20 million people ages 18 to 34 live at home with their parents

[steven johnson]

The current severe recession has pushed the extended family in the U.S. into a role well appreciated world wide -- an economic safety net.

The recession, loss of jobs and homes, high cost of living and growing debt are forcing adults to turn back to their parents for financial help. These boomerang kids, as sociologists and psychologists call them, are the latest change in the ever-shifting landscape of the American family. Intergenerational households -- parents, their children and sometimes grandparents -- were common in the 19th century. That changed early in the 20th century, when sons and daughters married younger -- sometimes in their teens -- and quickly moved out to create their own households. Then the Great Depression forced families back together. They once again grew apart during various lush economic periods that followed.
According to 2008 Census figures, 20 million people ages 18 to 34 live at home with their parents -- 30 percent of that age group. Researchers for the Network on Transitions to Adulthood, a group financed by the John D. and Catherine T. MacArthur Foundation, found that since the 1970s, the number of twentysomethings living with their parents has increased by 50 percent. Of those who moved out of the house by age 22, 16 percent returned home before they hit 35, the researchers found.

Almost half of June 2008's college graduates had planned to move home after graduation, according to a survey by the employment Web site Monster.com.

David A. Morrison, president and founder of Twentysomething, a consulting firm that researches young adults, said the last time he noticed this phenomenon was during the recession that hit the country around 2001. But the severity of this economic downturn has forced children of all age groups, single or married, back home, he said. The dynamic is different.


Back Home to Roost

[Captain Hilts]

1. Another reason 14 million houses are empty. nt

[paulsby]

2. and 3/4 of them

post on political blogs!

:)

[jody]

3. Interesting, I wonder how many million parents 65+ live at home with their children? n/t

[madrchsod]

9. i`m 62 and we lived with my parents when they were in the 60`s

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

4. 18 million want to borrow the car tonight.

[Hello_Kitty]

5. That started well before the economic crisis.

Starting in the early 90s, American parents lost their fucking minds and coddled their children to the point where a lot of them can't wipe their own butts. If you think I'm kidding read this:

Moms write survival guide for coddled young adults


By Sharon Hill, Canwest News ServiceMarch 27, 2009

WINDSOR, Ont. -A son with scurvy because he thought he could survive on chicken wings and beer got two moms thinking they should write a book.

A guide to adulthood. A how-to book with things as simple as how to boil water and how to wipe your bum, and trickier tasks like tying a Windsor knot and managing your finances.

Kim Zarzour, a Windsor-born journalist, and author Sharon E. McKay packed all their tips into the 514-page book Good To Go: A Practical Guide to Adulthood.

It was one of McKay's sons who got scurvy but Zarzour said her own teenage son's attempts at cooking show the book is needed.

``We'll start easy. Here's a box of chicken nuggets, go for it,'' Zarzour said recalling a classic case of confused cooking. ``And of course he's yelling out: `What's a cookie sheet?' I mean, how did I not remember to teach him what a cookie sheet was?''



http://www.canada.com/health/Moms+write+survival+guide+coddled+young+adults/801230/story.html

I suppose I should give the women credit for finding a way to profit from their failure as parents. :eyes:

[OKNancy]

6. 24 year old - graduated in June of 08

and living at home. She has two part-time jobs and it's so hard for her. Fortunately, we get along great.

[Sarah Ibarruri]

7. This is not a bad thing. Too bad it had to happen with an economic disaster

Families living together and relying on one another is a good thing. I'd like to know who started the idea that families living together and relying on one another is a bad thing.

Another thing that needs to happen is that living areas need to be concentrated. The sprawl needs to end, to make for a safer planet ecologically.

[Hello_Kitty]

11. Sure it's a good thing, if you subscribe to rigid gender roles.

When people romanticize those extended-family situations they conveniently forget that mothers and daughters and aunts and grandmas are expected to unquestioningly provide all the child/elder care and domestic labor for free to keep the whole thing running.

[DonCoquixote]

15. er.

Not always, and not in the modern day. There are women who mow lawns and men who make dinners and change diapers.

[Hello_Kitty]

20. Right, and they're in traditional extended family settings.

Not.

Much as it's trendy to bash everything that's American and Western on this site (and admittedly there's much that deserves to be bashed) not all developments have been negative.

[DonCoquixote]

29. "traditonal"

The fact is, things are changing all around, and some guys do what women used to do, and vice versa. The fact is, this economy does not allow many people to actually make it on their own, so people stick together so they can pay the bills. Get used to seeing a lot of that, because the days when everyone can go out and get a house and a job are dying.

[Hello_Kitty]

33. I understand that but I'll be damned if I let an able-bodied young adult sit on his ass all day

Because it's too haaaaaaard to make it on his own.

[YoungAndOutraged]

37. You sound like this strikes a nerve or something with you

You think all guys over 18 who live with their parents sit on their asses all day? I do all the housework so that my Mom can enjoy her time off of work.

[Hello_Kitty]

39. You're an exception to the rule.

Believe me. And yes, it does strike a nerve. I was supporting myself from the time I was 18. No coddling by my parents.

Edit to add: Exception to the rule on the housework, that is. Didn't see you say you have a job. If you aren't working, housework is the least you can do. I was cleaning the whole house from the time I was 8 years old.

[YoungAndOutraged]

40. For my family this is a matter of survival

You make it sound like I sit around playing video games. LOL, if only I could! My parents fought for the jobs they have and I'm fighting to find a job now. The LAST thing my Mom's going to do is kick me out of the house just because of my age. She's not a sociopath. Why should I have it twice as bad just because I'm male? A family looking out for one another is not a bad thing.

I'm tired of being seen as living trash (and by LIBERALS, no less) because I am not rich enough to afford my own place to live. If anything, this is a class issue. You wouldn't believe what I've had said to my face, from liberals, because of my economic situation. It is disgusting what I've had to go through.

[Hello_Kitty]

43. Rule Number One of the Internets

If a post is not about you, then it's not about you. I'd suggest you do some Googling on young adults living at home and you'll see that there are many who are taking advantage of the situation, as the number of posts from parents who've had it up to here with them will attest. Read the article I posted in my response #5 http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=114x63909#63914 It's unbelievable to me that these women found it necessary to write a book to teach young ADULTS basic life skills. The recent phenomena of many young people being dependent on their parents for everything well into their 20s started long before the current economic crisis. It's not about them living at home. You can live with your parents and still be productive and as self-reliant as possible. In fact, if the adult child is living at home it is imperative that the parents not continue to act as though s/he is still a child. It's not doing them any favors.

Case in point: I recently spent time with a friend of mine and her b/f and his 20 year old son. I was incredulous at the way the boy (I use the term deliberately) had his father doing everything for him. We had to go somewhere and the boy had to have his dad pick out his clothes for him. Turns out the boy does absolutely nothing around the house (the father hires a housekeeper to clean everything including the boy's room!), and doesn't have a job. He apparently worked at a convenience store for 3 weeks and it was "too hard" so he quit. His dad is okay with that because "well, he's very creative and I think he should explore opportunities that utilize his talents better". :eyes: When I asked why he didn't have any chores the response was "oh, he's got ADHD". Bad economy or no, this boy is being set up to fail and remain dependent.

[YoungAndOutraged]

45. Not based on my experience

You think the majority of adults who live with their parents just sit on their ass all day? Not based on my experience. Based on my experience, I'm just a scummy lower-class citizen who is wasting your time.

[Hello_Kitty]

50. And you're also a whiner with a sense of entitlement

Poor, poor widdle Nice Guy^TM. :rofl:

[SoCalDemGrrl]

51. Hello Kitty - you doun't sound like a very nice person.. and you appear

to have a chip on your shoulder like nothing I have ever seen.

Apparently you dont realize that TIMES REALLY HAVE CHANGED and these 20 somethings

are expected to pay rents that are astronomical leaving them with very little to pay for

health insurance, car insurance, food, cell phone, internet bills, $3.00-$4.00 a gallon gasoline, etc.

When we were 20ish we only paid 20-25% of our salaries for rent, we got a raise EVERY year,
gasoline was cheap and you could feed yourself quite well at the supermarket every week and still have money
for some FUN.


I know what I am talking about since my 20 something son just got fired from his job, can no longer afford $1572.00
a month rent in Los Angeles and just moved back in with us.

Thank GOD he doesn't have a mother like you, because I'm sure he'd be down on skid row.

You are a heartless B*****!

[Sarah Ibarruri]

27. I know what you mean, however, women generally do not abandon the kids....

And that is a ball and chain that has major repercussions upon a person's life. I don't necessarily think it's only men that enslave women.

I hate to say it that way, but it is true. As a Jewish sage once said, "Children are the greatest blessing and the greatest curse."

[Hello_Kitty]

31. As the OP attests!

You don't have the kids for 18 years anymore. These days, you get to have them until they're 30!

[Sarah Ibarruri]

32. I know! Can you believe it!? nt

[AtheistCrusader]

41. Um..

If my wife held a career that paid the bills, and I could stay home with the kids, I'd be a happy dude.

Extended families living together is very efficient, from many angles. It's how a lot of the world 'does business', and is quite normal.

[yveski16]

16. Its practical

Its an economic, sociological and practical choice, we take care of each other and the house.
http://www.digitalcameraphotographynews.com

[Laelth]

18. Welcome to DU!

:dem:

-Laelth

[Hello_Kitty]

21. Who's 'we'? Does everyone participate equally? Really?

Or do women and girls do most of the caregiving?

[YoungAndOutraged]

35. What's your problem?

nt

[Sarah Ibarruri]

28. It's a blood-tied commune :) nt

[madrchsod]

8. our 23 yr old daughter still lives with us

she moved out for 6 months and figured it was`t worth it. she pays for about a third of the household bills. our son lives about 60 miles away but may move back to work at a better paying job. he`ll live here for 3-4 days then go back home. his wife will stay until she can find a position in this area.

during the 80`s we moved back to my parents house for a year until i found a decent job.

[pnwmom]

10. The legal age of adulthood was 21, not 18, until the 70's.

The pressure to change it came mostly from the fact that 18 year olds were being drafted.

But I think 18 years old is pretty young to be out on your own, in most cases.

[Hello_Kitty]

12. Guess they should raise it to at least 30 now, judging from many young adults around me.

And even if 18 year olds aren't ready to be out on their own, they can contribute to the household. I see far too many who get waited on hand and foot, while not working. Especially boys.

[YoungAndOutraged]

38. You really hate men don't you?

Since you have so many posts, I'll probably get banned, but oh well.

You have got some SERIOUS issues. And sadly, your opinion will outweight mine here.

[Hello_Kitty]

44. I don't hate anyone

I disapprove of parents coddling their boy-children. BTW, address the person who accused young women of prostituting themselves in this post: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=114&topic_id=63909&mesg_id=63933 lest I am led to conclude that your outrage is selective.

Really, methinks thou dost protest a wee bit much.

[YoungAndOutraged]

46. Double standards, much?

I attacked NO ONE. You attacked ONLY MEN.

[Hello_Kitty]

49. And you agreed with the poster who characterized young women as whores. eom

[SoCalDemGrrl]

52. Young & Outraged - you are 100% correct - Hello Kitty has some kind of

problem and it appears to be lack of empathy for others in difficult situations.

Just thank God she's not your mother!

[bighughdiehl]

13. Yep.

Most of that age group that I know in my area live with either parents or roommates including my sister and I. Long before the recession jobs paying more than $10/hr were pretty hard to come by even if you had a degree in one of the "right" fields. What do people expect? I love "hard work", "bootstrap" speeches by the cons when no one is willing to pay for that "hard work" including tons of time and money invested in higher education, etc.

[Sen. Walter Sobchak]

14. my parents absolutely insisted on it

My parents insisted that I stay at home and save like crazy until I could afford a house of my own and not to flush equity down the toilet on renting and when the market was right they helped with a downpayment. Those extra years at home made all the difference in my financial life.

Although I was "the good son" and even as a teenager got along great with my parents.

[customerserviceguy]

17. And thank goodness my three are not among them!

They're their spouses' problems now!

[naaman fletcher]

19. what a silly statistic..

Why pick 18-34? There is a HUGE difference between an 18 year old and a 34 year old living at home. Hell, most college kids probably "live at home" for the purposes of this survey.

Lets see 18-24, and 24-34. That might tell us something.

[Berry Cool]

22. I bet this survey doesn't include the people in this same age group, mostly female,

who are living with (whether or not married to) and being financially supported by an older partner who essentially plays the role of "extended parent" to them in the sense of keeping them from having to worry about being financially self-sufficient.

You know, "kept" people who live with "meal tickets"--some of whom are old enough to be their parents, but whom they are instead sleeping with in return for support.

Probably no one looks askance at these people and says "Why don't those slackers grow up?," though, because their way of solving the problem of a lack of self-sufficiency is more socially acceptable than living with one's parents, and at least provides them with a veneer of maturity.

Society calls such arrangements "a love relationship between two consenting adults," and regards it as a relationship between equals, even when one is bringing just about everything to the table and the other is bringing nothing or next to nothing.

[Hello_Kitty]

23. If we're going to account for that, then we must account for 'golden sons'

You know, the ones who live at home until they are 30 and beyond, while Mom cooks and cleans and does laundry so they can sit in the basement all day on the computer complainig how women are shallow bitches who don't appreciate Nice Guys^TM like them. It's gotta be at least 75% of Free Republic, and more than a few guys here on DU.

[YoungAndOutraged]

36. Wtf?

nt

[Hello_Kitty]

42. Funny, you accuse me of having a personal issue with this but it seems to be more about you.

What's with the "WTF?" on me and not the post I responded to, which essentially accused young women of being prostitutes? You okay with that?

[YoungAndOutraged]

47. You are asking men to give 150% to a woman's 120%

It doesn't work that way, hon.
You're the type who responds to sexism with more sexism. That won't ever change anything. I'm done with you now.

[Hello_Kitty]

48. Um, I think you're mom is calling from upstairs.

She wants you to get off the computer and take the garbage out. :rofl:

You are a Nice Guy^TM.

[PassingFair]

24. My parents expected us to pay rent or move out when we turned 18....

I moved out when I was 19...

[raccoon]

25. Me too. Or go to college when we turned 18. nt

[Kat45]

26. I know a couple of men in their fifties who moved back in with their parents.

One of them works full time as a cashier in a liquor store and cannot afford his own apartment. Being in his fifties, he also doesn't want to have to live with roommates. He moved back in with his parents around 10 or so years ago, after he'd filed for bankruptcy.

[The2ndWheel]

30. It's all about the price of energy

If energy is expensive, people need other people. If energy is cheap, people need other people less. It works with young adults(or adults) living at home, it works with health care, it works with transportation, etc.

[YoungAndOutraged]

34. That this is an issue really pisses me off

I'm 24 and moving out of my parent's home at this time would be suicide. They're intelligent enought to know this. Besides, they don't even want me to leave until and unless I really want to. Why is this such an issue in America? Even to other liberals, anyone over 18 still living with their parents is considered scum.

[SoCalDemGrrl]

53. Young & Outraged - like I said above just thank God Hello Kitty is not your Mom

cuz she really seems to have a screw loose and a problem with empathy
and compassion for other's misery in these tough economic times.

[Hannah Bell]

54. you're supposed to be ashamed if you don't live in the "approved"

fashion, as an isolated economic monad, buying one of everything only for your own use, to pump up the gnp: the ideal capitalist consumer.

god forbid parents & children should like each other or wish to help each other.