Wake up! It's the month of May! Do you know what that means?

[Boojatta]

Many people will remember that it was in the month of May that Mary Jo Buttafuoco was tragically shot (but fortunately survived). Other shooting victims paid the ultimate price.

Although the event was both sad and significant, many people now have better recollection of dilemmas involving the question of whether or not someone dry-cleaned a dress to remove male bodily fluids. Senator Clinton has some familiarity with the state of New York and might recall that a New York State parole board granted parole for Amy Fisher in 1999. As Tiny Tim observed, God bless us everyone.

Now I just know that someone is going to twist my words and squeeze out something that I never said.

[RUMMYisFROSTED]

1. Spring flowers?

:shrug:

[TomInTib]

2. Indy Five Hunnert!

Hail, Yeah!

[panader0]

3. I can't twist your words because I don't have any idea what your point is.

But yes, God bless us one and all.

[Boojatta]

4. What about Scrooge and Amy Fisher? Do you bless them?

[panader0]

5. Oh yes

They're not GOP are they?

[Boojatta]

6. Some people think that the media focused too much on Joey and Amy.

What about Mary Jo Buttafuoco? Suppose Mary Jo Buttafuoco had been working in a senior management role at a University in Cincinnati. In that case, would the media have paid more attention to her and not pretended that she was "just somebody's wife"?

[JVS]

7. Are you saying that Monica Lewinsky is going to wound HRC with gunfire in the next week?

Maybe we should interview Joey Buttafuoco for more information.

[Boojatta]

8. Well, Monica might have heard Rev. Wright on TV.

Do we have phone records proving that she never phoned him? What if she used a pay-phone in a shopping mall to call him? Nobody knows what plans those two might have hatched.

[JVS]

9. Monica, rev. Wright? Is Monica a secret muslim now?

[Boojatta]

10. Dresses don't shoot people. That's all that I can say.

It's a good thing, too. I imagine that Monica might have several dresses.

[JVS]

12. Do people shoot dresses though?

[Boojatta]

13. For all I know, dresses never get shot.

However, there are probably a few dresses with bullet holes in them. To put this in perspective, we should probably dig up some official statistics that compare the number of dresses that have bullet holes and the number of pant suits that have bullet holes.

[sandnsea]

11. If my husband said that to me

while he was standing next to his crazy-ass girlfriend

what would you tell me I ought to think?

[Boojatta]

14. If your husband did that...

... then he would need to ask if he hurt the feelings of Mary Jo Buttafuoco and he would owe her and her entire family a respectful apology.

[kenny blankenship]

15. In the Spring a young man's fancy lightly turns to thoughts of Buttafuoco

[Boojatta]

16. That explains why, during the month of May, one might experience dismay.