So...let me get this straight.

[WilliamPitt]

Foley gets a call from ABC reporters, who ask for comment on some emails he'd sent to underage male pages.

Within two hours, he quits. He was gone so fast he left a spot shadow on the wall.

Then the IMs come out.

Then Foley blames the demon rum.

Then he checks into a clinic.

Then he makes his lawyer tell the world that he is gay.

And an alcoholic.

And was abused by a priest.

...and this all came about because of a prank, according to Drudge.

This was obviously not just a prank, but a prank of such sweeping Machiavellian depth that it caused all this to unfold.

All concocted by teenagers.

Riiiiiiight.

Well, they do say the Congressional Page application process is competitive.

Someone get these kids a job at the Pentagon.

They'll find those Iraqi WMD in no time.

Or something.

Let me introduce you to my "Bullshit Siren."

[OKNancy]

1. LOL

:rofl:

[longship]

2. I love the sound of the bullshit siren.

Keep it up Will.

[Warren DeMontague]

3. Drudge is a pindicked asscarrot who smells like Lucianne Goldberg's hamper

and if this weren't polite company, I'd tell you what I really think of the guy.

[MADem]

6. No, he smells like rotten raw eggs, if you believe David Brock's book! NT

[JackBeck]

7. OMG.

You can mail me what you really think. So far, so good!

[jimshoes]

9. Eeeewwwwwww!!!!!!11111

I'm series111!!!

[PurpleChez]

59. Excellent pic of Rance Mohannitz!

or however you spell his last name. Of course, he is known by many names, including Opal the Hot Little Bitch

[jimshoes]

64. Thank You

Muhammitz. Although Jimmy Carl Black pronounces it Mohannitz in one scene. :toast:

[PurpleChez]

66. And he was PROFESSIONAL, dammit!

[redqueen]

81. Is that from 200 Motels?

Wow... haven't seen that in forever...

[jimshoes]

85. Yes, and you're invited to join

us in some immaginary beer and some other vile foamy liquids. :beer:

[redqueen]

86. Mmmmmm... vile, foamy liquids...

Thanks!

:beer:

[blondeatlast]

31. You owe me a keyboard or...

another rant as hysterical as that one.

:rofl::rofl::rofl:

[Habibi]

65. Asscarrot. Damn.

That is a fabulous word.

[Warren DeMontague]

68. I can't take credit for it, much as I might like to.

Someone threw it out last week, and I was astounded by its beauty and simplicity.

Oh well, what do they say? "Bad artists copy. Great Artists steal"

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

78. Well, whoever termed it deserves kudos. I'm a fan of "asshat" myself.

It's simple and versatile.

"Hasert is a giant asshat."

"GD was filled with a bunch of asshattery over the 2004 primaries."

The possibilities are endless.

[Warren DeMontague]

87. Yeah. Asshat has had a good run, I'm a little burned out on it.

Like "Assclown" before it.

[Catherine Vincent]

4. One thing about Drudge...

He gives his audience false orgasmic hope.

[civildisoBDence]

90. Drudge and orgasm shouldn't be mentioned in the same sentence

Neither should Bush and brain, or Cheney and heart, or Republican and Congress.

Newsprism

[gademocrat7]

5. I hear it loud and clear!

[DemoTex]

8. My B/S meter is pegged out, too.

[Cleita]

10. Yep, the pundits are spinning so fast that the hole they are drilling

will get them to China in no time.

[VelmaD]

11. And he'd'a got away with it too...

if it hadn't been for those darn kids.

Sorry. Somebody had to do it. :)

[Warren DeMontague]

13. It's those darn *meddling* kids!

But nice one, anyway, Velma.

[Redstone]

12. No, it's all MY fault. I confessed here:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=364&topic_id=2324442&mesg_id=2324485

Redstone

[Rex]

14. Ohhhh...five sirens, must mean we are at Watchband Orange

on the Terror Color Coated Alert System for Imbeciles or the TCCASI as Bush would try and say without spitting his vodka all over the front row of the United Press Corp for Equality and Liberty or the UPCEL.

I like it!

[Poll_Blind]

15. Kicked and Recommended! n/t

PB

[grizmaster]

16. yeah, you know Foley resigned over "phony" IMs

I haven't smelled desperation this thick since I tried to get in my prom date's panties


And believe me, THAT'S a ways back.

[valerief]

17. Methinks the lady doth protest too much. The lady, of course,

being Drudge the Sludge.

:kick:

[eggbeater]

18. Just wait, the best is to come

His next logical move to avoid the checkmate would be to try to convince the public that he was really working undercover to see if these pages would confess to him the names of any democrats that they did the deed with.

Its all very clear to me.. or maybe its the morphine.

either way, its getting too funny to even keep up with anymore.

He just may be the political bomb that the repubs were trying to avoid.

[hootinholler]

19. Um

Isn't it typical for a siren to make noise?

Just sayin

-Hoot

[Rex]

21. They got waterboarded as a 'frat prank', still drying out.

nt

[Burried News]

20. Who left the scene faster, Foley Crapo Gannon or Porter Goss?

Not to mention the dudes at Cunningham's parties or the Limo drivers.

[Canuckistanian]

47. Faster than a Ken Lay autopsy, so they say

Sounds like Foley was keeping a bag packed, "just in case".

[robertpaulsen]

22. Will, thanks for making everyone in my office do this:

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:
:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

[Jacobin]

23. Drudge is an ass hat

But thank you for putting Drudge's silly shit in context

[5X]

24. You forgot the part about it being the Dems fault. n/t

[connecticut yankee]

69. No

it's Clinton's fault.

[MoonRiver]

25. ROLF!

Help! I can't stop laughing! :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

[peacetalksforall]

26. Put the pages in charge of finding bin Laden - if R's are correct

that they trapped Foley! Did the pages trap Clinton or Condit? Why accuse them of only one entrapment? The juvenile logic of Republican Congresspeople is inhuman.

[Patsy Stone]

27. That's correct.

Here was my list of his excuses -- on only the second day: http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=364&topic_id=2303477&mesg_id=2303477

[tex-wyo-dem]

28. Gads...The GOP spin machines are gettin' all

out of wack...they've lost control and created a monster :evilgrin:

[TechBear_Seattle]

29. You omitted two very important facts

They were DEMOCRATIC pages, sent there to pervert Foley to the homosexual lifestyle. And they were sent there under a program implemented by Bill Clinton.

[Cha]

57. ANd foley's a dem and by

gummers..turns out denny bastert is a dem, too.

[Generic Other]

30. What??? Foley is now a victim of the pages' warped sense of humor???

Sheesh, I go to work and the world revolves 10 times faster than normal, up is down, I have an outie not an innie, the sky falls, the moon bleeds, and Repubs poop on my car!

What else have I missed? Did we win the war on terror during my lunch break?

[spanone]

32. Hastert says he won't resign because it would give the democrats

what they want, and no one questions his political motives?

The playing field is rigged.

[in_cog_ni_to]

33. Don't forget Hastert's claim...the Democrats, Bill Clinton and

George Soros did this.:eyes:

[patcox2]

34. It most certainly could have been a prank, but it doesn't matter.

The page may have been pranking, but Foley was serious. Get it? There is nothing unlikely about this. Suppose you were a 17 year old kid and you knew there was this one creepy guy, say it happened in high school, a creepy teacher started sending creepy, suggestive emails. I don't think it beggars the imagination at all that a kid in that situation might try to lead him on, to see exactly where he is heading. The kid might also invite his buddies over, and say watch this, old Foley the perv is coming on to me.

So it might have been a prank to the kid, but to Foley, who doesn't know his messages are being read by a bunch of laughing kids, its still serious.

This kind of thing happens every day.

And besides, thats just one of the kids.

[blondeatlast]

35. those damn teenagers were properly corrupted by those awful Internets,

you know.

DrudgeI'd invite you to do something unpleasant to yourself, but I don't even want to think about you giving yourself that much pleasure.

[salinen]

36. Must I splain everything?

Foley was hired by the "abstinence only" crowd to infiltrate the seedy world of congressional pages. Distasteful as it is, Mark was up to the task. Years of priest abuse made Mark uniquely qualified.

So Foley should be credited with "cracking the ring" and exposing those teens for what they really are. In the next few days Hannity will show without doubt, that Clinton was the leader of "teenpagegate"

I should be a P.I.

[WilliamPitt]

37. ...and when he showed up shitfaced at the page dorm,

he was actually there to make a citizen's arrest.

[salinen]

39. good work junior cadet!

with your skills and my experience, we're about to "crack this one wide open"

[blondeatlast]

38. I'd copyright that scenario-fast-if I were you, or we're bound to see it

pop up on the Scarannity Factor tomorrow.

I've bookmarked this page just in case.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

42. Must I splain everything?

Look... I thought the cop was an underage prostitute! Sheesh.

[dogday]

40. They are all being advised by The Lying Man from SNL

say whatever, tell whatever lies you have to, just don't take responsiblity....

[tblue37]

46. Tommy Finnagin, I think. (sp?)

[Kurovski]

96. "Tommy Flanagan". God bless Jon Lovitz.

:hi:

[wryter2000]

41. That's really funny

What'll they try next? Aliens implanted a chip into Foley's brain to make him lust after young men? Democrats poisoned his lunch in the House cafeteria?

[Kurovski]

97. Not enough Salt Peter.

Maybe they could try that defense when all else fails.

[Shakespeare]

43. Because Drudge is not a legitimate journalist....

....he is incapable of recognizing when a legitimate investigative journalist (finally) does his job correctly.

[Buzz Clik]

50. IF he were employed by a newspaper or television network, he'd be fired

instantly.

[Oilwellian]

44. Those little beasts!

Seriously, a rightwing gay man downplaying the behavior of a child predator gives me the willies.

[WinstonSmith4740]

45. Old joke on Capitol Hill...

I've got a great (gay) friend who was a page on Capitol Hill back in the early 80's. Many years back we were having a conversation regarding the flat out hypocrisy of most of the hard core right wingers in Washington. I had told him that my grandfather, who worked in the Senate dining room back in the 20's had always maintained they (our elected reps in general) "were nothing but a bunch of liars, deviates, and thieves." My friend kind of smiled, and said that obviously nothing much had changed in 60 years, because the standing joke when he was there was, "Don't ever use staples to hold reports together...the reps liked their pages bent over."

I swear it's a true story.:patriot:

[YellowRubberDuckie]

48. LOL.

Will Pitt, you rock. :evilgrin:
I was thinking the EXACT same thing.
Duckie

[Buzz Clik]

49. Great job, Pitt. Why does anyone still bother with reading Drudge?

He's wrong more than he's right. Does he ever put forward a retraction?

[Rockstone]

60. I read drudge and raw equally

I like to see what both sides are saying.

Drudge is about selling sweet lies to conservatives.

He tells them things they need to hear to keep the faith in their idiology. It doesn't matter that they are not true, kool aid cons are all about belief rather than knowledge. They just need something emotionally satisfying ao they can keep the dream going.

[pinto]

51. Foley cited every stereotype and avoided one pertinent detail. He did it.

No one else. I don't care if the guy was raised by a pack of pumas after being abandoned by his family as a swaddling...he surely had the wherewithal to get elected and re-elected. You'd think he'd have the wherewithal to not troll young pages. It's BS.

[katty]

52. Great! Indeed, they could! Draggin' Foley outta his crackhouse

[trof]

53. Your logic, sir, is unassailable.

Yeppers.
Makes perfect sense to me.
Hastert: "The buck stops...OVER THERE!"
The Dems did it.
And Bill Clinton.
And Hillary.
And the ACLU.
:-(

[mcking]

55. and don't forget George Soros! (nt)

[2008]

54. OMG that's beautiful

You need to be writing for Olbermann*. I'd love to hear him repeat this post on his show.

*I mean that as the highest compliment I can give. Olbermann is our Murrow, IMO.

[meuniermr]

56. Not Mine...

[JPZenger]

58. Quickly Taken to Undisclosed Location Where Can't be Questioned

It was something how Foley was instantly stuffed in a duffle bag and taken off to an undisclosed location where no one can ask him any questions. Yes, he will be available to interviews - right after election day.

The coverup is ALWAYS worse than the original incident. If the GOP leadership had acted last year, they could have encouraged him to quietly decide not to run for re-election, and they would have a replacement candidate be a shoo-in for his seat. But they were too addicted to the hundreds of thousands of dollars of campaign money that Foley handed out like candy to other Republicans.

[malaise]

61. Great post

Love the sirens.

[Coexist]

62. Codename: Kids Next Door

[illinoisprogressive]

63. No. It was a scheme by George Sorros and Bill Clinton.

You should know by now. Everything that goes wrong for the gop is Clinton's fault.

[astonamous]

67. Not all of Clinton...just his dick. n/t

[nadinbrzezinski]

70. I can hear the sound

BBNUUUUUUULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!

[ComerPerro]

71. ahh, ya damn teenagers. Always runnin on my lawn.

[OnyxCollie]

72. (In a booming, authoritative voice backed by a timpani soundtrack.)

"Why do you question the slapped-together, highly illogical, completely contrived, pathetic attempt to reproduce reality dumped before you?"

(Hey guys, did somebody forget to give him the shot? 'Cause he's not buying the story. Did he get the shot? Guys?)

[Zorra]

73. Not a prank. It's Clinton's fault.

Somehow.

[rpannier]

74. They've about used up all their excuses and lame answers. I'm expecting

them to say:

It was Colonel Mustard in the Conservatory with the Candlestick.

[WilliamPitt]

75. .

[Bucky]

76. My theory: Drudge is jealous he hasn't made the Top Ten list in a while

This is clearly Drudge's bid to get back on the Top Ten Idiots list.

[EFerrari]

77. These guys are HILARIOUS.

:rofl:

[Name removed]

79. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[WilliamPitt]

80. .

[El Fuego]

82. Clinton made him do it.

[tavalon]

84. Oh, yes, that uberpowerful clenis of destruction n/t

[hsher]

89. Clenis

Thanks a lot, I just blew Coca-Cola all over my keyboard!

[tavalon]

91. Then, grasshopper, I will give you my secret to saving my keyboard

I don't drink liquids at the computer while reading DU - there are just too many witty, intelligent people on here. I would have destroyed ten keyboards if I didn't institute that rule way back when........ :)

[hsher]

95. Thanks, I'm going to need it!

www.yourmorningleibowitz.blogspot.com
Yer Daily Show comic strip

[redqueen]

83. What'd Olbermann call him & Billo the other day?

Pinheads, idiots, and imbeciles?

Yeah, that about sums it up.

I guess that means their audience is even worse... geezaloo.

[bridgit]

88. oh sure, i'll vote this Greatest Page, i can't be seen without my cool on

:spray:

[cherokeeprogressive]

92. WRP! No one searches out your posts any more than I do... BUT

Your "Bullshit Siren" will get NO rest whatsoever, and soon we'll be wishing we never heard it at all.

Let's take a look at reality by first asking some really hard questions:

Are rethuglican congressmen THE ONLY people who are abusing Congressional Pages?

Are rethuglican congressmen THE ONLY people who are sending inappropriate emails/ims to Congressional Pages?

Is it possible that progressive Dems might get caught up in this scandal too?

If it IS possible that one person might send inappropriate messages to another person, are WE in a place to claim "no appearance of impropriety"?

Latching onto this and painting it as the ONE THING THAT SHOULD ELECT DEMS OVER RETHUGLICANS isn't going to work.

[Malidictus Maximus]

93. Any bets on how long until he 'finds Jesus'?

[cboy4]

94. F*cking Hilarious!

Bullshit siren. :spray:

Asscarrot is hilarious also.

Excellent thread :thumbsup: