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The Straight Story Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 05:54 PM
Original message
Man Blames Wife Beating On Gas Prices
Man Blames Wife Beating On Gas Prices

OCALA, Fla. -- A 77-year-old man told a deputy he roughed up his 74-year-old wife because he was upset about the high cost of gas for driving her to and from dialysis treatments, according to police.

IMAGES: More strange stories, images

Authorities said Richard Close was charged with aggravated battery and battery on a person over 65.

Close said that his life turned upside down when doctors in Illinois placed his wife on kidney dialysis.

http://www.local6.com/news/15458791/detail.html
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Warpy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 06:11 PM
Response to Original message
1. Gee, her kidneys failed and she has to endure dialysis
Edited on Sat Mar-01-08 06:11 PM by Warpy
for several hours a day three times a week and HE is inconvenienced to the point of having his life turned upside down? He blames HER and not the underlying illness?

How very typical. What a narcissist!
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knitter4democracy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 07:10 PM
Response to Reply #1
5. Like when my hubby called me weak for needing his help after surgery?
After 10 years of horrendous pain, the last year of which was brutal, I had an exploratory surgery that found it was appendicitis all along. Hubby, being a doctor, felt just awful he'd missed that diagnosis, and a week and a half after my surgery, when I was still having trouble bending over and doing stairs and such, he lost it and yelled at me when I asked for his help on something.

I got royally ticked off and called his doctor, getting him an appointment for an assesment, and things have been better since.
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Warpy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 08:08 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. Really?
Mine showed up in the hospital and bitched nonstop about how he didn't have any clean clothes and he was getting sick of fast food and the house was getting messy. My appendix had burst because I'd blown it off too long and was in bed in isolation with a temperature over 104.

I got a divorce.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 10:10 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. I got a divorce.
i am thinkin

thank the lord i havent had any illness or anything else to trouble my hubby.

geeesh, to these stories. not good to hear.

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knitter4democracy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-02-08 10:50 AM
Response to Reply #7
10. Nah. Mine felt so guilty and horrible about missing the diagnosis that he lashed out.
Stupid, yeah. Understandable, though. He made it up by catching my kidney tumor when my regular doctor at the time (since fired) said she wouldn't have done the CT for another six months. Who knows where that tumor would've gone by then or what it would've turned into (it had some cancer cells in it but not enough to meet the definition, so with time, it might have gone cancerous). I've forgiven him. :)
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knitter4democracy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-02-08 10:48 AM
Response to Reply #6
9. Whoa. That's beyond the pale.
Divorce is a good idea when he cares that little that you almost died, for crying out loud. I hope you brought that up in the proceedings.
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Hekate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 06:30 PM
Response to Original message
2. Hopefully the "system" will get a social worker on the case to check on HIS health too....
Edited on Sat Mar-01-08 06:33 PM by Hekate
He's 77. Is this an abrupt change in his behavior (small strokes, senility, depression) or has he always been an abusive jerk? The answer to that question should determine further course of action by the law.

Regardless, they are in their late 70's and if typical, are living on a fixed income in inflationary times. Where is their support network? Are their grown children living far away and unaware of the surging stress in their parents' lives? Are they even able to help out?

My own mother (who lived hundreds of miles from us) used to drive my sister and I nuts by refusing help because she thought it was humiliating to need help. She said she'd rather die than be dependent on her kids. Then she would complain to me that her sister's son didn't do enough to help his mother -- until the day I asked, "Does Aunt Charlotte tell Bill she'd rather die than be dependent on her kids?"

I don't hold with spousal battery, ever. But this one deserves a closer look. I think they both need help, and a lot of it.

Hekate
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 06:44 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. My grandfather had TIAs and Alzheimer's that made him too much for
my Nana to deal with in the end. :(
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knitter4democracy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 07:07 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. I agree. There's probably more to the story.
For him to lose it like that over driving her to treatments (which are costly and horrible for her to go through) means either something more is going on or he's really depressed about her needing those treatments that are so hard to go through and he can't make it better.

Or he's always been abusive. Either way, doctors and social workers need to get involved.
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seabeyond Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-01-08 10:12 PM
Response to Reply #2
8. good post
i so many ways....

thanks
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Ilsa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Mar-02-08 11:00 AM
Response to Reply #2
11. I think you hit the nail on the head.
This man may be in a position that he can't handle and he took his frustration out on his wife. He needs to be assessed also to see if additional help with managing her illness will help them both. He may be grieving in anticipation of losing her.
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