Help! Let's Say You Had This (Undiagnosed) ADD Friend ...

[NashVegas]

Who had a habit of making plans with you, but often bailed due to other stuff they forgot about while they were making said plans.

Let's say said friend did something like that on your birthday, you got pissed and flounced out of the room, which made them feel miserable for being a jerk, and later you smoothed things over.

Let's say said friend invited (two weeks later) you to attend a third friend's birthday with them, and asked you for advice on what type of gift they should pick up. And before stopping to think, you, playfully, said "Hey, wait a minute ..." and they felt like a jerk all over again which really wasn't your intention (although it was awfully insensitive of them to ask in the first place).

Please advise ...

[Pharaoh]

1. I'd say

you have some serious mis communicating going on.

Perhaps you need new friends or something?

Not a whole lot of advice can be given with the info you provided,:hippie:

[mopinko]

2. if your friend is undiagnosed, how do you know it is add?

maybe it is bi-polar disorder, or something else, even.
my advice is that you have a choice to stick with this friend, "disorder" and all, and understand what that means, or cut off the friendship. that doesn't mean that you have to just put up with whatever rolls around. but it does mean that you should be prepared to talk about the stuff that goes wrong, like a grownup, and maybe be prepared to do reminders and such if you really want her to be a part of things like your birthday.
even people who have all 52 cards in their deck still f'up and hurt people. we all need to be accepted for who we are, and we all have warts. we all know that our warts sometimes cause pain for those around us. we just need to keep on trucking, but talk it out when things go wrong.
does that help?