Fuck you, Bill O'Reilly, I'm declaring war on Groundhog's Day.

[Bucky]

This February 2nd, I'm not gonna wish anybody a Happy Groundhog's Day. That's just a superstitious, outmoded myth and patronizing that malarky clearly violates the separation of rodent and state. Don't give into the bastards! Whenever you see someone three Saturdays from now, wish them a "Happy Discontinuation of the Winter Day." That'll be double-plus-good, citizens!

[jgraz]

1. The problem with that...

is you have to keep doing it over and over and over again.

[Fed_Up_Grammy]

2. Happy Discontinuation of Winter Day?

Say that to all the folks in northern states and you'd get some interesting responses.

[Bucky]

3. We have a secret weapon.... Global Warming!!

Yay!

[theredpen]

4. Even better: I'm declaring war on "day"

"Have a nice day?"

Fuck off! Don't tell me to have ANY KIND OF DAY!

It says in Genesis that "God created ... day" and frankly I think it's about time that SOME PEOPLE stopped shoving this religious crap down our collective throat.

I'm not going to tolerate being wished a "nice day," a "good day," or for fuck's sake not a "great day." I disavow sick days, birthdays, dog days, or Doris Days. Mondays? Nonedays! And fuck Tuesdays, too. Mark my words, next time one of these religious wackos thanks their imaginary "god" that it's "Friday," there's going to be an ass whuppin'.

Tomorrow is fine, but damn if I'll admit it's "only a day away." There is no today, nor yesterday. War on Christmas? War on ALL holiDAYs! "Happy Days" jumped the shark when they gave it a title.

We can keep payday.