The Kerry ZINGER that wins the debate!

[sampsonblk]

"If I DID change positions on Iraq, at least I would be right half of the time, unlike my opponent who's a little on the frightening side of every issue and has stated firmly his intention of staying there till the bitter end."

OR

"My opponent is like a quarterback who gets sacked for a loss, gets up and spikes the ball, expecting us to believe that it was a touchdown."

[Guaranteed]

1. That second one is GOOD. nt

[Jane Austin]

7. Yes, that's fabulous!

n/t

[Lancer]

2. I still like what Maureen Dowd said the other day. . .

that Bush being given the authority to go to war as a last resort, knowing he was gonna do it anyway, was like "the guy who reserves the hotel room, then asks you to the prom."

[simpsonsbuff]

4. i like it

The best I could come up with: Mr.President you have been more dishonest about the iraq war, than Pete Rose has been about his gambling addiction.

[Francine Frensky]

20. But a MAN can't say that, although he COULD say (even better):

"It's like the boy who reserves the hotel room, then asks YOUR DAUGHTER to go to the prom."

Then both genders, and especially parents, get it, and are even more people are offended (I mean, lets be serious, maybe MoDo is a prude, but there is a certain type of girl who would see a boy who reserves a hotel room as "resource-ful" -- think bush twins).

[sampsonblk]

21. Good one for Maureen

I hadn't heard that one!

[barackmyworld]

3. maybe I don't know enough football..

but I don't get the second one

[iamjoy]

13. Football Analogy....

I'm no expert myself, but I do watch the game, so maybe I can explain it...

"My opponent is like a quarterback who gets sacked for a loss, gets up and spikes the ball, expecting us to believe that it was a touchdown."


Sacked means the quarterback gets tackled behind the line of scrimmage (line of scrimmage is where the players on opposite teams line up facing each other at the start of each play). Generally "sacked" refers to the quarterback being brought down before having a chance to throw the ball to one of his team members. It means his team now has that much furhter to go to score (a touchdown). It is not a cause for celebration.

Baseball analogy - he sent a fly ball into the mitt of the right outfielder and acted like he hit a homerun (?)

Make sense?

[richmwill]

5. "I have been accused of being a flip-flopper...

...on several issues by my opponent. However, I believe the more dangerous flip-flop is when a Commander-In-Chief charges that a country has Weapons of Mass Destruction, brings his country into war with that country, costs over 1,000 good American men and women their lives, then flip-flops when those weapons turn out to not exist"

Now THAT would be good, I think.

[JohnOneillsMemory]

6. "Re-electing W is like re-hiring Ken Lay just because Enron is tanking."

[iamjoy]

8. Second One

Kerry is fighting hard enough to explain how he didn't "flip flop" on Iraq (you know how Rove's machine twists his words)

[Jane Austin]

9. I heard a good one.

Congress voted to authorize giving the car keys to Bush, but it didn't make him go drive off a cliff (or something like that.)

[cardlaw]

11. Best one I heard was

"Mr. President, I voted to give you the loaded gun, not to shoot us in the foot with it."

[iamjoy]

15. Bush = Toonces

:P

[Jane Austin]

27. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

N/t

[Danocrat]

10. How about this

"Mr. President, you said the Iraqis would throw flowers at our feet. When were they going to do that--right before they beheaded us?"

[olddem43]

12. I think of Bush as one of the two idiots in the movie

Planes, Trains and Automobiles (Steve Martin & John Candy) when they were on the freeway going the wrong way. People kept yelling at them that they were going the wrong way. After a few times, they just looked at each other and asked "how do they know which way we're going?" This, just before they saw two semis coming at them head on. That was the funniest movie scene that I ever saw. Now, just substitute Bush & Cheney for Martin & Candy.

[Senator Lamb]

14. simple

Mr. President can you tell me exactly how many of our boys died in Iraq?


i bet shrub wont know the answer.


ps. 1st time poster, long time viewer.

[cidliz2004]

19. Welcome "Simple"

I bet you are right!

[sampsonblk]

22. Welcome to DU!

Glad to have you on board

[newyawker99]

31. Hi Senator Lamb!!

Welcome to DU!! :toast:

[TexasSissy]

16. The first one-Kerry didn't change positions. The 2nd-I don't know what

that means. Not everyone is into sports.

[iamjoy]

17. See Post #13

No football expert, but I tried to explain it.

[TexasSissy]

29. The pt. is that, if it has to be explained, it's a good example.

My goal is not to understand football (if I had an interest in understanding the intracies of football and all its terminology, I would've done that before this stage of my life). The goal is to use terminology and examples understood by the public at large. I think sports buffs forget sometimes that a lot of the world doesn't follow sports.

[Sparkly]

18. On the tough-guy thing

Posted elsewhere, so forgive the repetition:

"We see horrors in the news -- Americans being captured and beheaded, and Kenneth Bigley begging for his life -- and some say 'This is why we need George W. Bush in office.' I say 'This is because we have George W. Bush in office. This is why he needs to go.'"

[MisterGamut]

23. First one admits flip-flopping

Here is my edit.

Kerry explains how his position was consistent and then slams Bush for also being consistent.

"When I voted to authorize force it was on the president's promise that he would use the authority as leverage. I said then that I would be the first to criticize him if he failed to live up to that promise, and I have been true to my word. Unlike my opponent who's a little on the frightening side of every issue and has stated firmly his intention of staying there till the bitter end. Although, had he switched to my position even once, he would at least have had the virtue of being right 50% of the time."

[kodi]

24. "Really? Well just what war did George Bush serve in?"

show to the entire world that gutless mother fucker as the coward he is.

[oddtext]

25. FINAL WORDS

of the entire debate . . . "on that note, god bless America, thank you for watching. remember America, it's simple, (turning to bush) . . . MISSION ACCOMPLISHED."

[iwantmycountryback]

26. That was a GREAT football analogy

I really hope Kerry has something great. I saw this one on DU a couple days ago if Bush talks about Kerry flip flopping "This man has flip-flopped many times himself, but really he's just a flop."

[iwillalwayswonderwhy]

28. Bush has been holding the map

and directing the driver for four years. Because of the mess his directions have taken us, we can't just make a u-turn. What we can do is take a side turn and find a better route.

[Clinton Crusader]

30. LOVE the 2nd one!

:bounce:
:kick: