Colbert: "God wrote (the Bible) in English for a reason..."

[kpete]

“God wrote (the Bible) in English for a reason: So it could be taught in our public schools.”

Colbert Tells College Graduates: Get Your Own TV Show
By E&P Staff
Published: June 04, 2006 10:30 AM ET

Colbert had opened his speech with: "My name is Stephen Colbert, but I play a person on TV named Stephen Colbert ... who says things with a straight face that he doesn't mean."

In that vein, Colbert considered the immigration debate: “It’s time for illegal immigrants to go — right after they finish (building) those walls." People keep saying immigrants built America, “but here's the thing, it's built now." His suggestions for securing the U.S.-Mexico border went beyond walls to include moats, fiery moats and fiery moats with fire-proof crocodiles.

He added that the border with Canada also has to be secure so Canadians cannot bring their "skunky beer" into the country. He backed English as the official language of the United States — “God wrote (the Bible) in English for a reason: So it could be taught in our public schools.”

Noting the college was founded by abolitionists, Colbert came out against slavery. “I just hope the mainstream media gives me credit for the stand I’ve taken today,” he said.

more at:
http://www.editorandpublisher.com/eandp/news/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1002613019

[Minnesota_Lib]

1. Colbert is so funny...thanks for posting this.

[biscotti]

2. Stephen Colbert is absolutely a genius

at throwing their silly crap back at them. Pointing out the absurdity of it all.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

3. Sadly, Colbert's remark about the Bible is believed by some

My husband and I lead the Dances of Universal Peace, a form of moving meditation honoring all the world's spiritual traditions. One evening a fundy came to the meeting. She sat out the "Allah" dances, which we expected; but when we danced the opening line of the Lord's prayer, she wouldn't do it. Nothing to do with dancing it-it was spoken in Aramaic. According to her (in a voice filled with fear)the Bible was written in English, not some foreign language.

Funny thing was, she did the dances invoking peace on earth and a Krishna dance. Go figure.

[pecwae]

25. Your post

reminds me of a Baptist woman who told me in all seriousness that if the KJV of the Bible was good enough for Jesus, it was good enough for her.

[TWiley]

4. Cobert is an absolute genius

I love the way he pretends to be a republi-tard, and then plays thier stupidity to the hilt. Odly, more than one conservative guest truly believes he is being sincere as he rants their stupidities.

This is the funniest part.

[neoblues]

8. Yeah, they think he's being serious

since he's saying what they believe. Sad that they can't see how insanely funny and absurd their beliefs really are--or would be if their ilk weren't actually running things these days.

[Semblance]

5. Here is the text of the whole speech

http://www.knox.edu/x12547.xml

Enjoy. :)

[W_HAMILTON]

6. Too bad there's no video

Sounds pretty funny.

""Now I know you’re all going to say, “Stephen, Stephen, immigrants built America.” Yes, and here’s the thing—it’s built now. ""

That's a great line! Isn't he coming back next week? I hope so, two weeks is waaaaaaaay too long to go without him and Stewart.

[Preening Fop]

10. Thank You for the text link.....!!

A good example of
the D.U. Community,
sharing enjoyable and useful knowledge.

[rocktivity]

20. PREENING FOP???

Well, welcome to DU--I suppose!

:rofl:
rocknation

[lyonn]

12. Thanks, he didn't disappoint. Laughed out-loud.

Did like his mention of the Book (it was a movie too) "The Name of the Rose". Another subtle point that he is known for, laughter is sinful so says the book.

[jazzjunkysue]

13. Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Beca

Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything." -S. Colbert

Truer words were never spoken.

[Jazz2006]

21. Excellent! Thanks for the link.

:hi:


Great speech.

[Tin Man]

23. Thank you for the link to the transcript - and welcome to DU!

Colbert humor... it's mmm-mmm good!

[Theres-a]

26. Thanks!

[northzax]

7. my favourite line...

You know, all of us alumni, we remember Seymour Hall, playing those drinking games. We played a game called Lincoln-Douglas. Great game. What you do, is act out the Lincoln-Douglas debate and any time one of the guys mentions the Dred Scott decision you have to chug a beer. Well, technically 3/5 of a beer. You DO have a good education!

I wasn’t sure if anybody was going to get that joke.

I soon learned that a frat house—oops—divided against itself cannot stand.

[lyonn]

9. Oh hell, Tooo funny

When can we see the whole thing?

[Lisa]

15. I hope he puts a clip on his show! (n/t)

[Captain Hilts]

11. "Ma" Fergusen of TX said "If English was good enough for Jesus Christ...

it's good enough for you" to a Spanish kid back in the 30s.

At least, Ann Richards tells that story a lot.

[upi402]

14. LOL, bold move -wonder if O'Liarly will follow suit...

:popcorn:

[LibertyorDeath]

16. I'll Rec it just for that one line.

needs one more for the greatest.

[Jeffersons Ghost]

17. OMG LOL... too funny K&R!

[KeepItReal]

18. "When I think about the Truth...I touch myself" - Stephen Colbert

Ya gotta luv it!!

[stanwyck]

19. Remember that one lone Japanese soldier

who got left behind in the South Pacific and kept his vigil against the enemy years after WWII had ended? I think there are still some freepers out there still hanging on Colbert's every word. When he first got his show, many of the freeps over at Free Republic were ecstatic. 'He's one of us! Finally, somebody to counter Jon Stewart I agree with everything he says!" And one lonely poster kept pitifully posting "He's mocking us! He's mocking us!" And it fell on deaf ears.
Poor, little freepers.
Yet, you know they're still out there.
The ones who think he's on their side.

[dalaigh lllama]

24. and don't forget the Delay Defense site

They still have the video posted there with the clip from the Colbert Report where Colbert is "defending" Delay's innocence.:rofl:

BUT...

I just went there and someone must have clued Delay into the fact that the whole left blogosphere was laughing at them for having the Colbert clip on there. He must have thought long and hard -- couldn't take it off, or folks would know we knew he knew (d'ya follow?); couldn't leave it on, cuz it was Colbert actually making fun of him. Well, he solved it by leaving the clip on, but golly gee whillikers, it just doesn't "load" anymore.:rofl:

http://www.defenddelay.com/site/c.fuIWLhMTJrE/b.1084881/k.BE08/Home.htm

[young_at_heart]

22. Stephen, you have given thinking people hope again

Thank you so much!

[wryter2000]

27. Funny!

And they gave him a "Veritasiness Tour" T-shirt. Obama was funny, too.

[JPZenger]

28. Was a Crime to Translate the Bible into German

Martin Luther was nearly sentenced to death by the Catholic Hiearchy in the 1500s. One of his crimes was that he dared to translate the Bible from Latin into German, so that the local people could understand it. This was heresy because the people were not supposed to read the Bible themselves - they were supposed to rely upon interpretations provided to them by priests.

[Kurovski]

29. Kick(nt)