Another victim of school bullying

[Joe Bacon]

http://www.masslive.com/news/index.ssf/2009/04/mom_says_springfield_boy_11_wh.html?category=Deaths+category=Education+category=Springfield

Two days after the worst day of her life, when she found her 11-year-old son had committed suicide by hanging himself, Sirdeaner L. Walker said on Wednesday she wants the bullying to stop.

She found Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover hanging by an extension cord on the second floor of their 124 Northampton Ave. home Monday night after he had endured another day of taunting at New Leadership Charter School, where he was a sixth-grader, she said.

"I just want to help some other child. I know there are other kids being picked on, and it's day in and day out," said Walker, 43.

My heart goes out to this mother. I just don't know what can be done to stop this.

[rrneck]

1. We are becoming a

nation of assholes.

[Fumesucker]

13. Becoming?

I disagree, we have *been* a nation of assholes for a long time. I'm almost sixty and this happened to me in school, no one did anything about it.

[Rebel Scum]

21. Same here

I was bullied as a kid in the 60's and no one took me seriously about it. This has been a silent epidemic for far too long.

[keroro gunsou]

46. i was bullied in school in the 80's

and the only time something was done about it was when i decided to fight back and i was the one that got in trouble.

granted it's the nature of the beast for kids to be toxic, cruel little shits, but that's no reason to tolerate it. i was shocked that my very proper catholic school allowed it to go on for as long as i was there, it's probably still going on, only a magnitude worse with this new-fangled technology and stupid parents that cannot fathom why their special little angel is the living incarnation of orcus and defend them at every turn.

i give my parents credit, they did try to get the school to do something, but the school dropped the ball, more likely acquiesced to the parents of the bullies. and that stung more that the daily shit i put up with.

the one bright spot of this was i did learn to verbally defend myself. when dealing with some of the knuckle-dragging pea brains that i did, sometimes all it took was a moment of mental pain to make a clean getaway...

that said, this shit has got to stop. how many bright kids are crushed beneath the wheel of bullies every year for the crime of being smarter or just plain different? for me i learned to keep my head down, my mouth shut, and my opinions to myself for the longest time... and that's no way for a kid to grow up.

[Blue_Tires]

55. +1

you pretty much described my experience as a kid in the 80s

[MindPilot]

59. Having had experience on both sides of the parochial and public school fence

I think it was worse at the Catholic school.

[keroro gunsou]

72. yes it was

especially if the nuns got involved. they'd smack the bully and the victim, and usually the victim got it worse. none of the nuns at my school dared take a swing at me, for one thing i was bigger than they were by the time i was in 7th grade, and two, my uncle was a catholic priest in the office of the archdiocese... the department of edumacation.... they laid on hand on me and their ass would have been grass. didn't stop them from the verbal abuse... "we expected better from father charley's nephew...."

a pox on the lot of them.

thankfully the nuns i had in high school we the sweetest ladies on the planet. the nun who worked the library loved me... i was always in there reading something... though not always doing my homework...

[Ignis]

60. LOL @ the Orcus reference.

Ya big geek! :toast:

[keroro gunsou]

74. orcus

was the easiest name to spell out of those d and d demons and devils...

sometimes, when i see how badly kids these days behave it really makes me question if i really want to be a teacher. in some cases, their parents enable the bad behavior, and with my luck, those are the parents i'd have to deal with. and my personality and general disposition doesn't make that easy. fortunately, most of the people in my area lack the ability to process and use sarcasm properly... that might be my only out... :evilgrin:

[TK421]

73. Same here....and my parents put me in karate

Catholic grade school....I can't even get into some of the shit that happened in that fucking hellhole but I could tell you stories you would swear were exaggerated; that would take too long.


The shit stopped at school-it's a shame it takes something like that for it to make it stop, but it worked wonders. These little shitheads need to be held accountable for their actions; it is about damn-well time they are held accountable.

Kids will be kids....suck it up....oh, who WASN'T teased in school? These are not excuses for this type of behavior, and I want to smack the living shit out of people when they spout that garbage.

[applegrove]

2. Who are the parents of the kids who are bullying? I would like to know who

they are so something can be done. The parents, not just the kids, need to be educated.

[bluestateguy]

4. They don't need to be educated

they need to be put in jail.

[applegrove]

7. I really think someone should do a study on who the parents of the bullies are. What

is their religeon, what is the political offiliation, what type of careers are they in. I think the curtain should be pulled wide open on who these people are including the psychological state (whether they have personality disorders themselves or if one or both parents are abusive). We talk about bullying and how to stop it a the "kid" level. But we don't talk enough about it at the parent level.

We've stopped people from drinking and driving in a generation. If we open up the families who produce bullies then they may be less likely to allow their kids to bully if it is going to reflect badly on them and tell the world what kind of people they are.

[ColbertWatcher]

11. I'd like to see your post as its own thread. n/t

[applegrove]

45. I'll do it next week. I'm busy right now and the weekend is slow for posts. I hope I remember.

[ColbertWatcher]

52. Sadly with the way things have been going, we may get another reminder.

:(

[JeanGrey]

14. We've stopped people from drinking and driving?

In what country, because that sure hasn't happened in the U.S.!!

[dsc]

38. stopped is an exaggeration

but drunk driving has been greatly reduced to the point that a humungous percent of it is done by hard corps alchies.

[Rebubula]

20. Considering...

...that a pitcher from the Angels (and two other people) was killed by a drunk driver two days ago...I do not think that your statement about stopping Drunk Driving is accurate.

I do understand what you are saying - we have made it more of a social stigma and stepped up enforcement of laws - but stopping...not so much.

[Sen. Walter Sobchak]

62. the bullies at my school were virtually all white trash

Basically tenth generation losers lashing out at anybody who had the potential to be successful in life.

[JI7]

3. i wonder if Bullying now is worse than before

with the internet, cell phones, messaging etc.

before it happened at school but when you get home you can kind of get away from it. not always possible now.

[Joe Bacon]

6. I remember the Facebook case here in Los Angeles

Where the neighbor bullied a girl via Facebook and drove her to suicide. That evil wench should face the death penalty for what she did!

[Joe Bacon]

5. It seems that these suicides are increasing at a dangerous rate.

The one from last week in Ohio really upset me and brought back a whole load of bad memories I had. I just feel so sad for this child's mother. I just do not know what can be done to stop this.

[Ken Burch]

8. I remember being bullied through junior high school

(I was guilty of the horrible crime of being a short fat kid with glasses who wasn't good at sports-almost capital offense in the schools of my hometown).

Never actually felt like ending it, but I can understand the impulse.

The cycle of violence has to be stopped. And as much as anything else, the notion of teaching your kids to see life as "a battle" in which only those who "kick ass" can succeed needs to be wiped out.

Or this will just keep happening. And we'll keep getting bully presidents like this:

[Control-Z]

9. I hear a lot about educating

children to deal with being bullied - and I have my doubts to its effectiveness. But I want to know why there aren't strict rules, laws, and education to stop the bullies. It is always the same when someone is victimized. The victim becomes responsible for becoming educated, for preventing, and for dealing effectively with their pain. It is never about the bully until something tragic happens, and even then it is seldom taken seriously enough.

The bullies are almost always known by teachers, students, parents and the community, yet they are not called out for their behavior. They are not stopped. The one being bullied is called out, and then expected to cope.

The bullies need to be stopped right from the start - before the damage is done. With punishment, education, or with whatever it takes.

[acmavm]

12. Because these kids, who as you point out, are well known to teacher's

and everyone else. They are the 'cool' kids, the jocks. And they are allowed to pick on the weaker kids because they are seen as special, better. And they are given a pass.

Seen it for decades. And everyone talks about it but no one ever does anything.

[Control-Z]

27. Bullying needs to become

a punishable crime. Period. Our current culture seems to produce more bullies than ever, and there are few who really ever grow out of the mindset.

But you're right. It's the cool kids, and they often grow up to be the powerful adults who thrive on keeping others down.

I feel so much for the parents of these children who commit suicide. My heart just aches.

[ChazII]

37. Agree with you 100%. The site below is an interesting one to read

http://www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov/HHS_PSA/pdfs/SBN_Tip_6.pdf

In Arizona: http://www.lawforkids.org/laws/view_law.cfm?id=29&topic=BULLYING
Bullying Laws

Arizona has a new law that requires schools to have policies on bullying, harassment and intimidation. The message is clear: create an environment where bullying is not tolerated. Each school is required to have a procedure for students, parents and teachers to confidentially report bullying behavior to a school official to trigger investigation, punishment and prevention of further bullying behavior. (A.R.S. §15-341). If the bullying acts threaten or actually cause injury to a person or property, then more severe penalties are called for and carried out under Arizona’s criminal laws. (A.R.S. §13-2911).

Resources

The Arizona Department of Education has information and resources for bullying prevention for students, parents and teachers.

[trudyco]

40. Unfortunately this doesn't work for girl bullying - they use mind games nt

[ChazII]

41. I know. Girls are the worst

and I teach 3rd grade.

[Vanje]

50. Good for Arizona! nt

[Vanje]

49. Bullying IS a punishable crime

...if it happens to adults.

If I get menaced,intimidated, harassed or assaulted, you better believe I'm going to call the cops.

I do not understand why our schools allow bullying to continue. Its a crime. It should be treated as a crime.

[ColbertWatcher]

10. "daily calling him gay" I think it's time Rick Warren explain himself.

Every time a kid is bullied at school by other children calling him/her "gay," the fundies need to be called onto the carpet.

If the NRA can be blamed after every mass-shooting, religion must take its share of blame for stigmatizing homosexuality.

[timtom]

15. Rick Warren, again?

Really! That sort of name-calling has existed long before Rick Warren.

A better icon really would be Fred Phelps. Seriously.

[ColbertWatcher]

17. I see no difference between the two. n/t

[timtom]

18. One is full of pure hatred

and the other has made moral choices not born out of hatred.

[ColbertWatcher]

51. And yet, they've both come to the same conclusion. n/t

[Vanje]

53. "moral choices not born out of hatred"....

Moral choices carefully cultivated to make Warren a huge amount of money and a whole lot of power over people.
And money.
Did I mention money?

[RebelOne]

16. My friend's 15-year-old son committed suicide

a few years ago because of school bullying. He was very overweight and was harassed about it in school. One day, he took his father's .22 pistol to school. He stood up in class and said he wasn't going to take it any more. He then shot himself in the head.

[HughBeaumont]

19. And collectively, America's schools are going to solve it by . . .

. . . doing absolutely nothing about it.

Because it doesn't exist to them.

"What can we do? Name-calling isn't illegal and we can't prosecute every minor for assault! These kids should have defended themselves; use their words. Unfortunately, the weak must ALWAYS be culled from the herd."

Assholes.

[BlooInBloo]

22. Is the bullying *worse* than it used to be? Or are bullied kids taking it *harder*?

[surrealAmerican]

24. ... or are we just hearing more about it?

Before the internet, I would not have heard about an incident like this one unless it happened in my town or a neighboring one.

[aikoaiko]

23. very sad.

bullying is serious responsibility for adults

and so is helping kids deal with bullying.

[kctim]

25. My son was the victim of a bully, school did nothing

I told him what to do. Gave him permission to do it. He was suspended for a week.
He's no longer bullied.

[KansDem]

54. If what you told him to do was "cold-cock" the bully...

I agree. I was bullied to some extent in junior high and high school (not as much, but there were still some trogs struck in neutral maturity-wise), and to this day I wish I would've hauled off and clobbered them. A one teacher as well--teachers can be bullies, too.

But I was told (by school counselors) to "turn the other cheek" and that getting mad only pleases the bully.

I have an 11-year-old son who has been subjected to some bullying (one or two kids), so I told him just the opposite, "If anyone bullies you, stand up for yourself and deck him! We'll sort it out in the principal's office).

He was suspended for a week. He's no longer bullied. When I was in seventh grade, there was one bully I finally had it out with. He had taunted me since fifth grade and I had had enough. We stared duking it out outside the PE office after school and were stopped by our PE teacher who sent us to the principal's office. We both were suspended (for only a day), but he never bothered me again!

[havocmom]

61. Basically a passive child, I snapped one day and beat the crap outta 3 boys

who tormented a pal one day too many. She finally couldn't take their torture and in a weak moment, cried. That made them worse and I took my old metal lunch pail (with old style glass lined metal thermos bottle inside) and ran them all down and nearly knocked them unconscious.

They were very well behaved after that. And soft-sided lunch boxes came out soon afterward too.

[Zodiak]

69. LOL...good one

Back in the day, "snapping" with a lunch-pail was a great way to get the bullies off of you.

[Zodiak]

68. I have to agree with your approach

As much as I would like to push for pacifism, in light of the fact that the authorities do nothing about these situations for various reasons, fighting back is still the best remedy.

I was bullied mercilessly for a brief period of time (4th-8th grade) because of buck teeth and then braces with headgear. I did not help that half of my curriculum were all "gifted" classes, either.

It took me setting a few "examples" for the bullies in my school for them to finally get the picture, and I got in trouble a couple of times for it. I was small and fought pretty dirty...rocks and sticks if I could get my hands on them...taking the bully by surprise when possible. But I was never bullied again.

Bullies target what they perceive as weak....it is really they who are weak, and sometimes you just have to make that fact clear to them.

[TexasObserver]

26. This bullying phenomenon among the young really troubles me.

Until the past ten years or so, bullying was largely done by a handful of kids who clearly had serious problems. But in the past decade, it seems to have become widespread, with gangs of otherwise decent kids engaging in the worst kind of bullying.

I know that myspace has made the bullying phenom go viral, and added greatly to the problem.

I believe there have to be harsher penalties for bullying. Kids should be able to go to school without fearing that sort of thing, and schools have a duty to give them that protection. More time finding bullies and less time finding kids smoking or carrying.

[MadHound]

28. First thing is that the parents of bullies need to get their own kids under control

Stop trying to toss the problem onto the schools, they already have enough problems. The fact of the matter is that the reason why a kid becomes a bully lies in that child's homelife. Therefore the parents need to take an active part in bringing their child under control.

[TexasObserver]

30. It is the SCHOOL's responsibility to ensure the safety of students.

You are free to blame the parents of the bullying children, but your personal judgment has no bearing on the legal and moral duty the school has to protect children.

[MadHound]

34. And it is the PARENTS' responsiblity to insure that their child is well socialized

First off, most bullies that I've known are acting out because of something that is happening in their home life, abuse, neglect, etc. That falls on the parents' shoulders. Furthermore, when the schools bring it to the attention of the parents that Johnny is a bully, in many cases they laugh it off or otherwise encourage it. How many bumperstickers have you seen stating that my kid can beat up your honor student? I've seen plenty of that shit around here. There's a certain set of parents that glorify violence, anti-intellectualism and conformity, and they pass that mix on to their kids. Then they turn their kids loose on the school, and when Johnny gets sent home for beating up somebody, what do these parents do? Get pissed at the school, not their kid.

Sorry, while the school has a duty to provide a reasonably safe and secure environment, the fact of the matter is that when it comes to things like changing the attitudes of bullies and the like, parents have much more influence than the school. Like I said, most bullies are acting out because they themselves are being abused outside of school, the parents need to be held to account for that. Secondly, it is the parents who create and reinforce the attitudes of bullies, and they also need to be held to account for that too.

But sadly, most people, like yourself, choose to simply blame the school and give the parents a free pass and it's that sort of attitude that has led to more and more parents neglecting their responsibilities as parents, instead piling those responsibilities on an already overburdened school system. It is the parent's responsibility to have a well socialized child, just like it's the dog owner's responsibility to have a well socialized dog. When a dog breaks loose and attacks a child, we hold the dog owner responsible. When a child goes off and bullies another child, why aren't we holding the parent responsible?

[TexasObserver]

39. It's the school's legal responsibility to protect children in school.

The school is legally and morally responsible for the safety of children during school, irrespective of the lousy parenting bullies may have received. The school is not to blame for the bullying children's attiude, but it is responsible for managing those ill behaving children.

You continually attempt to give the schools a pass and blame only the parents, but it's not the parents who have the responsibility to make the children safe at school. It's the school district. If you still don't understand this, ask the superintendent to explain the difference between the law and your personal opinion.

[MadHound]

42. Try reading for comprehension

I stated upthread ". . .the school has a duty to provide a reasonably safe and secure environment" But in your haste to exonerate the parents of all responsibility in this manner, and dump the whole problem in the lap of the schools, apparently you didn't read that statement.

I have stated who owns what sort of responsibility. Yes, it is the school's responsibility to provide a reasonably safe and secure environment. It is also the parents responsibility to socialize their children so that they can get along in school. Instead, more and more parents are neglecting that responsibility and are allowing little monsters to get on the bus and go to school. That's where bullies are created, in the home, not in the school. So gee, maybe if both parties hold up their respective ends of the bargain, we would have much less bullying. But it's only going to get worse if the parents neglect to keep up their end.

So why are you giving parents a pass?

[TexasObserver]

57. I'm not the one having a problem with reading comprehension.

Your personal pique over bad parenting is of no bearing.

Like I said, if you don't believe me, call the Superintendent and get someone at his or her office to explain to you why the school is charged with the legal duty to protect children in their care.

One of the things schools need to do is get rid of cranky teachers who won't do their jobs. They're one reason students misbehave so much and get away with it. Time to cull the ranks of teachers and get rid of all those who can't understand they work for us, we don't work for them. As President Obama says, we need to improve the ranks of teachers, and part of that means getting rid of the ones who can't get the job done.

[MadHound]

64. Apparently you are

Since the first time around you didn't notice my statement concerning school responsibility. Instead you just blasted me, and still are, thinking that I'm wanting to hold only the parents responsible. I'm not, as my statement above proves.

However I am wanting parents to do something that they're currently not doing, and that is take ownership and responsibility for socializing their kids, something that parents have been increasingly slacking off on for the past thirty, forty years. Bad child behavior doesn't start at school, it starts at home, and like I've said, and many other experts have said, a child who bullies is usually a child who's got some major problems at home, things like abuse or neglect. Yet you're wanting to ignore all that, ignore all those experts, and simply keep piling the shit up at the schoolhouse door. Sorry, but in loco parentis only goes so far, and right now it's bursting at the seams.

As far as getting rid of teachers, you're really fulfilling my opinion that I hold about you. You're increasingly coming across as another anti-education, anti-teacher critic who thinks that the answer to all of educations wrongs can be laid at the feet of the most powerless people in this equation, the teachers. Sorry, but look in the goddamn mirror. It is people like yourself you continue to vote down school funding, it is people like you who are pushing a two tier education system, it is parents like you who don't socialize their kids, it is all these factors and more that are out of the teacher's control, yet have a huge impact on education, yet you continue to lay the entirety of the blame at the feet of the teacher.

I'm done with you and this conversation, I don't need this kind of grief here. You've shown your true colors when it comes to education, and it's not pretty. Thanks for being part of the problem, not part of the solution. Peace:hi:

[TexasObserver]

65. Nope. I understand perfectly the situation and what you're trying to say.

I just don't share your opinion.

As for your suggestion that I fit into some crazy category of teacher haters that exists mainly in your head, that's wrong, too. Part of the problem is school administration, part of the problem is teachers who fail to do their jobs, and part of the problem is parents who are absent either literally or otherwise. The bad parenting does not excuse the bad administrators or the bad teachers. Our school systems require the school district personnel, which includes teachers and administrators, to protect students from bullies. It is not a duty that can be avoided by wailing about the bad parenting of some students. It is a given that there are bad parents, but that has no bearing on the duty of school personnel to protect students from bullies.

[Iris]

63. when we did things that even hinted at bullying, both the school AND our parents stepped in

[TexasObserver]

66. Yes, those were the good old days that used to exist.

As I indicated in my post, I'm concerned about the situation that exists NOW, not when I was growing up.

[havocmom]

71. You nailed it!

It is a failure at home and schools are expected to fix things they cannot even address.

[a la izquierda]

29. I was bullied for a while in elementary school.

One particular girl tormented me; funny thing, she had been my friend for years and just turned. She would punch me in the head with annoying regularity. I was afraid if I hit her back, I'd get in serious trouble (not from the school, but from my mom).
When I got to middle school, the girl left me alone. I guess that being a very muscular swimmer made her realize I could probably knock the crap out of her if I wanted.
But another group of girls decided they hated my friends and I in high school (luckily, I had friends and was a good athlete, so I had some protection). I never got the physical abuse that a friend of mine got. I sort of shook it off.

The girls that bullied me are all town-lifers. They'll never leave the place we grew up in (a crappy little suburb of NYC with more stripmalls than green spaces). They live pointless lives. I don't and that is my triumph. One of them tried to hit me up on facebook...my response to her was, how shall I put this...eviscerating. And I have to say, I took sick pleasure in it.

The point is, I never defended myself. It caused a whole bunch of issues when I was in college, as anybody who threatened me either received a vicious verbal attack or an ass-kicking. I went from pacifist to a fighter in about 60 seconds. Now, I'm back to being a pacifist. However, when (and if) I have kids, they will be permitted to defend themselves if they are being bullied. No weapons, or anything like that. And my kids would know that they have parents who will fight for them, not punish them, if they fight back.

[greenbird]

31. Did anyone else see the report on TV

about the principal who decided to do something about the bullying in his school? I can't remember what program it was on, but he had every kid fill out a questionnaire (anonymously) that named the kids who were doing the bullying. Then he made a concerted effort to work with those kids (the bullies), involving them in things like sports, one-on-one work with teachers, etc. I was only half-watching. He was getting some amazing results.

[rvablue]

56. I saw this. I think it was ABC news???

But I can't remember exactly either.

And yeah, after the questionaires were filled out, it turned out it was only a handful of kids that were infecting the whole school with bullying. And the principal discovered that most of the bullies were having a lot of problems at home. But when he removed them from the general population for special classes and counseling the bullying took a drastic drop.

It actually surprised me how well this principal's idea worked.

[renate]

70. what a phenomenal idea!

I'm sure all the kids (all but the bullies) breathed a huge sigh of relief, finally being able to name the bullies without risking their own safety.

I just read the article about that poor kid... just a baby. It breaks my heart and makes me furious that sweet, tender children are being tormented like that. :cry:

[roody]

32. The US is a bullying culture.

[closeupready]

44. Yes.

Correct. If anyone needs evidence, witness all the violent films and TV shows and just the general culture.

[MindPilot]

33. when it come to bullying the victim is always to blame

I remember how my parents rationalized it. They would tell me that I must be doing something to make myself attractive to bullies. Or mom would explain to me that bullies acted out of jealousy and they beat me up because I had a better life than they did. (yeah, mom, I'm going to school in a hand-made shirt, second-hand shoes and pants with patches on the knees. Tell me again about that "better life".)

The only thing bullies understand is violence; children who are victims of bullies should be allow to exercise their right to self-defense.

[keroro gunsou]

48. and that's the problem

usually when the victim fights back, they end up getting in trouble at school, the bully gets a pass, and the system victimizes the victim again. needless to say, the one time i physically responded to a bully in grade school it ensured that no one in the school ever bothered me again.

fortunately for me, we had a new principal that year and he let me explain my side of the story before suspending me for two days. from what i heard from my teacher, he called in the parents of the kids that were bullying me and read them a riot act of fire and brimstone that would have made billy sunday proud.

admittedly, it would have been nice had that happened three years ago when the bullying started, but it was a good start.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

35. What A Horrible, Horrible Story. So Sad And Tragic. 11? Wow.

To be that distraught with life by 11...

That's only twice the age of my eldest son. He's not that far off in the scheme of things. I couldn't imagine him doing that. So heart wrenching. My deepest sympathies go out to this family.

[TuxedoKat]

36. I've been thinking alot about this lately

because I was bullied in 6th & 7th grades and my daughter is now being bullied in 7th grade. I raised her to be super-strong, athletic, confident, accomplished and she is all that and is outgoing and popular too. I thought this would safeguard her from being bullied -- but guess what? Strong, confident kids get bullied too -- because bullies senxe strength and are afraid of it. My daughter is also a girl of color in a largely white community so that probably has something to do with it as well. She stands out in so many ways that she is a target for the bullying.

I think part of the solution may be in getting the kids involved. We need a public campaign for kids that makes bullying uncool and unacceptable. I think if the kids are made partners and leaders in this it could greatly help the situation.

[ChazII]

43. Teach the one being bullied verbal

defense stragegies as well as how to physically defend him/herself. My son looks like Disney's version of Quazimodo and was called freak or monster on a daily basis from birth to the end of 6th grade. I am also a teacher so I have been on both sides of this issue. Elementary school was pure hell - there is no other word to describe it. Middle and high school years were almost pure joy. His peers matured. Even after seven surgeries he still looks like the lovable hunchback from Disney and his attitude is the best. Not bragging it is a fact.

[tabbycat31]

47. I was bullied as a kid

and the school administration blamed me for it. They always took the perputrator's side in issues like that.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

58. I was bullied every day from 6th grade through 12th grade.

I graduated from high school in 1972. The other girls picked on me because I was smart, and I had no dates because I was smart and in orchestra.

I did what my mom said. I told them to go to hell. Then they would say "UMMMMMM!! You said a bad word! I'm gonna tell!" and I would say "Fine. My mom told me to.".

I never hit a kid because I was the smallest one in my class (short anyway and a year and a half younger than every one else). There were six foot tall stupid jockettes that would use my head for a basketball backboard when the teacher wasn't looking. Basketballs in the head HURT.

:wtf:

I never hit another kid or defended myself b/c I didn't want to break my hands. I'm a pianist and violinist and I will NOT hurt myself. I argued with a stupid dyke gym teacher who wanted us to sit in the floor and raise our butt off the floor, supporting on the tips of the fingers. I told her I wouldn't do it and why. She stopped.

I even got thrown out a window by a black girl who was angry, six weeks after I hit college. The Dean of Students tried to make it look like a sorority hazing incident. I told her it wasn't. My father read the hazing statute of Texa to the Dean Of Students over the phone. They did not expel the asshole that decided to get mad at me and toss me out a second floor window at midnight because I was white.

Nowadays I would have sued them, but back then nobody did that. This happened in October of 1972 at Trinity University in San Antonio, and the Dean of Students was Dr. Coleen Grissom.

:wtf:

[Pithy]

67. My son was bullied

when he was in elementary by a couple of neighborhood thugs his age, but who went to a supposedly 'Christian' private school. My son was small for his age and is the oldest, so didn't know quite how to handle the situation. We tried talking to the other parents, but they were in denial that their sweet angels could ever do anything less than perfect (despite my having caught them trying to vandalize other homes in the neighborhood and ringing our doorbell and running away numerous times!)

After this problem persisted we enrolled our son in karate and he did exceptionally well. After about a year in karate, the bullies approached him in a field and started hassling him again. He warned them to back off or they would be sorry. Of course, they didn't back off. So DS executed a neat side kick that caught one bully in the gut and dropped him like a rock. He followed with an immediate karate chop to the other kid's windpipe and walked away with both of them writhing on the ground. I watched this whole thing happen from my front yard and had to restrain myself from intervening - then I saw that DS had it handled all on his own. He walked home with his head held high and a huge grin on his face.

They never picked on him again. Now he is 14 and has hit a growth spurt and is taller than most of his peers. One set of parents, the ones who denied that their thug could ever do anything wrong, ended up divorcing, their home going into foreclosure and tons of lawsuits filed against them by debtors and former business partners. Claims of infidelity were made, and the kids ended up moving to another town entirely.

The other kid ended up going to my son's middle school. DS tells me that when he sees that kid around school, he immediately looks away and slinks off.

It made me so sad when my DS was getting picked on, but I'm so glad in hindsight that he found a way to deal with it himself, with dignity. Accounts like the one in the OP are just heartbreaking.