it's done in an uninteresting manner, but it's still a numbers game; you're bound to get more crap than gold.

[jobycom]

11. Seems to work in elections, too. People keep voting for them. nt

[Orrex]

13. The gimmick was worn out before I finished reading the title

Mash-ups like this go way back, and it's just a part of the genre. You could as easily complain about stories with teen/twenty-something vampires. It's a gimmick. It's a hook. It's been done a million times before, and it'll be done a million times hereafter.

Incidentally, it's worth distinguishing Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter from Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, because the former is (I believe) an entirely original work, whereas the latter is a post hoc shoehorning of zombies into an existing novel.


Word of warning: you won't "make your fortune" by doing this. Just saying.