Nine BILLION dollars! Some questions.

[manly]

Hey! Does anyone recall the missing nine BILLION dollars that went astray in Iraq?What the hell happened to it?
How is the investigation progressing? Who is in charge of it, and what are they doing? Or are we just going to shrug our shoulders and forget it? It's only nine BILLION dollars, after all.
I swear that sometimes I just want to scream bloody murder at the chemically inert people we have in government. This isn't just a democratic ploy to upset the fundies. The fundies ought to be just as concerned as the democrats(assuming anyone gives a shit).
Hey Howard, here's an issue you can really scream about!
If, by chance, there's an investigation going on and I have missed it, well, I hang my head in shame. IS THERE?

[BlueJazz]

1. Isn't it amazing how the freepers will go on and on about...

...the "Welfare Queens" and Food Stamp recipients?

They'll complain like hell about the cost of supporting the poor yet are tight-lipped as a turtle when confronted with the Billions of dollars that Repug companies screw the Treasury out of.. Amazing..

[Capn Sunshine]

2. What's with you? Michael Jackson is wearing PAJAMAS for god's sake!!

get with the program!

[AllegroRondo]

3. Steal a dollar, go to jail. Steal a million dollars, you're a hero.

[Al-CIAda]

4. 3.4 TRILLION missing from the Pentagon.

THAT is the mother loade.

We could rebuild every school and half the colleges in America...rebuild our infrastructure across the continent...with MISSING money.

I wonder who stole it.

[JDPriestly]

5. Since the government doesn't seem to know or care,

why don't we make up stories about what happened to it?

Here are some possible (fictional) explanations.

Enemies of democracy headed by Dr. No embezzled the $9 billion to use to build private military installations including nuclear missile launchpads in islands in the South Pacific which Dr. No plans to use to intimidate and rule the world.

Alternative two -- trolls sneaked in one night, stole it and hid it away in some of the ancient ruins of Babylon or in ruins of prehistoric civilizations under the sand of the Iraqi desert. They plant to leave it there until the Americans have left Iraq at which time, they will dig it up and build a large resort area including a Muslim religious theme park, shopping center and multiplex cinema.

Another possibility, the insurgents stole it and are using it to fund their own military operations.

A void must be filled. The inaction in the government gives us the opportunity to explain this mystery in any way we want.

[manly]

7. nine BILLION dollars

Actually, it occurred to me that maybe someone mis-spoke, a favorite Bush hobby, and it was only $9.00 that went missing. Tommy Franks confessed that he spent it on a pizza. Mystery solved.

[satya]

6. That's Rumsfeld's slush fund. Too bad he couldn't spring for troop armor.

http://slate.msn.com/id/2089674/